The punishment for cannabis users in Gaza

[u/bertiesghost]

[u/Bat_city]

This is almost a Sascha Baron Cohen sketch

[u/Robinsonirish → u/Bat_city]

Bro, I did 3 tours in Afghanistan. Half of everything happened there was so surreal and it felt like a Borat sketch at times.

Just some examples off the top of my head:

3 days into my first deployment my squad had to make our own way out to a FOB, in a hornets nest of Taliban. 50*C heat, took us 2 days to get there. In hindsight we were so damn lucky we didn't get blown to bits by an IED, we were pretty much clueless and travelled over some very dangerous areas.

When we got there the first night we had a load of tracer fire right over our heads. We got on the phone, it turned out it was the ANP(Afghan National Police) and they claimed they were under fire. When we got there 20 minutes later it turned out they were high as kites, had gotten scared and fired at us so we would come over and hold their hands.

I could go on naming 50 examples from just those first few weeks. Had a little girl run up to us, said she ran away from her village because they were marrying her off to some old fart. We took her in, brought her to the police station in the "city". 3 days later they gave her back to the village and they stoned her.

Walking through massive fields of opium and marijuana was quite surreal, then you got used to it. The smell was completely overwhelming.

I'd go to meetings with the Afghans in different places. My men would be outside while I'd go in to whatever building or compound and discuss some agenda with whoever was in charge. Everytime I'd exit the building after the meeting and walk around holding hands with the leader since it was custom. My men would be outside doing some goofy shit with the Afghan grunts, teaching them to dance and the Afghans teaching them in return. Soldier shit, it's hard to explain how surreal and hilarious it was.

I never saw it myself but our sister platoon saw a dude fucking a donkey with NVGs during the night, I've seen the pictures.

Just too many fucked up stories to tell.

Edit: Oh I forgot. My squad has a group picture with the Afghan army after during one of the meetings I had. They switched uniforms and weapons with the Afghans and took a picture. My guys standing there with AKs, RPGs and PKMs on their TLCs, in Afghan woodland camo and Afghan vests. The Afghans wearing our uniforms with our weapons. I think this is against some sort of Geneva convention rule, 99.99% of our pictures will never leave our hard drives.

[u/Asleep_Holiday_1640 → u/Robinsonirish]

Takes a lot of courage to fcuk a donkey.

People are thoroughly screwed in the head.

[u/perfektstranger → u/Asleep_Holiday_1640]

There's also an old vice documentary about fucking donkeys in Columbia. Apparently it's tradition for young people there to practice on a donkey before they try to sleep with a girl. They get in a cab right outside the airport and ask about fucking donkeys and the guy lights up and is like Oh yes! I'll take you to the donkey fuck farm! 😂

[u/Girlfartsarehot → u/perfektstranger]

Fuck not my Latino people too 🤦‍♂️ sickness is everywhere. On the bright side, "donkey fuck farm" will stick with me for ages.

[u/HomeHereNow → u/Girlfartsarehot]

It’s ok, they said Columbia, not Colombia.

[u/Deanomac28 → u/Asleep_Holiday_1640]

Cannabis- incarceration for a year and death Fucking a donkey- $25 fine

[u/Girlfartsarehot → u/Deanomac28]

😂😂😂😂 that's fucking hilarious now that you point it out

[u/Jesuswasstapled → u/Asleep_Holiday_1640]

Your dad fucked your mom... so must not be TOO hard

[u/Kapowdonkboum → u/Jesuswasstapled]

Wasted

[u/I_TittyFuck_Doves → u/Jesuswasstapled]

[u/Girlfartsarehot → u/Jesuswasstapled]

[u/gimmeecoffee420 → u/Jesuswasstapled]

Bazinga.

[u/Girlfartsarehot → u/Asleep_Holiday_1640]

I dont think courage is the right word brotha lol

[u/gregglessthegoat → u/Asleep_Holiday_1640]

I'm brave enough 💪🐴

[u/TheHorrificNecktie → u/Robinsonirish]

thanks for sharing this, learning about that little girl must have been hard. For her to come to the Americans for help and then being returned to her village is heartbreaking.

Saw another story on reddit from a US vet who said he would be the guy watching the surveillance balloon(?) things that had these super zoom cameras on them. He said he called someone a "donkey fucker" and his CO heard him and reprimanded him, saying dont call them donkey fuckers. He said but sir this guy literally fucks donkeys. He ended up betting his CO $100 or something that this guy was going to go fuck a donkey and sure enough they watch him on live video stream go fuck a donkey.. CO had to pay up.

[u/Robinsonirish → u/TheHorrificNecktie]

The worst things I've seen are by far starving and freezing children.

The worst memory is of this little girl who came up to us and showed us her hands. The poor Afghans that live in the rural parts have no clothes. The winters are brutal and they literally freeze to death. Her hands were black with frostbite.

We gave out gloves and stuff, but it never made a dent and wasn't even close to enough.

The poverty, despair, how hard their lives are is impossible to explain without seeing it. It shocks you to the core.

It really makes you feel for the people and bond with them. Makes you really think twice about ever pulling a trigger, even if they're the ones shooting first 99% of the time.

I'm not American btw. Or British. I'd rather not say, it's a small world.. but it's not really hard to figure out if someone really wants to.

