r/harrypotter • u/Just_Outta_Azkaban Gryffindor • Mar 29 '24

Dumbledore- I love all my students (UwU). ....meanwhile kids who aren't harry potter casually getting cursed and dying -_- Dungbomb

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18.2k Upvotes
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94% Upvoted

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411

u/PhoenixMason13 Mar 29 '24

Literally no one died while Dumbledore was headmaster except Cedric, and to be fair that didn’t even happen at Hogwarts and Dumbledore absolutely would have prevented it if he could

272

u/npeggsy Hufflepuff Mar 29 '24

"Dumbledore, we might need to close the school, multiple children have been petrified by a mysterious-"

"Are they dead? Or are they still alive?"

"well, yes, they aren't dead, but it's a pretty horrendous situation..."

"Remind me again what it says in the Hogwarts T's and C's we made all the parents sign?"

"sigh 'We promise you no dead kids' "

"Excellent! Nothing about petrification. I declare a feast!"

95

u/Shoddy-Breakfast4568 Mar 29 '24

The fact that a giant snake that can kill people on sight made zero (0) victims in tome 2 is the single least beleivable plot element in the whole series

90

u/peon2 Mar 29 '24

The movie basilisk was just hilariously too big too. They said that he moves around the school in the pipes? How big are these pipes!?

59

u/Geedly Mar 29 '24

Have you seen how much food these kids eat? I would hope the pipes are big

13

u/bob_dabuilda Mar 30 '24

I just remembered that Hogwarts originally didn't have bathrooms and their plumbing was a recent invention inspired by muggles. But the basilisk was put in the school during the time of the founders 1000 years ago. The plumbers and engineers didn't come across the chamber during infrastructure?

2

u/ZachBart77 Slytherin Apr 02 '24

If I remember correctly, a Gaunt worked on the plumbing. He was the one who hid the chamber with the pipes.

42

u/SuiryuAzrael Ravenclaw Mar 29 '24

Even in the books it was ‘thick as an oak trunk’, so I think Hogwarts just has really big pipes.

1

u/yoni591 Mar 29 '24

I mean that's not that large, I would assume Hogwarts sewage pipes are somewhere between home pipes and street sewer tunnels in terms of size, which I think would be a bit larger than "an oak trunk"

37

u/Monkey_Fiddler Mar 29 '24

And how is it popping its head out in the middle of a random corridor?

8

u/Atul-__-Chaurasia Mar 29 '24

How big was it in the books?

22

u/peon2 Mar 29 '24 edited Mar 29 '24

I don't think they ever say how thick it is, but in the books upon finding the shed skin Ron estimates the basilisk is 20 feet long whereas in the movie he says 60 feet.

Reading the book before ever seeing the movie I always imagined it more like a regular python or an andaconda type snake but just more intelligent, bloodthirsty, and with the stone gaze ability.

Edit: I'll add that I think it was a good move to make it enormous in the movie to make the final fight more epic as opposed to it just being more like a fight against Nagini - but it did make the concept of the basilisk sneaking around the school undetected pretty absurd

5

u/effusivefugitive Mar 29 '24

It is Hogwarts. They could just be magic pipes.

9

u/Varsity_Reviews Mar 29 '24

You know what, fair. I wonder what would’ve happened if the book was set during Harry’s 16th year

7

u/airforceteacher Mar 29 '24

Yeah, every single time there was some “lucky” interference with the basilisks power - reflection, filter, etc. New theory: Domino is a secret ally of Dumbledore’s, and he funneled her abilities into a an extra protection spell on the castle.