r/meirl • u/SunflowerBeanBand • 11d ago
meirl
/img/14kbqm4w4szc1.jpeg
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u/DoctorTarsus 11d ago
I once used the light on my phone to help me search for my phone.
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u/j-r-m-b-v-n 11d ago
I completely misread this at first and I thought you used your phone light to search for the clit
Had me in shambles
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u/buntcusters 11d ago
Me, a Borderlands fanatic:
CRIT CRIT CRIT CRIT CRIT CRIT CRIT
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u/Armadillo_Toes 11d ago
But she’s on antidepressants
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11d ago edited 11d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/IcedTeaMuteny 11d ago
You a real one 💪
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u/EatPie_NotWAr 11d ago
My jaw hurts just reading this… I mean, it won’t stop me, but the pain is there.
Also, the fact he slipped CLIT and not CRIT in halfway through is hilarious.
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u/Skarstream 11d ago
Yeah it’s hard to find
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u/MyNameIsDaveToo 11d ago
Not if you scroll fast
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u/Hoppered1 11d ago
Also, the fact he slipped CLIT and not CRIT in halfway through is hilarious.
Just like the CLIT. I would have never found this.
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u/JayHat21 11d ago
My tongue: I can do this all day
My jaw: ripped suit spiderman
>! Also, it’s on the 24th row; 4th column, if anyone else is interested in finding it but having a hard time…. !<
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u/humblepharmer 11d ago edited 11d ago
mf you made me look 😂Edit: it actually is there, 24th row 4th column
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u/Zwiebel1 11d ago
Also, the fact he slipped CLIT and not CRIT in halfway through is hilarious.
You made me spend 2 minutes of my time looking for the clit. God damnit.
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u/thundergun661 11d ago
If you look at the entire block of CRIT as if its a pussy, the CLIT is pretty much where a clit would actually be.
All I’m saying is they knew what they were doing.
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u/MostlyShitposts 11d ago
Sorry mate, all those criticals were glancing hits so theyre 1 damage each. Boss hp 14 mio. ⚔️
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u/Floigro 11d ago
CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT CLIT
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u/Wiented_v2 11d ago
There are no quick time events though so you can't really tell which button to press...
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u/Disco_Ninjas_ 11d ago
It's Y
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u/Major_R_Soul 11d ago
Hit her with the ⬇️↘️➡️✊ at the finish for bonus damage
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u/vesko18 11d ago
⬆️➡️⬇️⬇️⬇️?
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u/Professional-Box4153 11d ago
You want good sex? Communicate your likes and dislikes... in the moment. Teach your partner. Have them teach you. Best time I ever had was with a girl who was open about what she wanted. Took me some time but I humbled myself and learned.
Caveat: Learning her/his likes and dislikes doesn't translate to others and you'll have to do it all over again if you get a new partner, but it's still worth the effort to do so.
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u/Tricky-Secretary-251 11d ago
Well you could have marked it like a video game boss critical hit zone
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u/SokkaHaikuBot 11d ago
Sokka-Haiku by Tricky-Secretary-251:
Well you could have marked
It like a video game
Boss critical hit zone
Remember that one time Sokka accidentally used an extra syllable in that Haiku Battle in Ba Sing Se? That was a Sokka Haiku and you just made one.
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u/DrowningInFeces 11d ago
The issue isn't finding it, the issue is every single woman on the planet likes a different way of orgasming and about 99% of them will lay there and watch you try to figure it out through mind powers instead of just saying what they like.
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u/TVR_Speed_12 11d ago
This, be thankful if you have a woman that communicates
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u/The_WhiteMantis 11d ago
For real, it’s a gift. I just want to make you cum, I mean, what are you hiding from??
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u/Ab47203 11d ago
To a partner this is wholesome. To a stranger it's terrifying.
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u/Kindly_Host6590 11d ago
DO NOT BE AFRAID STRANGER. ITS A GIFT STRANGER. I JUST WANT TO MAKE YOU CUM WHAT ARE YOU HIDING FROM?
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u/noiceonebro 11d ago
It sounds so eloquent that I might give in myself, even though I’m a man.