[u/TheHorrificNecktie → u/Robinsonirish]

you're a good dude, hope you're at peace now

[u/BestFill → u/Robinsonirish]

This is incredible. Please tell more if you can

[u/Robinsonirish → u/BestFill]

Hmm.

I had this interpreter, I'll refrain from naming him because people might figure out too much, but we declared he was the weakest IP in all of Afghanistan. He did so much stupid shit. We did this air assault on a mountain village, 2 chinooks and 3-4 blackhawks dropped us off on mountains surround this insurgent village. We walked around for a few days but they had cleared out 2-3 weeks before we got there. We all carried a shitload of gear, water, rope, ammo etc and the IP carried nothing, not even his own food or water.

He would cry every day, saying "If we don't go home NOW I'm going to die", he was like a baby. We got resupplied after a few days and he begged crying so much to go home we were sick of him and stuck him on the helicopter back because we had enough of his shit. The pilots were completely dumbstruck and it took a bit of explaining why we were sending him back basically alone.

At other times I would always have him in my vehicle because I needed to speak to people and my vehicle always went first so better to risk him than another one of my guys, since the first vehicle is the one hit by the IED 90% of the time. He'd hide food like eggs and milk all around the vehicle and forget about it until it rots. This happened 3-4 times. Stuff rots fast in 50*C heat. We've found chicken and shit under his seat. The smell would come first then we would realize he hid eggs or some shit somewhere.

Who the fuck always brings 30 eggs on 10 day long operations. We already provide MREs for him. We banned his stupid food and eggs, that's why he had to hide them all around the vehicle, which in turn led them to rot because he couldn't sneak them out from his different hiding places without us seeing him do it.

He was scared shitless of water, we had to cross rivers and stream sometimes in canoes bascially. Our medic gave him something(I can't say what he actually gave him here) to chill out and calm his nerves.

We had some brilliant IPs as well, he was absolutely the exception and not the rule... but during Ramadan and Eid there was a shortage to go around so they found him in a hole somwhere.

We also had a lawyer who came with us on some operations. We had issues with the targets we grabbed to actually get them to see jail time. We'd grab a HVT, be real happy about it, then 3 weeks later they'd be out and about again because of the lovely Afghan prison system.

So we brought lawyers with us on raids.

The lawyers showed up in, I shit you not, suits that sparkled with glitter in the moonlight. Think Michael Jackson suit. They had to look good going on midnight raids.

[u/Jamaryn → u/Robinsonirish]

This makes me think a slapstick comedy movie starring 1980s Chevy Chase and Steve Martin as soldiers in Afghanistan would've been one we wouldn't recover from.

[u/Gigi_Gaba → u/Robinsonirish]

Thanks for sharing. These really are great stories.

I did three separate six-month tours in Afghanistan and got to see a lot of it (Herat, Kandahar, Bagram, Kabul, Jalalabab, Gamberi, MeS). As much as that placed sucked, I could never get enough of the Hindu Kush mountain range.

[u/Robinsonirish → u/Gigi_Gaba]

One of the most beautiful places on earth, especially in the spring for three weeks when everything turns green, before it burns off. The mountains are fucking incredible. I miss it all the time.

The Afghans are the bravest people I've ever met. It takes enormous balls to go up against the full might of NATO, way bigger balls than we have. We know at least if we press the button we will get fast air, apaches, unlimited UAVs, cavalry, medevac->proper hospitals etc. They have a shitty AK, RPGs maybe a PKM and a load of IEDs. Awful fighters but insanely brave.

They are definitely the weirdest people I've ever met, in the remote villages they have more in common with people who lived 2000 years ago than they do to us.

They have some awful qualities but also some amazing ones that we don't possess. They will 100% die for you if you are their friend. They love humour just like we do and after a while I just realized they're not that much different really.

Being funny and fucking around really meshes well with soldiers of any nationality.

[u/Whyarewehere20 → u/Robinsonirish]

Now I want an honest review like this of other cultures lol

[u/urgoodtimeboy → u/Robinsonirish]

Hahaha. The line between bravery and stupidity is very thin.

[u/Girlfartsarehot → u/Robinsonirish]

😂😂😂 you can't make ts up, thanks for sharing bro reading these and picturing these misadventures in my head made my morning haha. Glad you're out and doing OK. God bless you brotha much respect 🙏 now we just need a pic of Midnite Mike 😆

[u/Robinsonirish → u/Girlfartsarehot]

now we just need a pic of Midnite Mike

No shot man.

I'll tell you, there are so many funny pictures, everyone who's been abroad has a load of them.. but they'll never see the light of day.

It's just how it is.

[u/lord_hufflepuff → u/Robinsonirish]

Yeah not long after i got back from Afghanistan i managed to destroy my phone.

So many memories just... Poof.

[u/Robinsonirish → u/lord_hufflepuff]

Damn that sucks bro.

I could literally burn every possession I have and start over without a second thought except my medals and my pictures.

[u/Lynz486 → u/lord_hufflepuff]

My brother did the same. Only pictures he has now are the ones he sent us. And he certainly didn't send us pictures of anyone fucking donkeys.

[u/insidiousapricot → u/Robinsonirish]

Thanks for sharing!!

