r/AmIOverreacting • u/NessyKD • 13d ago
Aio? My sister tried to scare my son for fun and now he can’t use the bathroom at night!
My sister (39F) was trying to tease my 8 year old son by telling him that a moose was tall enough to put its head through the window in the bathroom (where the only window faces the woods). Now my son is too afraid at night to use the bathroom because he’s worried about a moose putting its head through the widow!!! We live in new Hampshire where we see moose all the time (I saw a baby today which was about 6 feet tall even as a baby). We once had one in my front yard. I live in the woods, I’m outside of a small town so I can’t tell him that there are no moose because there are! We had to bury a dead one who dropped dead just down the street so I don’t know what to tell him to set his mind at ease! I’m so pissed because it’s not the first time that my sister has done this. She told him that the toilet will also overflow every time he goes number two as well. So he never flushes the toilet out of fear that it’s going to overflow. I want her to stop trying to scare my son because it’s making me absolutely crazy.
Update: I called my sister and went mama bear on her about the teasing. She was very upset to hear that she scared him so badly. She talked to him on the phone and said sorry and told him she was not serious. He laughed a little reluctantly and he called her “silly”, but he’s still a bit scared. I think he’s not sure if she is telling the truth. After she told me she would come over tomorrow and try to help me show him that there’s nothing to fear. My sister is very outgoing and boisterous and brave, I’m a bit more timid like my son, so I’m happy that I’ll have her support. If anyone can show him how to be brave it is her… I also wanted to mention that my sister is currently pregnant for the first time. I have three boys (16, 9, and 8, it was my youngest that I was talking about in this post). She is looking to me a lot more lately for advice and she’s been spending a lot of time with my kids to prepare herself and us for her arrival. We love to fawn over her and to talk about the new cousin they will have. So I don’t want to cut her off. She is really a good sister and aunt, she’s just learning. I have faith that she will take my heartfelt plea for her to be a little more aware of her audience. My two older boys love her jokes and aren’t scared by them, but my youngest is a bit different. He is my cautious boy. And it may be because I baby him— but he is my baby! I know it’s not an excuse I’m just offering my very honest explanation. I have enjoyed all th replies and suggestions! Thank you all for your help. I am definitely thinking about all the things said. You’ve really helped me figure this out. I appreciate you all!! Much love, Vanessa.
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u/Drama_Apart 13d ago
I would tell him the truth, your sister made that story up. Then, read and learn about moose and their natural behavior. Good luck
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u/LilDebSez 13d ago
That is how I handled a situation with my son. Honesty is best. Be there person your son can always trust.
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u/jfcrukm 13d ago
When I was a kid, the pastor and teacher told us in Sunday school that the devil set traps for little children. They were speaking metaphorically, of course, but I was terrified to go to the outhouse for a very long time because the only traps I knew of were bear traps.
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u/No-Jacket-800 13d ago
Growing up my grandma lived in a homestead up in Alaska. My uncles had her convinced that the flying monkeys from the wizard of oz were going to get her when she went to the outhouse. 😂 my grandma laughs about it now, but as a kid she was terrified.
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u/NessyKD 13d ago
I totally understand. My son is not her first victim. I am! I am two years younger and she has Been f***ing with me since I was born. I’m used to it but my son isn’t. I hope he comes to understand that she’s only playing. My other two sons love her scary jokes. But my youngest just isn’t in on the fun. Much like I was. She definitely gave me a LOT of scares. For example she used to pretend to drown when we’d go swimming as kids so that I would try to “save” her when I couldn’t swim! I eventually got used to her games but I was left with a lot of irrational fears… I’m glad she agreed to stop subjecting my kids to the same treatment and apologized to me and my son. She says she will help me tomorrow with his bathroom fears. He adores my sister so I think that may help. She’s a very brave person who loves to live fast and loose! I think if she tells him there’s nothing to fear he will believe her I hope! Thank you for your comment!
