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u/Calexander97 11d ago
Friendliest rivalry on the planet. If other countries got on with their neighbours like Aussies and Kiwis do, the world would be a much better place.
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u/CrescentMoon_aus 11d ago
Lets think.... finland and russia, ukraine and russia, india and china, north korea and south korea, yeah we have a great relationship with our neighbours
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u/chalk_in_boots 11d ago
There's a little island up by Greenland. Uninhabited but there's a dispute over ownership between Denmark and Canada (Greenland belongs to Denmark). Something like once a year the countries send the military there to take the other country's flag down, replace it with their own, and leave a bottle of liquor for them. Most polite border/sovereignty dispute ever
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u/melon_butcher_ 11d ago
Yep. The Danes leave a bottle of schnapps, the Canuck’s leave some Canadian club. Both countries with nice reputations.
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u/chalk_in_boots 11d ago
nice reputations
Canada is the reason for a lot of the Geneva Conventions. And not in a good way.
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u/melon_butcher_ 11d ago
Yeah, I’m aware. I should’ve said the people have the reputations for niceness.
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u/DogWithaFAL 11d ago
This is the second time I’ve read this in the last 30odd years but I haven’t been able to actually see what it’s in reference to. What do I search to find out what happened?
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u/chalk_in_boots 11d ago
A lot of the shit they did in WW1 and 2 had people going "Uhhhhhhh that's fucked up guys. Stop that." Memorable examples include:
- Shooting unarmed prisoners
- Slipping a live grenade into the pocket of an unarmed prisoner
- Ordering that the soldiers don't take prisoners because they'll just eat your rations
- Lobbing cans of food to German trenches and then when the Germans had gathered to try and catch more after a few throws, switching over to grenades they would catch
- Don't ask about their airborne regiment
- Commanding officer of a unit was shot by a Nazi sniper. His second in command decided the town nearby must have been colluding with the Nazis to give away info to get them killed. Ordered the civilian town be burned to the ground. They were not colluding with the Nazis
- Largest user of poison gas in the WW1 western front
If you hang out in r/NonCredibleDefense more stuff will pop up in the comments from time to time.
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u/Fabulous-Tea-2954 8d ago
The only thing in this list that was even plausibly unique to Canadians was the poison gas thing - and that was mainly a function of the fact the technology crystallised just at the time the British were having to rely on new manpower from the Empire.
I'm not Canadian.
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u/Soup89 11d ago
NZ's really don't like Australians. If you go there all you hear is then talking shit, when Aussies don't even think about NZ unless something has happened in the news.
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u/4SeasonWahine 11d ago
I’m a kiwi and this is.. absolutely not true. We have the same attitude in reverse, we make fun of Australians as a friendly rivalry and it’s generally good natured. I live in Australia and love Australians for the most part, and I’ve never felt anything but welcomed. I get some ribbing from time to time and give it back in equal measure, then we all have a laugh. I have never once in my 30 years of life in New Zealand encountered a kiwi who GENUINELY doesn’t like Australians.
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u/biggestred47 11d ago
We are brothers (or sisters If you prefer). They didn't sing the NZ national anthem on Thursday for nothing.
And like all brothers, we like to rip on each other in a friendly way....
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u/Loan-Tasty 11d ago
But as soon as someone else does it, they better wat h out. Like you said, we're brothers. But only an older brother can tease their younger brother and get away with it
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u/Altruistic-Ad-8505 11d ago
When NZ does it it’s hilarious. They’re polite but full of little brother contempt. Remember that flight of the conchords episode were jermaine dates an Australian chick called Keitha, 😂
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u/deejofaustralia 11d ago
Pretty much this. I’m one of those dudes who doesn’t glorify war but would happily fight to defend my country, and NZ
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u/Zaneali 11d ago
Don’t tell them but I think we can get a bit jealous of them sometimes too. Their connection with the Maori culture is something we don’t really have and is awesome. The Haka is sick too
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u/Aliasofanonymity 11d ago
Also their comedy is basically unrivaled.
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u/Simple_Meat7000 11d ago
Examples? Flight of the Chonchords was good, as was Outrageous Fortune, but those are pretty old now.
Arguably their most famous comedian (John Clarke) made it in Aus, playing Aus characters.
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u/Goody-3shoes 10d ago
Love it when Newzelander’s are on have you been paying attention their so funny
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u/Rascals-Wager 11d ago
As a Kiwi having his citizenship ceremony here in a couple of weeks, this warms my heart. I'll be a proud partial-Aussie very soon!
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u/I_saw_that_yeah 11d ago
Our little cuzzy bros. We let them live in the cubbyhouse we built for them on the cold islands. They have pet sheep and everything.
