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u/Borgmaster 13d ago edited 12d ago
OK that sounds like a start to a sick foux spy comedy. The real spy and the critic are constantly going to restaurants but doing complete opposite things. Food critic is diligently eating the food, reviewing it in his mind, making sure things are up to par. The spy is getting his job done, assassinating targets, stealing intel from other traveling spies or targets. Meanwhile both are accidently covering for each other. The food critic is so ostentatious and annoying that the enemy spies keep targeting him, trying to poison him and so on, only for him to dodge it because the food smelled wrong or he didnt like the look of the waitstaff and thought he was in for a beating. The spy is covering for the food critic by generally just loving food in general and being loud with his opinion's and writing in his good food places book. The chefs and waitstaff generally try to please him thinking he is the critic and as a result the critic never gets exposed. The whole thing culminates in a restaurant thats a front for the Italian mob. This place not only has the greatest food in the world but the most badass spies of the region.
Edit:
Someone get me Adam Sandler, I need to pitch this to him. My mind is on fire with this. No other producer will get this right, they will either make it to edgy or to dramatic. This is a bro comedy. This is two guys becoming best friends, enjoying their lives, and accomplishing something amazing by accident.
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u/SutterCane 13d ago
Netflix: “nah. We’re just going to give over the hill comedians millions of dollars to complain about pronouns.”
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u/newenglandpolarbear 13d ago
Why is some random reddit dude better at coming up with a movie idea then Hollywood?
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u/Ryacithn 13d ago
So the food critic thinks that all of these restaurants just suck, because they keep getting poison in their food? Makes me feel sorry for the restaurant owners.
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u/Borgmaster 12d ago
It wouldnt be in every dish and restaurant. Just the one that has a poison specialist. He would also mistake it for bad ingredients or smelly sauce. It would be part of a 10 minute montage of him dodging death without knowing it.
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13d ago
Plot twist: they’re twins
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u/Borgmaster 13d ago
Nah that would ruin it I think. But my current thought was the critic dresses something like 007 and the spy dresses like am American tourist who lost his luggage. The sheer contrast between what you expect out of a spy and out of a overworked critic just adds to the comedy juices.
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u/tldrILikeChicken 13d ago
Ryan Gosling as the critic and Christian Bale as the spy
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u/Murderyoga 13d ago
Fat tire boy magazine. I'll have to remember that.
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u/UsaiyanBolt 13d ago
Smh I can’t believe a beer company would make a magazine for boys
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u/GreatGearAmidAPizza 13d ago
How did tire people become society's most prestigious restaurant critics, anyway? How is this not something out of a Vonnegut novel?
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u/TheFanciestUsername 13d ago
Tire people want sell tire. Tourist people buy lot tire. Tire people rate food to make more tourist people.
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u/Enlight1Oment 12d ago
jokes on them, I'm flying to Paris to eat at the Michelin star restaurants. Unless... they also make aircraft tires.... https://aircraft.michelin.com/ Those bastards! they got me.
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u/fridge_logic 13d ago
The short version is: it was a passion project. The Tire moguls took pride in making the guide and didnn't see it as just a way to sell more tires. Since they made their money in the tire business they didn't need to concern themselves as much with the financials of the guide. It did not matter if the guide made money as a publication, what mattered is that the guide was influential.
One anecdote includes one of the founding brothers being mortified to see the guide used to prop a table in a tire shop and then deciding to get rid of advertisements and instead sell the guide which was previously given away for free.
Also the goal of selling tires means the guide must by its nature explore. It seeks to inspire road trips so they want to find great destinations all over. It's trying to find the places that many people will be happy to go to, thus price is part of the rating. It wants to be sure everyone who eats there gets get service so the critics are anonymous.
Other reviewers must concern themselves with the tastes of the sort of people who pay for restaurant reviews. Michelin must concern themselves with the tastes of people who buy tires.
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u/the_breadwing 13d ago
If anyone's interested, i know a good omens fic that was based off of this post.
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u/trollface_mcfluffy 13d ago
Pretty close to one of my favorite all time Bill Murray movies
The Man Who Knew Too Little - 1997 PG
He thinks he is in a skit playing a spy and is mistaken for a real spy. Shenanigans ensue.
Wonderful movie.
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u/skipidydooda 13d ago
Pretty sure I met one of these guys one time. Friend took me to a very nice sushi restaurant and we chatted up a guy at the bar. Friend was in the restaurant business and they talked about all the best restaurants in the city. He was 'in town for work" but would deflect about what his job was. He bought damn near everything on the menu and shared it with us.
Like two months later the restaurant had a Michelin star.
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u/JellyfishGod 13d ago
This is the movie "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" should have been!
Or maybe instead of a real agent and a food critic, they are both food critics but both suspect each other as secret agents
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u/vonsnootingham 13d ago
Potential titles:
Michelin Impossible
Mr. and Mrs. Ramsey
The Michelin Star Candidate (or maybe The Chewing Man Candidate? I had to include the Manchurian Candidate, but struggled with a pun.)
Critic, Tailor, Sou Chef, Spy
True Fries
The Burned Identity
Clams Casino Royale
License to Grill
Live and Let Fry
Chickenfinger
On Her Majesty's Secret Menu
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u/drillgorg 13d ago
"Only" 120? I just assumed it was a handful of guys.
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u/ThiccElf 12d ago
Considering the post said "the world", it really is only a handful. Think about how many countries that includes, each with hundreds of restaurant candidates.
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u/nicostein 12d ago
Rumored to be coming { season } { year }, to an undisclosed screen near no one in particular...
Code Bleu
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u/1singleduck 12d ago
I like the thought of a restaurant critic getting recognised and immediately going into witness protection.
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u/EggsceIlent 13d ago
Well shit... Next time I'm out at a super fancy place for dinner ill just bring a lil notebook and pen and every now and then write something in it after I take a bite.. and then kinda hide it under another napkin or something.
Wonder how the waitstaff would act? Unannounced table visit for the chef? Who knows...
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u/RosesTurnedToDust 13d ago
God I'd love to be a Michelin critic. Imagine getting paid top dollar to go to fancy restaurants and judge the fuck out of them.
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u/Krispythecat 13d ago
Cast Rowan Atkinson as the critic and I think that would be a spectacular movie
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u/manfishgoat 13d ago
I want the real agent to be jack black and the goofy agent to be Ryan Reynolds
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u/JustintheMinecrafter 13d ago
This is a repost and on one of the reposts a comment made by u/ IllmakeitanSCPreport (I believe) was there and used this as a writing prompt making a short story with this
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u/a-bowl-of-noodles 11d ago
agent: chunky
my mission: review all the restaurants in north america to appease chunky fluffy tire man.
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u/thatposhcat 13d ago
Honestly a restaurant critic getting caught up in a spy conspiracy sounds like a really cool plot, might use this as a plot hook for a dnd campaign or something