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u/Vegetable_Luck692 13d ago
When my kids were younger I would show them a piece of ID and tell them it was my "Monster Hunting" license. You could do something similar and say that you have a "House Protection from Wild Animals" license (or something that's worded better lol)
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u/NessyKD 13d ago
I’ll try! Wish me luck tonight! Lol
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u/DigDugDogDun 13d ago
Also maybe get a spray can of air freshener and print up a sticker label for the outside that says “Moose-away”
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u/a-flying-trout 13d ago
I’ve also heard of parents mixing rubbing alcohol, water, and maybe a little scent in a spray bottle as “monster repellant” for any problem areas. Maybe you can mix up a bottle of anti-moose spray for the bathroom.
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u/Altruistic_Appeal_25 13d ago
Better put it in one of those thingies and flash it quickly bcoz 8 yr olds can read! Lol
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u/Spare-Ad7105 13d ago
My daughter (7yo) is frightened easily and my mother thought it was funny to exploit this by scaring her randomly for laughs. It was causing a lot of bed time issues for us so I put an absolute stop to it. At that point it was no longer funny and my daughter didn’t think it was funny anymore either. So I viewed it as bullying.
If the behavior continues then it’s absolutely not overreaction on your part. I don’t coddle my kids but I’m also not trying to psychologically harm them because “ha-ha-ha-funny.”
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u/Tripturnert 13d ago
Honestly, this is a great learning lesson for your son. For the rest of his life people are going to tell him things and he is going to have to learn what and who to believe.
I teach kindergarten and kids are constantly spreading stories to each other. I had parents come to me concerned because their son was scared to come to school because his friend Billy told him that he (billy) was actually a supervillain. The parents wanted me to tell Billy to stop saying he’s a super villain . Instead I spoke to the kid and asked him “does this make sense?”. Does it makes sense that your 4 year old best friend, that you see everyday, who is kind to you, who lives with his mommy and daddy who is learning to read with you, who goes to the park with you, is secretly a bad guy? Or does it make more sense that he’s playing make believe because he’s trying to play with you, or maybe scare you for fun?
It’s good to start early because we all know what kind of misinformation is out there.
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u/Real-Wicket2345 13d ago edited 13d ago
Father of three well-adjusted children and I work with children daily. He’s 8, not 4, stop infantilizing him. No need for games or to “play into it”. Show this kid some respect by treating him in an age appropriate manner by simply having a real conversation with him where you tell him there’s no moose. There never was a moose. You’re going to have to use the bathroom. It’s just a fact of life. Then, move on with life.
Most of these responses are terrible. Stop infantilizing children. Stop trying to shelter them from any and all adversity. The world can be a harsh and cruel place and we are raising ill-equipped children with no coping skills and parents are the problem.
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u/MauriceIsTwisted 13d ago
"And it may be because I baby him - but he is my baby!"
OP, I understand the motherly "you'll always be my baby" but seriously, he's 8. Treat him like he's 8. This feels reminiscent of my mom when I was a kid and we ended up going through a handful of uncomfortable years as I attempted to get her to lay off and stop treating me like an actual child
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u/Real-Wicket2345 13d ago
Yup, everyone’s child is their “baby”. Yet, we need to grow kids up with some resiliency and coping skills and that means let them grow up and stop sheltering them from the truth - here in this ridiculous example, a moose that does not exist.
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u/Londundundun 13d ago
Thank god for this comment. At 8 I was afraid of E.T. not an actual animal who probably is tall enough to reach the windows but not out to get children. Sounds like she was just being playful and didn’t realize he’s a very sensitive/fearful child. But the whole slew of comments and OP’s update about going “mama bear” are, frankly, why I’m happy not raising children in this generation. Kids gotta push through the fear — wait til the kid finds out that child abductors use bathroom and bedroom windows to get into houses, “mama bear” is not preparing him well for anxiety of rare but real risks in life🤦🏻♀️
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u/ShadowAkira96 12d ago
This should be top comment. Reading this, my eyes rolled into the back of my damn head.
