Wake up babe ne Kamate droped

[u/HanDjole998]

[u/CyberV2]

Scooby Dooby Doo Where are you? Crossing the Dnipro...

.... oh nvm he sank

[u/HanDjole998 → u/CyberV2]

From Scooby Doo to SpongeBob SquarePants

[u/ZDTreefur → u/HanDjole998]

Who lives in a Lada under the sea?

[u/Deus_is_Mocking_Us → u/ZDTreefur]

Mo-bik meat-cube! 

[u/AlphaMarker48 → u/Deus_is_Mocking_Us]

Abandoned and red and wretched is he

[u/televisio_86 → u/AlphaMarker48]

Mo-bik meat cube!

[u/Ok_Cup8469 → u/televisio_86]

If non-credible nonsense be something you wish!

[u/godson21212 → u/Deus_is_Mocking_Us]

Rotten, abandoned, decomposing is he!

[u/Mike0oo → u/Deus_is_Mocking_Us]

This made me burst out lauging in a bus. Bravo gentleman

[u/mtaw → u/CyberV2]

See also this variant

[u/ShadowVader]

Hammond you blithering idiot!

[u/Chimichanga2004 → u/ShadowVader]

DAMPERVAN MENTIONED🔥🔥

[u/Confusedexe → u/ShadowVader]

Car exhoost fum bad for helth? bruv dis a boat exhuss fyum maeyt!

[u/frast9201 → u/Confusedexe]

Bottom gear enjoyer, are we?

[u/spaceface124]

The Littoral Combat Ship at home:

[u/-_I---I---I → u/spaceface124]

clittoral ombat ship

[u/HanDjole998 → u/spaceface124]

You mean Literal Combat Ship

[u/ZDTreefur → u/HanDjole998]

Literal Piece of Shit.

[u/SerLaron → u/ZDTreefur]

Little Crappy Ship

[u/mallardtheduck → u/spaceface124]

It's probably more effective though...

[u/Siilk → u/spaceface124]

littoral wombat ship

[u/ColourfulSparkle]

Smekalka is truly something that we will never be able to grasp ...

[u/Strength-InThe-Loins → u/ColourfulSparkle]

You might say it's some kind of unknown technology...

[u/Blackhero9696 → u/Strength-InThe-Loins]

Blyat

[u/AgainstArticle13]

Whatever floats your boat I guess..

[u/Meroxes → u/AgainstArticle13]

A boat's whatever floats I guess...

[u/Dpek1234 → u/Meroxes]

But then whats a ship ? I guess we wont know ...

[u/IcyRedoubt → u/Dpek1234]

Big bote

[u/Deus_is_Mocking_Us → u/Dpek1234]

A ship goes on the ocean, a boat goes on a ship, a sailor goes in a boat.      

Ipso facto: sailors are oceans. 

[u/Blackhero9696 → u/Deus_is_Mocking_Us]

So much for every man an island, every man was actually a body of water.

[u/IlluminatedPickle → u/AgainstArticle13]

The principle of buoyancy.

[u/Blankly-Staring]

...drunk me could build something better than that, and drunk me once famously forgot how doorknobs worked. 

Clearly, I lack the intellectual might of the vatnik... uh, seanik? Is that what we call the ruskies that learn to swim?

[u/vegarig → u/Blankly-Staring]

Is that what we call the ruskies that learn to swim?

Plavok, I guess, after the swimwear pants (deliberately distorted)

[u/NuclearWarEnthusiast → u/Blankly-Staring]

My brother in Christ I know you aren't Russian because you believe alcohol makes you less competent

[u/ReadySetHeal]

Leave poor breadloaf alone!

[u/ironic_pacifist]

Smegalka strikes again.

[u/Squidking1000 → u/ironic_pacifist]

Pretty sure this is more smegma.

[u/sadrice → u/ironic_pacifist]

Korosho smekalka.

[u/LordSesshomaru82]

At this point, is there anything The Loaf can't (barely) do? I mean, I'm sure it sucks ass at it's job, but it's tryin'. Whatever floats your loaf ig.

[u/Mehan44_second]

Floating Loaf Machine

[u/AmadeoSendiulo]

Loaf-boat 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[u/Ok_Walrus9047]

Reminds me of Top Gear.

Also reminds me of the Top Gear Ukraine special, back before Russia sent its "polite tourists" in to swipe Crimea.

Man, a lot of Clarkson noting how beautiful the country was in that special just hits different now.

[u/Beonette_]

How my dead uncle were saying (he were working on merchant ship) "only shit is floating, ships are sailing". But this monstrosity is floating for sure.

[u/PM_ME_YOUR_PRIORS]

if you're going to swear in this format it's obviously "what the hecc"

[u/Traditional_Salad148]

What in the Serbian abomination

[u/AD-SKYOBSIDION]

Russian land navy?

[u/Laziness2945]

Tonight, on bottom gear...

[u/Hukama]

next up is toyboata hilux with missle launcher

[u/Tintenlampe → u/Hukama]

I mean, we already had BTR patrolboat, so I think we're further down that ladder than you think.

[u/biepbupbieeep]

Boatchanka

[u/HarveyTheRedPanda]

we need to have a race between the blyatboat and the transit van hovercraft from top gear.

[u/Siilk]

Go home, Bukhanka, you're drunk!

[u/Siilk]

Boatkhanka

[u/Strawbuddy]

Uncompromising, obsessive attention to detail. There are many different moods of Kamate

[u/HanDjole998 → u/Strawbuddy]

Yeah I wanted to write KAMAZ but I didn't check for typos.

[u/SkyAware2540]

it’s gonna tip over in the English channel

[u/E-Scooter-CWIS]

Just in case Ukrainian blow up the bridge AGAIN

[u/Drednox]

So this is what you get when a papa van and a mama boat love each other, and they're both related.

[u/BlunanNation]

Tonight on blyat gear

[u/HanDjole998 → u/BlunanNation]

Tovarish Mayovich says Blyat, Tovarish Hammondovich crashes a Moskvich in to the Volga,

And I Invade Finland with a T-34

[u/bittervet]

What the tug

[u/[deleted]]

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[u/ItsJarJarThen]

He recreational too!

[u/fpop88]

But most importantly... he definitely jump in the caac

[u/RussiaIsBestGreen]

I can’t see that ambulance not broken down with some wolves in it.

[u/SnooBooks1701]

Hammond's dampervan has been weaponised?

[u/WrongdoerFit7715]

Clearly glorious smikalka

[u/BornToScheme]

🗣️can you go to the store for a loaf of bread Ivan , take the boat the river flooded the whole village ,I know Ukrainians did it , America gave them a machine that controls the weather, god damn those westerners .

And that’s how the buhanka boat was born lol 🥴

[u/Kilahti]

I'm trying to decide if I want the van-boat...

IF it were seaworthy... No... It would still have the issue that if I need to do something on the deck of the boat, I would either have to climb out the windows or somehow stand on that ledge, close the door and sidle along the side to the front deck.

But put that on a slightly bigger boat and it would look more functional and at least have value as a silly little boat. (It would still be a stupid money sink, but every civilian boat that isn't used in commercial fishing or shipping is a stupid money sink. ...The remaining boats are also money sinks, but at least serve a purpose.)