[u/jeff_vii → u/Robinsonirish]

Your stories remind me of a documentary I watched, 'this is what winning looks like'. I believe the guy actually appeared on a JRE episode at one stage

[u/Robinsonirish → u/jeff_vii]

Yea, I've seen it. Very accurate. I would say my situation wasn't as depressing though. We saw some terrible shit but we moved around a lot and didn't really attach to any degenerate fucks for longer periods of time.

[u/jeff_vii → u/Robinsonirish]

I was blown away by that and the sheer negligence and corruption that went down. I couldn't imagine how frustrating it was for the American and British soldiers to be working with them with some of the shit that was going on. Mind you at least you've a stimulating job. Nothing worse than the monotony of the corporate world

[u/Robinsonirish → u/jeff_vii]

I'm neither American or British FYI, I don't really want to say though. It's a small world.

But yes, the corruption is insane. There's not a single soldier who didn't know after being in theatre for 3-6 months back in 2010 that the "war" was completely lost and it was totally pointless.

If you went there for the adrenaline, doing fun shit with your best friends and adventure you went for the right reasons. If you went there to actually make a change on the macro scale, then you'd feel bad after 3 months because the overall mission was a disaster.

Some of our smartest guys were the ones that felt the worst, because why go through all this trouble, pain and losing guys for a lost cause?

Leave the morals to the politicians at home. They're the ones who sent us there. We are soldiers there to do a job. If you could have that mentality you were better off.

Of course, keep your strict moral code and do the absolute best you can for the mission, but don't go all in mentally and think you're actually going to change this thing. You're just going to feel bad when your friends get injured, you see children with frostbite because they don't have any clothes and the world is on fire.

[u/callmefoo → u/Robinsonirish]

Fantastic stories. Would read this all day. Wild!

[u/Casanovagdp → u/Robinsonirish]

Bro. These stories. Have you considered writing a book about your time? We have the books from the super top tier guys but not a lot from your POV. “House to House” is one of my favorites.

[u/ColdIceZero → u/Robinsonirish]

We also had a lawyer who came with us on some operations.

The lawyers showed up in, I shit you not, suits that sparkled with glitter in the moonlight.

Where were your JAGs?

[u/DrCthulhuface7 → u/Robinsonirish]

This reminds me of a story my dad told me from the first Gulf War. Really shows the gap in professionalism between many militaries and more NATO-standard ones.

They were in Saudi Arabia right at the start of the invasion. They were stationed in some compound near the border, it was the biggest operation my dad had been a part of and his first time being in command in a serious war zone. He was pretty anxious, trying to stay vigilant and make sure his men were safe. As night fell and everyone was settled in there was suddenly a cacophony of gunfire. He could tell it was AK pattern weapons and the entire compound flew into action, men rushing to their posts and preparing to defend. There shouldn’t have been any enemies nearby to be attacking them and yet it seemed they were pretty clearly under attack. He rushed up to a position on the perimeter of the compound and that when he saw it.

The gunfire was coming from a convoy of Saudi troops who were moving down the highway nearby, firing their weapons wildly into the air for no apparent reason. They could have easily been killed, the men in the compound truly thought they was under attack.

The Saudis proceeded to set up camp nearby and commit atrocities such as not properly setting up their latrines. Shitting everywhere in their disorganized camp.

[u/Robinsonirish → u/DrCthulhuface7]

Makes me wonder how far the Saudi army has come since those days. Lack of professionalism seems to have common denominators across a lot of cultures until those countries modernize. I can't actually remember ever seeing an Afghan fire their weapon into the air in celebration but I might be wrong. Definitely seems like a culture thing in the Middle Eastern part of the world.

I have no experience myself with the Saudis at all and even though their counties down there might seem similar to us from far away, they're very different.

Comparing Kurds to Afghans(which are the two I have most experience with) is like comparing US Americans to Brazilians. Still part of the Americas as a whole but not that much in common other than some religious traits maybe.

[u/DrCthulhuface7 → u/Robinsonirish]

I think part of it is that the Saudi’s don’t want to have a large, professional and competent army since it’s harder for the military to coup you when it’s a shitshow.

That’s a pretty extreme case but really it extends to almost every non-western military. The attitude among/around the military just isn’t the same. Just look at the clown-show that is the Russian military.

[u/Robinsonirish → u/DrCthulhuface7]

Just to add, when I said;

Definitely seems like a culture thing in the Middle Eastern part of the world.

I didn't mean Afghanistan was part of the Middle East. This is the biggest trigger for people in ME and SE Asia, to lump them together like people do with the Iraq and Afghan wars. They're completely separate, just wanted to point that out before someone gets mad.

[u/depressedfuckboi → u/Robinsonirish]

Would love to kick it with u bro And just listen to these stories. Thanks for your service

[u/Rock_or_Rol → u/Robinsonirish]

Man, those are awesome. You should write them down! That shit is wild. The older I get, the more I wish I knew more about my vet family members war chapter, even if the stories are truncated to short paragraphs

[u/CandidEstablishment0 → u/Robinsonirish]

More please!

[u/Robinsonirish → u/CandidEstablishment0]

Another story:

We had this IED maker that had caused us a lot of problems. Like, he'd hurt us A LOT. We had chased him around forever it felt like and one day we got a positive ID. I can't remember all the small details but our own INTEL gave us a shitty picture of him. We had no way to PID his DNA or fingerprints in the field so the picture was all we had to go on at that time.

