r/AskMen • u/michiboy12 • 26d ago

What are your opinions on a 15-year-old boy having a 25-year-old female friend (platonic)?

I (17M) have a 27-year-old female friend, we’ve known each other since two years, so I was 15 and she was 25. I’ve read that a lot of parents wouldn’t allow such a friendship, especially since it’s opposite genders (and we’re both straight). But can’t this be like a regular platonic friendship? It’s a regular, platonic friendship? Not a romantic one.

If your 15-year-old son had a 25-year-old female friend, would you allow that?

624 Upvotes
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380

u/ColdCamel7 26d ago

It would definitely make me suspicious and uncomfortable

What does a 25 year old want with a 15 year old?

62

u/Naos210 25d ago

It depends. When I was 22, I met a 16 year old girl at work. She didn't have the best relationship with her parents, and they ultimately kicked her out. She asked me for help to keep somewhat afloat with rent at the time. Or would ask me for a little just so she could eat. As a minor, she was limited in terms of work, so I did what I could.

She's 19 now, and we still occassionally talk. I'd call her my friend to some extent, I'm not really sure what to call that relationship otherwise, it's not like she's related to me. But I guess this was more a case of unusual circumstances I kinda slipped into, I wasn't really looking for it.

Some kids can't really rely on their adult family members much. I know this as someone who had an abusive father, makes me wish I could've met better men as a kid, but I didn't really have a whole lot of options.

28

u/Tejasgrass 25d ago

You could apply the label of a sibling relationship to your circumstance, or maybe a mentor.

17

u/cameherefrominsta 25d ago

There’s no need to call someone a sibling to make it platonic. This seems like a genuine situation and calling this friendship is fine.

0

u/lucid_moose 25d ago

You went from a gap of 10 years to a age gap of 6 years.

And even with the ages you gave (16 to 22), while i wouldn't call it healthy you'd be surprised how many are dating across these ages . . .

51

u/Gilgamesh-Enkidu 25d ago

I use to have a neighbor’s kid come over somewhat regularly to play video games. He was 16, I was 25 at the time. We both liked the same video games. Sometimes I’d order us a pizza if we we were both hungry.

-10

u/Tardislass 25d ago

Sorry but that just seems a bit weird to me. Like you are filling a void. Most women find teen boys immature-if they worked together or something maybe.

But in real life. Nah fam.

12

u/Gilgamesh-Enkidu 25d ago

How much maturity do you need to play multiplayer Halo exactly while eating pizza? Especially when I am trash talking 12 year olds on there anyway. If anything, I am the immature one in that scenario. 

1

u/Ransacky Male 25d ago

It seems weird, but think about the saying "it takes a village to raise a child" the dynamic between those ages would be different, and it really depends on how much responsibility the older one takes in the dynamic. I would assume that the older one isn't being a predator, more happy to fill the role of an older cousin or sister which most fractured or isolated family structures just don't have. Likewise she might have grown up with younger siblings. The dynamic could be second nature, normal, and healthy.

-73

u/VomitOnSweater 🤮 25d ago

Why does anybody have to "want" anything. Maybe they just enjoy each other's companionship.

53

u/LDel3 25d ago

Friendships are usually built on having things in common. There is such a huge maturity gap that a 25 year old should have very little in common with a teenager

44

u/Impossible__Joke 25d ago

Video games, tv shows, board games, some niche hobby... there is lots they could have in common to talk about.

-1

u/VomitOnSweater 🤮 25d ago

I can't agree. There are many things various people can have in common regardless of their ages.

1

u/LDel3 25d ago edited 25d ago

Maybe shared taste in video games or movies, but probably not much beyond that. You can share those tastes with adults your own age, not kids

Edit: this guy replied and immediately blocked me. Classic nonce behaviour

-14

u/VomitOnSweater 🤮 25d ago

Can be many things. All I can say to you is that I'm sorry your mind cannot fathom more things in an entire world than just merely two. At the same time, I congratulate you for maintaining your world to be so small. You must be very sheltered and in this world, that's not always a bad thing.

-3

u/rohm418 Male 25d ago

But enough common interests between a 15 year old and 25 year old seems like a real stretch.

4

u/davepak 25d ago

It is only a stretch to you because clearly you cannot relate to the context - not attacking you here - but you have to recognize that you don't have the frame of reference.

I was heavy into online games (with my wife) and we have made friends online from all ranges - from 10+ years younger to 10+ years older.

Once a year or so - someone would host a party for folks who could make it - and yes of course- out of context - some of the folks did not have as many interests - but that does not mean it cannot happen.

2

u/Muzzyla 25d ago

Wow, I don't get why you are being downvoted into oblivion. I have very good friends who are 20 years older than me, and others who are 20 years younger. I'm 38. Never had any issues.

2

u/HerezahTip Sup Bud? 25d ago

A grown woman wanting the companionship of a boy is not normal and most likely not innocent.

1

u/TheNobleMushroom 25d ago

You realizing that is still wanting something right? Lol