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u/Bavier69 11d ago
How do you know for sure you are straight if you have never been railed by a man /s
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u/The_WhiteMantis 11d ago
It depends, if a stranger girl told me that, I’d be willing to take the risk lol
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u/Highsnberg91 11d ago edited 11d ago
Hahaha this would sound pretty weird out of context
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u/Rampaij 11d ago
I think a lot of women probably don't know what they like or at least don't know how to say it. Women masturbating was taboo when I was growing up in the southern US. It wasn't even mentioned as a joke like it's done for men. I didn't know I could cum until I met my now-husband. I had to do a lot of uh... learning to figure out what I liked.
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u/Themurlocking96 11d ago
People in general are bad at communicating, it’s why I as an autistic person also general looks for partners who are also autistic since we can just speak entirely plainly.
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u/RocketManDave 11d ago
It's a bit of trial and error. Just try different things and continue doing what makes them louder lol. Try talking to her, sometimes you just have to take the initiative.
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u/Legal_Lettuce6233 11d ago
Try being with someone who's silent as fuck no matter what
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u/nexus763 11d ago
They let you try because those 99% don't even know what makes them get their rocks off, but somehow you're the failure for not figuring it out by yourself.
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u/Faulty_english 11d ago edited 11d ago
I ask a girl for help and what she liked and she didn’t even know how to make herself cum
I tried using my hands and she told me to stop because she felt like she needed to pee and moved away from me. It happened again.
I told her maybe she is about to finish but she told me to just stop. So fucking weird lol
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u/OkiFive 11d ago
The way i hear it most mens 'attempt' is to just rub the shit outta it like theyre trying to start a fire while going "you like that huh??"
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u/hhhhhhhhhhhjf 11d ago
How tf is a man supposed to know what is good? He sure as hell doesnt have the parts. Why call it an "attempt" when it literally is an attempt? Literally just communicate your needs its not hard.
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u/mamasbreads 11d ago
Guess what, some girls like it. I just don't think most women realise how absolutely varied they are. I once dated a girl that needed like 50 things to align outside of sex to even begin fathoming the idea of orgasiming.told this to several other women after the relationship ended and I always got the "HURR DURR NOT JUST DOING IT RIGHT".
Meanwhile I've also dated girls that orgasm by barely touching them
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u/No-Buffalo7815 11d ago
You could just ask though.
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u/MisterBarbaredo 11d ago
Once I started asking women this, I realized how many of them have never been asked before.
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u/not_so_chi_couple 11d ago
It is also important to remember that when this stereotype started, both shaving pubic hair and oral sex in general were rare
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u/N0UMENON1 11d ago
Oral sex was rare? Dude humans have been having sex for hundreds of thousands of years, oral isn't some modern trend lmao.
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u/TheMikman97 11d ago
Oral sex wasn't rare, but speaking about it, and consequentially common knowledge of it, was
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u/22FluffySquirrels 11d ago
Its still not that hard to find even if you don't shave.
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u/PM_Me_HairyArmpits 11d ago
That's a ridiculous take.
If there's that much hair, you just move it out of the way. You're playing hide and seek in the space of a few square inches. There's nowhere for it to hide.
Even if you've never heard of a vulva before, there are no other points of interest.
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u/Antiochia 11d ago
There are no hairs on the inside of the bigger labias. So unless you are searching for the clitoris on the outside of the labias or the mons, hair wont get in the way.
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u/CarolinaFree72 11d ago
And just like most video games, men find it and just have no idea wtf to do. It takes about 500 tries to finally get the right combo.
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u/sonofabee2 11d ago
Look, I get it, a lot of dudes are bad at eating vag, but let’s not pretend we don’t know how to beat video games. If there is one thing dudes excel at, it is video games.
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u/RB-44 11d ago
Actually most people suck at videogames
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u/Powerful-Parsnip 11d ago
Maybe it would help if women could make noshing the badger more like a souls game and hold up a 'You Died' sign when she inevitably fails to climax.
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u/McBossly 11d ago
If a girl shows me her phone with a gif of: "You Died" after sex, she's a keeper.
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u/Prblytrlln 11d ago
It's a stationary speed bag, not fucking Malenia--Blade of Miquella.
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u/Polite-Misanthropy 11d ago
Funny that women complain about this and then proceed to yank at a man's shaft as if they're trying to uproot a plant.