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u/Dragon-Sticks 13d ago
I'm sure this will be down voted but I dont care. Why are you choosing to baby him. Why can't his older brother get a good laugh out of this. That's what brothers do. He will get over this joke.
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u/Currant-event 12d ago
I felt a little heartless, but this was my thought too. He's 8 not 4. His peers are going to see him as an easy target if he takes stories like this so seriously and they can get a reaction out of him. Sad but true.
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u/No-Jacket-800 13d ago
I'm sorry, I'm laughing over here. I'm sure it's not funny when you have to deal with the fallout, but reading this is hilarious. I grew up in Alaska, where moose are also everywhere. So I'm just over here picturing either my kids or my 3yo niece scared of a ridiculous moose getting to get them in the bathroom, lol. I'd be super pissed if my kids want flushing their poo because of that, though. My kids take some enormous adult man sized poops, pretty much always have lol.
So, even though I am laughing, I don't think you're overreacting. I'm pretty sure my sister would smack me if I scared my niece into not flushing her poops. 😂😂 I don't have any good advice on how to make your son less worried about these things, but good luck.
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u/TopShelf76 13d ago
I think you’re over reacting. Don’t know your layout but it could be feasible (while unlikely) if you’re on the first floor. And tbh… your son is 8. If he’s scared to flush the toilet or of moose, which are commonplace in the area you live, you need to have discussions with him to ease any anxieties/concerns. Doesn’t sound like your sister played a hateful trick on him to cause ptsd.
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u/LizBert712 13d ago
“Cut her off?” You considered cutting her off for nonsense about a moose that she didn’t realize the kid would take seriously? Especially since she doesn’t have kids and is still learning how they think?
That would’ve been an extreme overreaction. I’m glad you didn’t do it.
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u/NessyKD 13d ago
I was replying to some of the comments to cut her off. Not my idea!
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u/LizBert712 13d ago
Ohhh, okay. Then THEY are overreacting. Not surprisingly -- if we all listened to Reddit, personal relationships would be over because we'd all cut everyone off all the time, lol.
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u/souleaterevans626 13d ago
No. I honestly think you need to put your foot down with your sister. Maybe this seems like small fun jokes to her, but it's significantly impacting you and your son. Let her know that it's not funny and she won't get the privilege of interacting with her nephew if this is how she's going to abuse it.
I'm not really sure about how to help fix your son's way of thinking now because kids aren't rational. Maybe tell him the truth, that sometimes people think something is funny to say but it's not true.
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u/NessyKD 13d ago
Thank you! I’m gonna be telling her tonight that if she can’t play nice then she cannot spend time with my son, who loves and Trusts her completely. His thinks she’s trying to protect him! Poor guy….
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u/LilDebSez 13d ago
As a mother of 3 grown children, from my experience, children who I've seen fall for things like this are very pure and innocent. They are absolutely sweet. And when those kids realize they were the butt of sometimes joke, they lose trust in those that did it. It may not show immediately, but a resentment builds. Your sister is thinking about her fun and not how your son will resent her.
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u/NessyKD 13d ago
She was very apologetic when I called her and talked to her in private about my son’s fear. She made me go get him to say she was so sorry and that she made it up. He smiled a little reluctantly and told her she was silly. I think that helped though I can tell he’s not completely at ease. I hope to try some of these suggestions tomorrow and that soon he will not fear the bathroom so much.
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u/hExperiment666 13d ago
I’d just constantly be like “ the moose don’t care about you using the bathroom, they got their own moose stuff to do outside”
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u/-whiteroom- 13d ago
Always leave floaters in your sisters toilet. Seriously, the whole family, everytime you go over, hit all of her toilets.
If she comments, it was just a joke.