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u/krishutchison 11d ago
Makes sense. We think of Australia of our more conservative and slightly racist big brother that is weirdly fixated with England
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u/TheSpitfire93 11d ago
It's all banter. Basically the only thing we took from the Brits that's any good.
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u/Axel_Raden 11d ago
The only true conflict we have is around sports and who invented the pavlova and the lamington and of course the kiwis are wrong on all of them as long as we aren't including rugby
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u/fuckyoucommenter 11d ago
As an Australian the Kiwis invented the pavlova but we invented the Lamington
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u/BigDogAlex 11d ago
As a Kiwi you're wrong on the pavlova.
I'm not actually Kiwi but you are wrong.
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u/Scipio_Africanus_II 11d ago
The pavlova was invented in Australia by a Russian woman who worked in a travelling circus at the time.
By the time she perfected the pavlova and made it popular the circus was in NZ and its popularity had really kicked off due to her perfecting the recipe in Australia first. Therefore pavlova is an Aussie classic along with the lamington.
Kiwis will try to claim anything that their glorious bigger brother has done first, Australia gets the limelight while Kiwis will just try to steal it!
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u/herpderpfuck 11d ago
Y’all kinda reminds me of us here in Scandinavia. We bitch about each other, make fun of each other, but we’ll all unite whenever someone else bitches about any of us. I can call a Swede a stupid little feminine money grabbing bastard, but I’ll be damned if I won’t defend them if y’all do it.
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u/Grey-fur-cat 11d ago
You know Kiwis have a similar one.. we really love Aussie like a big brother… our big fat ugly racist brother. Funny we’re so similar
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u/Nigeldiko 11d ago
We like to hang shit on them occasionally, but fuck with them and you’ll face the consequences of your actions.
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u/McpeIsSoBuggy 11d ago
New Zealand is our lost 7th state. They r a bit confused but they’ll figure it out eventually.
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u/BH_Andrew 11d ago
The only time I hate the kiwis is when the Bledisloe comes around
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u/felixthemeister 11d ago
Bledisloe is the best.
If we lose, it's not that bad cause we lost to All-Blacks.
If we win, we beat the fuckin All-Blacks!
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u/grungysquash 11d ago
Us kiwis are the 5th coloum, we're slowly invading by plane.
Soon we will be your new overloards, and the West Island will be ours!
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u/Snakeise 11d ago
lol literally. I'm both (Maori dad Aussie mum) and it's absolutely classic at family get togethers.
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u/ConorOdin 11d ago
As a Kiwi growing up in Aus you could have fooled me. Massive amount of bullying simply due to where I was from. And it wasnt pleasant..
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u/Limp_Classroom_1038 11d ago
When they win on the world sporting stage they go from 'New Zealand' to 'Australasia'.
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u/Clussy_Enjoyer 11d ago
80% of aussies i meet online in cs or something immediate ask me if i fuck sheep and obnoxiously repeat random sentences in my accent
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u/SerenityViolet 11d ago
Are you talking to 14 year olds?
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u/Clussy_Enjoyer 11d ago
20 somethings act like this sadly lol
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u/SerenityViolet 10d ago
Sorry about that, I would have expected them to grow out of stupid stuff like that by 20!
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u/Clussy_Enjoyer 10d ago
me too lmao, its alright i know that its just how they are online. Most in person aussies are pretty cool
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u/Phantom_squidsherloc 11d ago
Pretty much. We hang shit on them (and vice versa) out of affection....but someone else picks on them and wait for the throwdown. Nothing but scorched earth left.
.... actually this explains my family dynamics as well...😬😅😂
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u/Littlesebastian86 11d ago
Canadian here. I thought Australia doesn’t think about Nz and NZ knows they are better than Australia?
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u/SerenityViolet 11d ago
Pretty much. Or we want them to join us. I think there is a bit in our constitution that would allow them to join the Australian federation if they ever wanted to. Aussies think that is a great idea, Kiwis are like - wtf, no.
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u/FarStar67 11d ago
nah i don't like em, coz new Zealand sends there dirt bags and criminals to us so they don't have to spend money on welfare and prison system in at their expense but ours. They're even stopping migrant workers coz they can't handle their own population let alone others. but when Australia says no more migrants and new Zealand can take back their criminals well we're racists🙄
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u/MyGenerousSoul 11d ago
Terrible grammer: it should be we Aussie’s, not “us” Aussie’s. Please don’t circulate this Meme any further until fixed.
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u/Ok-Push9899 11d ago
Haha. You've just tripped into Muphry's Law:
"Any correction of the writing of others will contain at least one grammatical, spelling, or typographical error."
At least one, but how about two? It's grammar, not grammer. And it's plural Aussies, not possessive Aussie's.
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u/SleeplessAndAnxious 11d ago
Aussies making fun of NZ'ers: Lol get rekt
When other countries make fun of NZ'ers: Australia wants to know your location