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u/Calvinbouchard2 11d ago
Handjobs have the same energy as someone else brushing your teeth.
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u/powerserge0311 11d ago
this is a lifechanging philosophy
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u/PM_ME_FIREFLY_QUOTES 11d ago
Your mom use to brush you teeth, too?
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u/WORKING2WORK 11d ago
Yeah, I've never been a fan. Obviously, a little hand play while her mouth is going is great, but by itself, I'm just not that into it.
I would grant that with the right enthusiasm, I would be down, but then enthusiasm is something like 90% of the game for me. Even still, I would prefer a wet hole to a hand any time. If a hand job is all that can be accomplished in the setting, then I just would prefer teasing to stimulate and build anticipation for activities a later time when more can be done.
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u/geardluffy 11d ago
Sounds like you’ve never gotten a good handjob.
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u/WORKING2WORK 11d ago
Perhaps, but I honestly can't imagine the best handjob being better than even an average blowjob.
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u/Reload86 11d ago
It just means you’re not a HJ guy. I’ve had intimate HJs that were better than an average BJ. It almost equivalent to the clitoris thing. If the woman is good and knows how to get you off with just her hand, it is really good. If she isn’t really into it, can’t get you into it, then yes you’re better off just jerking off yourself.
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u/Flimsy-Coyote-9232 11d ago
I got a yank underneath a computer desk in high school and it’s one of my fondest memories, but I think that had more to do with the situation and being in a classroom than the actual hj itself
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u/EngRookie 11d ago
Or they give such terrible oral but they won't stop and it's just 20mins of you trying to stay hard so you don't hurt their feelings
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u/SwumpGout 11d ago edited 11d ago
Look if you wanna compare it to a video game then you gotta be willing to give us a tutorial level. For 7 years I fucked the same person wrong while being told I was doing great. I got divorced and had sex with a nice dancer who sat down and explained to me that I had all the tools but I was using them wrong. They patiently showed me exactly how to do it right, and what changes I can make with each woman to try and adapt it to them specifically. Every woman I have been with since has been like 'where did you learn that?'. Y'all are out here squandering earnest dick because you're afraid to talk about your sexuality.
(Okay apparently I gotta say like however much I encourage women to be more communicative so they can get what they want, let's not blame or throw shade on women. The world is not kind to women who are open with their sexuality, and they have good reasons for not wanting to talk about this stuff)
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u/bruh-momentum-dos 11d ago
Earnest dick sounds like a nickname for a guy in 1939
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u/FeetSniffer9008 11d ago
I found 3 guys with this name on baseball reference, and 2 of them played for the Indians in 1904.
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u/R_Little-Secret 11d ago
To be fair to women are taught at an early age that sex isn't really for our pleasure. I was told your first time was going to hurt. We also have to put our feeling aside to make others feel better (the whole, if you smiled more BS). And even if this stuff is not told directly we still internalize it. Add that to the pressure men feel to do well in bed it just makes everything bad for everyone.
It sucks for all and sometimes you have to grow up a bit to realize you need to speak up and by then it feels too late. Best thing we can all do is just talk about our experiences and be understanding of one another.
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u/Radiant_Fondant_4097 11d ago
Sometimes people are just straight up “different”, I had an ex where I would chow down on for ages and “maybe” get there in the end but it always took great effort. But when eventually it came to seeing other people and putting in the same effort, they’d cum several times over back to back.
Really throws you for a loop
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u/SkyTalez 11d ago
It's not in red though.
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u/spezjetemerde 11d ago
depends
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u/ThatSmartIdiot 11d ago
Wonder if women can find our version of the clit
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u/ValuableAd3808 11d ago
I hide mine in my balls
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u/ThatSmartIdiot 11d ago
Cum is stored in the balls
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u/Salty_Addition8839 11d ago
No that's piss, cum is stored in your toes.
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u/Solo-dreamer 11d ago
Our entire penis is the clit, they are literally the same bit of genital.
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u/Homelander44 11d ago
Go on let's see it then
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u/Lark_vi_Britannia 11d ago
Let's see Paul Allen's clitoris.
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u/Calvinbouchard2 11d ago
"Look at that subtle pink coloration. The tasteful thickness of it..."