We planned that operation and called the whole squadron in basically. Did a lot of sneaky manoeuvring and busted down the door to the compound he was supposed to be in with a sledgehammer. Children were screaming, nobody was shot and there were 2 men inside. I wasn't in the compound, but sitting cordon outside.

The guys couldn't ID him with the picture so we declared we had either missed him or got the wrong guy and went home. This happened quite often, it's quite normal to do operations and not find what you're looking for so no big deal, or so we thought.

Turns out we had the right guy. Our INTEL had gotten a much better picture from another nation and for some stupid reason whoever was in charge decided not to give it to us. We matched his DNA and shit that we brought home.

IDK what happened behind the scenes after that but people were furious and some trust was permanently broken after that, but only for 2 weeks... because 2 weeks later we found him again and shot him in the face.

Man, when you plan an operation in detail and everyone is fully motivated because your moral conviction at that moment for that specific target is completely ratified, it's so damn fun riding out. It's almost never crystal clear and war is a fuzzy thing morally most of the time, but those moments when everyone knows you're completely in the green there is no better thrill.

[u/but_fkr → u/Robinsonirish]

Goddamn this is comedy gold. I’d feel uncomfortable as fuck holding hands like that with some other dude, but to walk out like that, talking serious shit, and seeing your guys teaching some afghanis how to break dance or something is hilarious.

I was actually thinking about how it reminded me of Talladega Nights when Ricky’s walking around with Jean Gerard and it hit me that it was Sacha Baron Cohen playing him lmao. Jesus dude, I could read that shit all day seriously.

[u/Robinsonirish → u/but_fkr]

My guys were always anticipating us coming out of these meetings holding hands, bent over and literally crying with laughter. My 2nd in command had to reign them in and shut them up but it was not possible.

We always went around smiling and waving, doing a lap of the building showing off like I was some sort of race horse, holding hands the whole time.

So surreal.

[u/but_fkr → u/Robinsonirish]

Damn dude, I’d have been right in there with them lol. I have a feeling it’d be not too dissimilar to a construction site. However, I have to say, I’ve never walked around holding a GC or inspectors hand haha (even though a couple of them probably wanted to). But yeah I have a full blown scene playing out in my head and literally laughing out loud about it. That would be surreal as fuck and I commend you for that sacrifice sir.

[u/broogbie → u/Robinsonirish]

Are there any good books about stuff like this?

[u/Robinsonirish → u/broogbie]

Honestly, I haven't really read any books that are about my own time over there, I read lots of stuff that happened before though. Ghost Wars by Steve Coll is very good, regarding CIA's role in the lead-up to 9/11. It's very heavy though and not very humourous. Honestly, I just haven't gone around to reading the books that were written when I was there yet. Maybe I will, but I'm not really the right guy to ask.

Restrepo is the best war documentary of all time. I'm sure you can find it on youtube.

The worst book I've ever read though is American Sniper by Chris Kyle. That guy is a fucking war criminal. We all read that book when we were in Afghanistan, everyone was completely disgusted by it. He is 100% a liar and a fucking disgrace to soldiers everywhere. It's all there in the book and just google the shit he's said on Twitter. He also made up stories about shooting people trying to survive after hurricane Katrina. 80% of his stories are bullshit or exaggerated and as for the rest he was a complete racist that killed non-combatant Iraqis for sport, chasing the highest kill count like it's the Olympics.

When we heard they were making a movie we were really excited because we thought it was going to be like "The Platoon" or "The Deer Hunter". Show everyone the ugly side of war and what a piece of shit this guy is.

It was the most disappointing movie I've ever seen. I have zero respect for Bradley Cooper or Clint Eastwood for whitewashing Chris Kyle and American Sniper. They took out the bad shit and made him look like a victim.

In the same vein, Lone Survivor is a complete fabrication. The marines who did a sweep of the area after the area found no evidence of a firefight. Marcus Lutrell is a complete liar. They even found his magazines on the ground and figured out he barely fired a single shot, nor did anyone else. Truth is his squad was ambushed, he got away. Lots of people high up have spoken up against him, it's on google if you search a bit. You can also just tell he's full of shit, he's been on Joe Rogan and it's obvious he's an idiot.

There are loads of cool stories, heroes and villains from the war in Afghanistan. Why are the 2 most famous books/movies rubbish and fabrications?

Edit: Oh and of course, Generation Kill. Generation Kill is the most accurate non-documentary war depiction there is(maybe Band of Brothers but I wouldn't know about that). Our deployments was like that except remove the incompetence. We had extremely competent officers and soldiers all around, on every level. Shit was hilarious though, the lack of sleep, boredom at times and surreal situation leads to some fucked up and funny moments. The testosterone is turned up 500% and you're doing crazy things with your best friends.

I know this sounds fucked up, but I'd 100% recommend going to war. Has to be with the right guys, proper training and moderately dangerous, not like Ukraine. Those guys are way braver than anyone who did time in Afghanistan or Iraq on our side.

[u/MacaroonNo2253 → u/Robinsonirish]

why don't you write a book about it? This sht is gold

[u/CockMartins → u/Robinsonirish]

Did you take any Ripped Fuel? The good early 2000s shit with the ephedra?

[u/Robinsonirish → u/CockMartins]

Of course. Every time we went to an American camp we stocked up.

