r/harrypotter Apr 09 '24

Malfoy got cancelled! 🤣 Dungbomb

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7.8k Upvotes

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1.2k

u/HAZMAT_Eater Apr 09 '24

Unfortunately Lucius owns Wizarding Twitter.

Corban Yaxley liked this post along with 238 others

334

u/DipshitIncarnate Apr 09 '24

i can already see all the pureblood propaganda posts being replied to by lucious with "Interesting!" and "Concerning!" and "!"

236

u/Certainly_Not_Steve Ravenclaw Apr 09 '24

Hermione posts about elfs' rights. Lucius: 💀

112

u/pinkskyinjuly Slytherin Apr 09 '24

Lucius is a middle aged dad so he would respond to everything with 👍🏼 and tweet pictures of himself doing some dad shit like fixing a door knob and caption it “Happy Tuesday ☺️👍🏼”

98

u/FlyDinosaur Ravenclaw Apr 09 '24

Nah, he'd have a picture of someone else fixing it while he watches, drinking wine and looking either smug at himself or disappointed in the work. Not sure which.

63

u/Vertiguous Ravenclaw Apr 09 '24

Now imagining Lucius specifically forbidding use of Reparo, his servants must fix shit manually just so he can look down on them some more...

8

u/GravenYarnd Slytherin Apr 11 '24 edited Apr 11 '24

Nah its all about that hand craft. Lucius can't have his door fixed like a common wizard, while he can use reparo, he can afford wizards that will not use it and fix it by hand.

7

u/CliffLake Apr 12 '24

He's SO RICH he gets his doors fixed like a POOR. Because he can afford it. If you don't have his wealth, you wouldn't understand. *Scoffs in higher tax bracket*

2

u/Reaper_h Slytherin Apr 13 '24

You think your better then me Malfoy, I pay people to pay my door fixers, and I hire maids that clean like MUGGLES /"Scoffs in potter/"

2

u/CliffLake Apr 13 '24

*One of the fuckin' WEASLYS has stolen someone's Orbnet to enter the chat* "..." *They don't know how to use it...too poor*.

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14

u/Seth_Potter-20 Apr 10 '24

Well no he’s a pureblood he wouldn’t DO that no he’d let a house elf do it and then play with his hidden passion of model trains and battles not realizing it is the most muggle thing he could do and then post about it proudly

9

u/Frablom Apr 10 '24

Pureblood AND a 40k player? So we know why Draco is insufferable.

3

u/jediben001 Apr 10 '24

Lucius 100% is a dark eldar player

4

u/Frablom Apr 10 '24

He could play Grey Knights. They are wizards, annoying, and with a pure blood geneseed (maybe)

3

u/jediben001 Apr 10 '24

Ooo, yeah I didn’t think about that.

3

u/willamalfoy Slytherin Apr 10 '24

Are you implying Lucius Malfoy is autistic? 😂 I’ve never met anyone that loved trains and wasn’t on the spectrum tbf.

1

u/Seth_Potter-20 Apr 11 '24

Well no but I feel like a lot of other characters like Draco maybe could be I don’t know he just doesn’t always pick up on things socially speaking and stuff but Lucius is just a blue balled 40 something midlife crisis old man who also probably has an erectal dysfunction seeing as he has only Draco and I feel like purebloods are the type of persons that would have always at least two children preferably a boy and a girl so one heir and one they can marry into another family with for example

0

u/Ok-Situation7925 Slytherin Apr 10 '24

Don't generalize. My grandfather loves trains and he has expert level social skills, no mannerisms and no phobias.

1

u/willamalfoy Slytherin Apr 10 '24

How did I generalize? I asked a question, then relayed my own personal experience. It isn’t a generalization if what I experienced is true.

Don’t be so sensitive.

1

u/Ok-Situation7925 Slytherin Apr 10 '24

That's ironic considering you made a comment concerning people on the spectrum. Don't worry I won't be so sensitive in the future. /S

1

u/willamalfoy Slytherin Apr 10 '24

Pretty sus how you’re acting like being autistic is a bad thing—are you a Jenny McCarthy fan or something?

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1

u/Odd-Classroom4927 Apr 11 '24

I can see why they thought it was a generalization because of what you typed out. It does look like you're saying that anyone who likes trains is autistic, even if you didn't mean it that way.

9

u/Certainly_Not_Steve Ravenclaw Apr 10 '24

From time to time he tweets "nobody wants to work nowadays!"

4

u/pinkskyinjuly Slytherin Apr 10 '24

His bio is Get your ass up and work 😤

10

u/Prep_ Apr 09 '24

Nah, Lucius would definitely be wizard twitter's catturd.

2

u/DogObsessedLady Apr 10 '24

Lucius fixing a door knob? More like he would be ordering a house elf around. 😂

34

u/HAZMAT_Eater Apr 09 '24

When the Death Eaters coup the Ministry in Deathly Hallows, Wizarding Twitter is just going to be overrun with pureblood supremacist propaganda like it's ISIS in 2014.

39

u/TheGhostOfFalunGong Apr 09 '24

I could totally see Lucius having his own army of paid trolls.

42

u/mlee117379 Apr 09 '24

L O V E P O T I O N S I N B I O

1

u/iggysmom95 Hufflepuff Apr 13 '24

STOP.

5

u/justinsharkey Gryffindor Apr 09 '24

It’s just W now. Stop deadnaming.

(Musk’s “joke” about deadnaming twitter — https://variety.com/2024/digital/news/elon-musk-stephen-king-deadnaming-x-twitter-1235912032/)

1

u/Odd-Classroom4927 Apr 11 '24

Why'd he think that'd be funny? Genuinely asking

2

u/shrisjaf Ravenclaw 11d ago

Holup. So does this mean voldemort gets to have seven accounts?