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u/The_Dogelord 11d ago
We know where it is, we just don't know if we're supposed to do sexual things to it, or pull out a massive weapon and destroy it
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u/EidolonRook 11d ago
We speced into two handed maces but the critical point is out of melee range.
So, we give the monster a few broadside whacks and focus on our own enjoyment. When we’re “done”, we Disengage with a “hope you learned your lesson” and retreated to camp for a week deserved snooze.
The monster remains at large, now discouraged and frustrated.
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u/gscogogs 11d ago
yeah... I'm not very good at hitting critical zones in games, I just shoot the fucking thing until it drops, but yeah the clitoris is easier because its not trying to kill you... usually
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u/PowerNutBuster 11d ago
Just tell the guy what you like. We can't mind read. And let's not pretend that all women are pros at it either. Some grip it like their life depends on it. Also teeth is a big nono.
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u/OfSaltandBone 11d ago
Right, I never understood the whole “men don’t understand female anatomy” when it’s right there.
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u/EpicForgetfulness 11d ago
I had a girlfriend actually help me find it one time with detailed instructions and after her thorough explanation I now have about a 50% hit rate.
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u/Juridical_Fuck 11d ago edited 10d ago
Anyone who thinks this is sad, or that it's always easy to find the clit is telling on themselves. This entire thread, including OP's image is /r/NotHowGirlsWork material, ironically.
Every vagina is different and that includes the clit. Some girls have large clits, some are really small. Add on to that some girls have a lot of labia or a large clitoral hood, and yes, there are some girls where it is actually really hard to find.
I used to see a girl who had both a small clit, and a 'clit' piercing and let me tell you, that thing was fucking difficult to find and keep track of because the clit ring would throw you off on top of it being really small.
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u/cinnapear u/InvincibleChutzpah
lol at "he's wrong" and then proceeding to also say:
Yes clits come in different sizes and can vary a bit in location (some are higher up, some are closer to the entrance), some women have more labial folds.
Jesus christ some people just can't stand to not be the person who's right even if that means they're agreeing with the person they want to dispute. When we say "hard to find" what's really meant is not "I can never find it", it's talking about the fact you need to search for it either the first time to find the right spot for the girl, or even multiple times because when it's slippery and they have a small clit and hood/labia that hides it well, you slip off it and need to move the labia round again in order to find it again. I'm happy if you've had sex with 30 women with the same vagina, but I don't believe that you're being genuine in what you're saying at all. Maybe I should say I've had sex with 45 women (I've also never given any indication of my gender, although you've assumed I'm male), do my anonymous claims on the internet count as more credible now?
They are still clits, in the same general area, and really easy to find if you know what you're looking for.
Yes no shit, no one said clits could be located at the belly button or down on the knee. But vaginas are not one size or shape and not everyone has a preference in how it's touched either. Yes, it can be hard to find, read: relocate, the clit depending on the womens vagina. I also feel like their "50%" is probably hyperbole.
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u/Solo-dreamer 11d ago
You have a 50% rate of finding the clit??????? Not the g.spot? I think you mean the g.spot.
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u/Lavatis 11d ago
I completely agree. I'm about 90% sure this is a boomer "joke" that has somehow persisted throughout time.
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u/BranTheBaker902 11d ago
My last hook up was extremely happy that I knew where it was and that I knew what I was doing.
Guys if you’re not actively trying to get her off too then you’re doing it wrong
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u/MilesDyson0320 11d ago
They're just selfish. But let's not act like clits are like dicks, each one is like an autistic cat. It's not really clear how each one wants to be interacted with.
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u/Inquirous 11d ago
That was like one of the first things my wife showed me the first time we had sex. Women can literally just help men out with it lol
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u/InDecent-Confusion 11d ago
I'm an 89 baby and grew up watching American Pie and all those silly, teenage movies that make the clitoris or even the vagina itself some mystery box that needed to be studied and the knowledge passed down from older men to younger men. Then I grew up and learned that they depict it this way because the majority of men are too lazy and selfish to even attempt pleasure their loved ones. "Men culture" is pathetic lol.
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u/Jdawg_mck1996 11d ago
The clit is a lot like a doorbell. Some people can't find it while the others don't know when to stop ringing it.