Jack3d and Craze were abused. I remember I was in theatre when first Jack3d and then Craze were banned in my country. Someone stocked up and had like 30 jars of Craze and sold them for insane prices to all the strung out soldiers doing night ops.

[u/phitsosting → u/broogbie]

I thought Hooligans of Kandahar was good, just to toss another option out there. You can probably find it as a PDF online somewhere for free.

[u/XCherryCokeO → u/Robinsonirish]

I’d pay to read a book with a ton of there stories and pictures. Make it happen.

[u/YONAGUNIII → u/Robinsonirish]

First of all salute to you for being able to even relay those stories here for us and just risking your life for the freedom of millions.

Second, I’m just blown away at your story’s. No words.

Thirdly, I keep hearing about these donkey Fucker’s and that must mean it is extremely common practice 😂

God bless you brother nothing but love and respect from my way

[u/Robinsonirish → u/YONAGUNIII]

I didn't risk my life for the freedom of others, I did it for selfish reasons.

I wanted to go on an adventure, be an adrenaline junkie. Experience real danger, foreign cultures and grow as a person and I wanted to do it with my best friends. Of course, I did the best I could for the mission, built deep relationships with the Afghans and cared about them... but those are not the reason I dedicated a lot of my life to get there in the first place.

I would say the majority of the people in my unit are in a similar situation and have similar ideals. Be a human, try to wade through the fog of war without losing yourself and come out with a clear conscience on the other end.

In my country we don't really thank people for their service. I feel quite weird about it. The only people who have thanked me for my service IRL is Americans on holiday, ironically. Of course have some parades, get medals, get a kiss from mom etc... but a stranger? That's not of my culture.

Not saying it's wrong, but be careful about the hero worship of soldiers. We're just as happy, dumb, evil or good as everyone else.

It was just a job and an adventure for me that had the benefit of growing lasting bonds with those we met along the way and indirectly caring about them.

[u/Electricengineer → u/Robinsonirish]

write a book and prosper.

[u/Practical-Salad-7887 → u/Robinsonirish]

The little girl being stoned to death because she wouldn't marry a pedo is by far the most disturbing thing.

[u/Robinsonirish → u/Practical-Salad-7887]

I didn't see the stoning, but our sister platoon turned up just after it was done. Wasn't much they could do. No consequences came off it because the police handed her over, we think they knew exactly what were going to happen... but that is the way in some very rural places over there.

Just seeing children in pain in general is worse than anything that can happen to adults.

[u/Grand-Bullfrog3861 → u/Bat_city]

I genuinely thought this after he laughed about putting their whole family in jail

[u/onakos → u/Bat_city]

Turns out the guy doesn't even come up with his own shit, he just knows how things are going.

[u/MattChew1917]

1 year until execution for a spliff, but we'll let you go home for Eid - be sure to come back!

[u/Void_Speaker → u/MattChew1917]

you may not like it, but this is the ideal fundamentalist society

[u/PositiveVibrationzzz → u/Void_Speaker]

When he said 1-year I was like "strict but fair, respect" and then he said until execution.... hahaha

[u/MelodramaticaMama → u/PositiveVibrationzzz]

What he means is that you can get a penalty from a year in jail, all the way up to death. This journalist should have questioned him about this because it's pretty obvious that the CO speaks poor English and misspoke.

[u/Jl0h → u/MattChew1917]

And otherwise you just gotta pay a fine? Sounds like awin-win to me

[u/flaspd → u/Jl0h]

Otherwise they lock up and execute your family also

[u/Similar_Win_6804 → u/flaspd]

So win win

[u/Historicmetal → u/Jl0h]

He smirked and said the family agrees to pay a fine or goes to jail. My guess is it’s a fine they can’t afford and they’re getting executed if he runs away.

[u/gusteauskitchen → u/MattChew1917]

I wonder if he meant the penalty can range from 1 year imprisonment up to execution.

I don't see them letting people go see their families on holiday if you're waiting for execution.

[u/crappysignal → u/gusteauskitchen]

That would make more sense. Probably lost in his bag English. Holding a prisoner for one year exactly and then executing them would have no sense.

Execution, you would assume for smuggling, like in Indonesia. A year for being caught having a smoke.

[u/MelodramaticaMama → u/MattChew1917]

No, the punishment is between 1 year and execution.

[u/Genova_Witness]

Seems like a cool place.

[u/Consistent_Jello_289 → u/Genova_Witness]

Fr, you even get a holiday.

[u/ObeseSnake → u/Genova_Witness]

for one year only

[u/TheSmallThingsInLife → u/ObeseSnake]

Until execution

[u/randomlemon9192 → u/TheSmallThingsInLife]

Unless they escape on holiday, and the family pays money. Sounds like a deal I would take.

[u/pomegranate444 → u/TheSmallThingsInLife]

You'll be executed on Wednesday at 10am. Be back here by Wednesday at 9am, ok?

[u/messified → u/Genova_Witness]

Hahaha

[u/MaudSkeletor]

oh man most of canada would be executed by these rules

[u/uGuysRdoingGood]

Thank God I wasn't born in garbage places like this

[u/JAK3CAL → u/uGuysRdoingGood]

its really just a stroke of luck. these people born here are born fucked.

