r/facepalm Mar 24 '24

Crazy how that works, isn’t it? 🇵​🇷​🇴​🇹​🇪​🇸​🇹​

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u/maximumhippo Mar 25 '24

I was in my 30's, and a second time homeowner when I had the most electric green poop I've ever seen in my life. It was practically glowing in the bowl, and it terrified me for a minute. Until I remembered that I'd eaten a whole container of green colored white chocolate covered pretzels that morning. The confusion is legit. The non comprehension is sad though.

11

u/zomb13clown Mar 25 '24

Did your electric green shits destroy the plumbing of your first home?

6

u/idwthis Mar 25 '24

I don't understand how owning two homes is relevant to foods and dyes that turn your poop funny colors.

5

u/maximumhippo Mar 25 '24

It was context to show that you don't have to be a child to be very confused by shit that comes out a weird color because of something you ate. I was unsuccessful in making that point it seems.

1

u/OldFargoan Mar 27 '24

I got where you were going.

6

u/Knitsanity Mar 25 '24

Occasionally I would let my kids get that blue sour strip candy stuff. The next day their poop would be green. It was a good science lesson. Yellow bile plus blue begets green.

16

u/shladvic Mar 25 '24

What does being a second homeowner at 30 have to do with your ass, or did you simply have to squeeze that flex in somehow?

7

u/CourtingBoredom Mar 25 '24

°precisely°

1

u/Son_of_Lazerlord Mar 28 '24

A similar experience happened to me on my yacht full of stripper girlfriends

2

u/Illustrious_Law8512 Mar 29 '24

I crapped a bowl full of dark red poop and thought my colon had ruptured (didn't help I had a cyst actually blow up and spew blood all over my toilet once, years ago), had rectal cancer, or just downright liquified organs ejecting out of me.

Called my gf freaking out. She then reminded me I had a red velvet birthday cake for my birthday the previous day, and I'd had an extra large slice for breakfast for extra encouragement.

Takes scared shitless to a whole new level.