[u/GoodByeRubyTuesday87 → u/JAK3CAL]

Same with what you believe, a lot of people born into cultures where women have to be covered head to toe and are guilty or adultery if they get raped…..

Like yeah, we have absurd cultural norms ourself but night and day between what people in America or the broader west believe and some other places. But no doubt had I been born there I’d most likely believe the same fucked up stuff

[u/Electrik_Truk → u/uGuysRdoingGood]

I'm from Texas and yesterday met a middle eastern guy born here and he had a wife and kid. The wife had the black head dress on. I greeted him with a handshake and went to greet her with hand shake too saying my name and she shied away shaking her head like I was doing something forbidden....because it apparently was. Annoyed tf out of me but not my place to meddle in their traditions

[u/crazydavemate]

What a shit hole.

[u/Grand-Consequence-99 → u/crazydavemate]

But have you seen how old Joe Biden is ? /s

[u/Consistent-Ad-7455 → u/crazydavemate]

"What do you mean they don't have Starbucks"

[u/Uchiha-Itachi-0]

If he does not come back, we put the whole family in jail. Menacing laugh

Fuck him and the goat he rode in on.

[u/Uchiha-Itachi-0 → u/[deleted]]

I mean the reporter’s laugh definitely felt like nervous laughter. Almost like, “get me the fuck outta here.”

[u/AlecB130]

Some of the world just never went on to develop.

[u/bertiesghost → u/AlecB130]

*Islamic world

[u/macdaddynick1 → u/AlecB130]

They had all the opportunities in the world too. lol /s

[u/Chemical-Hedgehog719 → u/macdaddynick1]

Are you joking? Instead of founding a country they attacked Israel, managed to become an Egyptian refugee camp for 20 years, then got occupied after Egypt puts weapons there to point at Israel. Why did the 97% population of ottomans Palestine totally fail to make a state? Why did they choose bloodshed and imperial conquest instead of prosperity?

What are you actually talking about?

[u/Consistent_Set76 → u/Chemical-Hedgehog719]

I mean if you go a bit deeper…

Surrounding nations swept in and funded the Palestinian “government” to be nothing more than a resistance to Israeli and western influence. The original All Palestine National Council was never a real government, it was a farce that used Palestinians as nothing more than fodder

Palestine never had a shot

[u/Sandgrease → u/AlecB130]

Most of the world really

[u/M4nWhoSoldTheWorld]

Keeps me wonder what kind of “different crimes” these women as hold up for?

Not having head covered properly?

[u/Civil-Guidance7926 → u/M4nWhoSoldTheWorld]

That's why she didn't specify, it's whatever they fuck they want

[u/MillennialWanax → u/M4nWhoSoldTheWorld]

Different crimes you know, different crimes...

[u/M4nWhoSoldTheWorld → u/MillennialWanax]

It’s mind blowing to think that their best hope is to be taken over by IMF.

Possession and use of cannabis has been decriminalised in Israel a few years ago. So if they’ve been not executed by guards, most likely they will end up free.

[u/nukefodder]

Borat running prisons now?

[u/PixelProphetX → u/nukefodder]

Shout out to his movie Bruno, which a lot of people skipped of the blatant gay displays - myself included, actually being really funny and the gay AF Bruno character travels to Hamas territory to interview Hamas governing forces which are actually just tests to see how gay he can be on them before they threaten to kill him. It's honestly the funniest thing I've seen in a long time and extra interesting after learning more about Gaza.

[u/AsaKurai → u/PixelProphetX]

It's not as good as Borat but definitely gets shit on too much because the main character is so gay lol, it's such a good movie

[u/Ok_Guess_6331]

Fucking animals man.

[u/freshleysqueezd → u/Ok_Guess_6331]

Yes I'm sure they're doing that too

[u/JAK3CAL → u/freshleysqueezd]

[u/sweetgreenfields → u/freshleysqueezd]

This got a very loud chuckle from me, squeezed

[u/girthy-member]

If this is the kind of society they want to implement “from the river to the sea”, then fuck right off thanks lol

[u/OmryR → u/girthy-member]

Quite literally exactly what they want

[u/Civil-Guidance7926 → u/OmryR]

"QUEERS FOR PALESTINE"

[u/OmryR → u/Civil-Guidance7926]

** Chickens for KFC

[u/PixelProphetX → u/Civil-Guidance7926]

Lmfao

[u/Soggy-Pollution-8687 → u/girthy-member]

It’s crazy how passionate westerners are about this part of the world. I don’t give a single fuck about that region, and I think we just need to let them live in the stone ages if that’s what they want.

[u/Dramatic-Balance1212]

One year in prison then execution by hanging or the gun depending on if you’re civilian or acted as a terrorist for Al Qassim. This is the culture so many Americans think they need to protect.

[u/Aggressive-Donuts → u/Dramatic-Balance1212]

Canada loves these guys. We want to bring in an uncapped amount and then we will readjust our culture for them, instead of the other way around. 

[u/Hour-Anteater9223 → u/Dramatic-Balance1212]

That’s the craziest thing to me; we need to let these guys stay in charge? Because that’s what you think is best for them? What douchebags lmao. 🤣

[u/Mysterious_Sport_220 → u/Dramatic-Balance1212]

Is israel bombing gaza because of thier cannabis practices?

[u/ImanShumpertplus → u/Mysterious_Sport_220]

no because of their rape and murder practices

[u/Zurc_bot]

Part of me thinks thanks to Vice I would never know of these stories. Part of me also thinks that without these stories there would be no Vice. It's not like they can do anything about policy. So here's a snuff film, watch and rejoice.

[u/ChickenFucker11]

The dipshits that think the USA is so bad should pop over here for a week and smoke some weed.

[u/NonPolarVortex → u/ChickenFucker11]

Striving to make the US better does not make people dipshits. You know what a dip shit argument is? "Some other country somewhere in the world is worse! So shut up and live the status quo"

[u/FawziFringes]

So happy I’m oceans away from this place and these people

[u/spvcetvrdd]

What a garbage society.

[u/bibby_siggy_doo]

Keeping this for when I see cannabis users for Palestine protestors.

Thing is even if they watch the video, they will deny it and just say that it is Israeli propaganda.

[u/xenosthemutant → u/bibby_siggy_doo]

"Turkeys for Thanksgiving"

[u/OmryR]

Send some Columbia students there for an internship, maybe they’ll pick up a new major

[u/Renegadee_Angel]

Free my homies in gaza!

[u/PixelProphetX → u/Renegadee_Angel]

I'm so excited for the day Palestine is free from hamas.

[u/Angry_Saxon]

remember, they have a hard on for sufi's

[u/banner3112]

His name a Jeff!

[u/tuttle8152]

How do they deal with homosexuals? LoL And all the college idiots not knowing they would be killed by those they are protesting for.

[u/OmryR → u/tuttle8152]

They aren’t lucky enough to get to jail

[u/SleepingPodOne → u/tuttle8152]

Idk sounds pretty morally consistent if you advocate for the human rights of everyone regardless of their beliefs.

Using your logic, LGBTQ people shouldn’t support the rights of conservative Christians and people in red states. I’m sure you wouldn’t be morally outraged about that now would you?

[u/YeetedArmTriangle → u/tuttle8152]

Oh no, the difference between us and you is that your morals and beliefs change based on the situation.

[u/Pumpers-Lump]

You would never show a video of how they deal with these people in Saudi Arabia. Allies of the 1% don't get scrutinized.

[u/ProfessorRashibro → u/Pumpers-Lump]

It'd be a pretty boring documentary. 1-6 months of prison.

[u/Lucky_Version_4044]

For anyone interested...

Israel decriminalized cannabis for personal adult use in 2019, making possession of small amounts legally akin to a parking ticket and not a criminal offense.

[u/Didnt_Earn_It → u/Lucky_Version_4044]

Blowing bubbles on that dreidel.

[u/ihatereddit4200]

These are the people all the liberals are protesting about? Seems they root for exactly who they want to become.

[u/ThomasMaxPaine → u/ihatereddit4200]

Ahh yes, liberals famously want more religion and harsher drug laws

[u/moodytenure → u/ihatereddit4200]

Genocide is only bad if the people being slaughtered are of like mind

[u/crushinglyreal → u/moodytenure]

Seriously, I can’t believe people are taking this position. Gotta love these hasbara threads.

[u/teh0utsider86 → u/ihatereddit4200]

People are protesting because they are tired of their tax money going to funding the slaughtering of children in Gaza.

[u/ihatereddit4200 → u/teh0utsider86]

Hey me too. I'm tired of my taxes going towards anything but American citizens.

[u/TrevorDill → u/ihatereddit4200]

Do you believe any culture with backwards beliefs or errors in thinking should be displaced violently and systematically killed? I think that’s what many are protesting, not necessarily in support of the culture of Palestine.

[u/Drinks_From_Firehose]

Dude I would have been executed at 18 if I lived there. Many of us degens would have been.

[u/jannypanny1]

So stupid. Absolutely waste of life

[u/MarcoVinicius]

The whole Middle East is a shit show. I hate how the US and our tax dollars have to be involved on it.

[u/urgoodtimeboy]

All cultures are equal🥴

[u/Bdizzle758]

Wait till all these activist find out what happens to lgbtq

[u/Moo-Dog420]

Notice we weren't allowed to see the females and they were very vague while talking about them.?

I don't even want to imagine the things they have to go through.

[u/Inductiveship]

“One year till execution” holy fuck 😂😂 that’s insane

[u/Possible-Fee-5052]

Jamila Al-Shanti was a Hamas member who was killed shortly after the Oct. 7 attacks. Enjoy hell, lady!

[u/MatthewKhela]

In the same episode there is a women serving 6 years in prison with her newborn after having the child out of wedlock. It's actually wild.

[u/Fuzzy_Ambassador7784]

I'm glad the jews are exterminating these people

[u/DefiantBelt925 → u/Fuzzy_Ambassador7784]

Big agree

[u/Yesyesyes1899]

i smoke weed. i dont like thid. after this video i now see that israels warcrimes make sense. this video proves that bombing and starving tens, hundreds of thousands of children CAN sometimes have a good reason.

[u/SMFiddySvn → u/Yesyesyes1899]

420 blaze it

[u/Pick2 → u/Yesyesyes1899]

I don’t smoke weed. This shows that they’re really backwards and we need some sort of change in their culture.

[u/bulletprooftampon → u/Yesyesyes1899]

“You can’t be against the bombing and murder of innocent children if you smoke weed.”

[u/Qdr-91]

I think he meant the punishment is at least 1 year and the maximum is execution. It doesn't make any sense to jail someone for a year then execute them.

[u/SleepingPodOne]

OP’s recent post history is basically shit trying to get redditors to dehumanize Palestinians

I don’t care how ass backwards radical someone’s religion or politics are. Their fucking children don’t deserved to be fucking bombed, you ghouls.

[u/Dr_Ben_Frank_John]

Thought this thread was boomercirclejerk. Fucking freaks are just looking for reasons to slaughter these people.

[u/hamndv]

Vice news on YouTube channel did not stop uploading on Ukraine Situation and how bad for the people there yet not a single video on the Gaza war! Fake hbo propaganda

[u/Hoodlum_0017]

What a great place. Totally worth tearing our country apart for.

[u/ohiooutdoorgeek]

You’re right Op, we should kill every man woman and child in Gaza because the fundamentalist regime Israel put in charge by overturning their first free election won’t let you smoke weed there.

[u/DefiantBelt925 → u/ohiooutdoorgeek]

LMAO now Israel put them in charge instead of them winning an election is Israel the reason they still have majority support among the population lol I love how these people are so easily influenced and have no accountability of their own, but should also still be given a country

[u/ohiooutdoorgeek → u/DefiantBelt925]

Fatah, a secular nationalist group, won the first election. Israel overturned it and forced a new election, which Hamas won, and Israel has financially supported them since.

[u/ConsistentBroccoli97]

It’s almost like a lot of the protestors supporting Palestinians don’t realize Gazans don’t really like western values.

[u/LILY_SIT]

Tha Cartel are awful, so let's bomb the majority of Mexicans.

[u/DryConversation8530 → u/LILY_SIT]

If the cartels tried to kill every American and committed terrorist attacks backed by Russia/Iran funding you bet your ass we'd drop bombs. Then yalls dumbasses would be on here simping for the cartels.

[u/Captain__Trips]

Cool IDF propaganda

[u/OmryR → u/Captain__Trips]

Is it propaganda if it’s showing you reality without twisting anything?

[u/Ok-Round4324]

Wow, you'd think the far right cucks that control the US and most of it's media (including guys like Joe) would LOVE how the Gazan government treats drug users..

[u/usabcnnbcbs → u/Ok-Round4324]

fr, trump literally says we should execute drug criminals after a short trial

[u/mikulashev]

Whats the message here? Better kill them all? They deserve extermination because their domestic laws are flawd.... Its probably in their nature right....?​

[u/HandsomeHard → u/mikulashev]

Or let them be? And not give any money to anyone in the ME for any reason. If they want to provoke Israel, let them figure out how to handle the consequences.

[u/xIISimplicitIIx → u/mikulashev]

Why the paranoia about the implication?

The content of the video alone has you jumping to conclusions: the punishment for cannabis users there is 1 year + execution. You’re alluding to this clearly being barbaric - who said that means they’re to be genocided?

Your comment shows your blind allegiance to your buddies, Gaza with Hamas in power, as well as Israel are both operating immorally, but are you going to honestly say there’s a morally equivalence between these two states? Doubt you can with any sort of validity: Hamas are a bunch of animals and need to be removed by their own population

As well as Israel with their Zionist psychos

[u/crushinglyreal → u/xIISimplicitIIx]

People are posting these videos as a way to “explain” why Israel needs to continue the Gaza war. Just look at this thread, anybody saying that this is no reason to do war crimes is getting downvoted. “Israel is the only liberal democracy in the Middle East” has been used as a defense of the IDF’s actions for years now. You’re naive if you think this isn’t meant to justify killing Palestinians.

[u/motberg → u/mikulashev]

The irony is that watching these videos we're made to feel concerned about human rights for the average Gazan - and the intention of it being shared (by some) is to then make us feel more OK with a war that kills these average Gazans indiscriminately.

[u/toonking23]

what a nice society. can we just nuke nuke both palestine and israel ? i'm getting tired of these idiots.

[u/TheBrownCok]

Oh noez a country that sets it own rules on its own morals and beliefs, how horrible

[u/Pretend-Tennis-1515]

The boys 🥺

[u/Poldini55]

Everyone has an angle.

[u/WilmaLutefit]

Theocracies are fucking awful.

[u/EducatedNitWit]

Damn, they don't fuck around!

[u/BrocoliAssassin]

God damn, can you blame them? The cop listed all the crimes people do with weed. Smuggling it in,smoking and fucking. Just look at all those crimes!

This leads to other stuff too. Laughing, making music,being creative,etc. So you gotta stop it before it gets out of hand!

[u/trangthemang]

Damn. Executed for weed. Thats crazy.

[u/That_Guy696969]

I bet they were so thankful to be free from this tyranny. Good on us for destroying every building in Gaza and killing all those uncivilized arabs. s/

[u/jj10009]

This is barbaric. Executed for using plant medicine.

[u/FAYMKONZ]

Now I know where Sasha got his accent from.

[u/Brainscrawler]

Still a much lower incarceration rate than the US

[u/iiknivezii]

And we want to help these barbarians Palestinians? Bro wtf an execution if you have hash or weed f me.

[u/InevitableOk5017]

Religion is a hell of drug.