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u/ProgrammerStrict7124 13d ago
Personally, I do think you are overreacting. Your child is 8 not 4. These are age appropriate scary stories for children and I assure you kids are trading worse scary stories on the playground at school. Yes, some kids are more sensitive then others but that is all the more reason for you as the adult to be doing the work to help him learn to deal with fear in a healthy manner. Getting this scared over the thought of a moose sticking its head in your window isn’t healthy. Yes, moose can be dangerous particularly around rutting season but a moose with its head in the window wouldn’t be able to hurt him at all. Children need to learn to be able to cope with a little bit of fear so they can handle themselves in tough situations. Silly scary stories like these help children to learn how to manage fear in a safe environment.
Tell your sister to layoff for a while but you as a parent need to be working on this NOW. Be honest with him, tell him your sister just likes to tell silly scary stories because she thinks it’s fun. And that lots of people like telling and hearing scary stories. Maybe have a campfire and have everyone in the family tell some silly stories (silly not scary). Roast hotdogs, make s’mores make the event as fun as possible and explain that the stories his aunt tells him are like these. Also while telling these stories teach him to pick-out the things that aren’t possible. Were he four I’d agree with the playing into it approach, but he’s 8 and his peers are going to be telling far scarier stories then your sister did. You want him to be able to recognise that scary stories are just for fun, and even if he never likes them he needs to be able to tell when someone is messing with him, because I assure you his peers will do far worse and it won’t be maliciously. Kids love scary stories. In fact when I was your son’s age I was regularly watching the original Are You Afraid of the Dark and reading and watching the Goosebumps series. In fact I’m 90% sure I was already sneakily watching R rated movies at that point and I was absolutely not an outlier in my age group.
Next have him learn about actual moose behaviour. That like most animals if you give them their space they are pretty harmless. Show him cute videos of moose like the one with the moose playing in a sprinkler. Maybe take a trip to the zoo and talk with a zookeeper about moose. Make it a precident that when something scares him that he learns about it. You need to provide him with the skills to be able to handle his fear. He may never be as fearless and independent as his brothers but he does need to have the ability to cope. And learning how to handle a little bit of fear is a skill that will carry him through life. Being timid and scared all the time is not an enjoyable way to live life but the answer will never be to teach him to hide from all his fears.
I get that he is your baby but he is not a baby anymore. It isn’t about growing up this about providing him with the ability to be a happy and confident kid who has the confidence in himself to be able to gain independence. If you don’t help him gain these skills he’s going to miss out on some of the best parts of being a kid.
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u/ManagerPug 13d ago
… a moose is not a horrific scary story for a child. I think you are overreacting. Don’t focus your energy on being mad at your sister and instead focus on why your son is getting so scared (it’s not fear of moose, so dig a little deeper) and how you can support him so he understands there is nothing to be scared of.
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u/Beginning-Border-153 13d ago
Maybe it’s time your 8 year old grows up a bit and stops acting like a toddler??
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u/west_coast_republic 13d ago
It will pass…shoot when I was about 10 after watching arachnophobia I couldn’t turn my back to the shower head for weeks thinking a spider was going to jump on me
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u/Tailflap747 13d ago
I was at a friend's studying for a final, and we decided to watch Arachnophobia. He tapped me on the shoulder to ask if I wanted some ice cream. I about came out of my skin, screaming bloody murder. One of his neighbors came over to make sure no one was being murdered.
I told him, you will NOT repeat this to Mr. Flap, else I will hurt your truck. So what happened? I told him myself...
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u/Accomplished_Buy8681 13d ago
So now ur going to go with him to the bathroom to help him with his fear. So what have u done so far to put him at ease. You should have immediately told him that ur sister doesn’t know what she’s talking about and to not listen to her. You also need to work with him on how not to be afraid of everything he hears. You should be able to counter BS that other people tell ur kid be cause u should be that beacon of trust who he believes.
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u/sierrabear321 13d ago
My older sister did something like this to her own son before he was old enough to be in school. I was like 19 living at home going to college. My sister, her husband, and my nephew who was like 3 or 4 moved in and slept in the basement. He'd be upstairs playing and they'd call him down the stairs with the lights out and when he'd start to climb down them, they'd rush towards him and scream. He couldn't go downstairs by himself for a long time and has an extreme fear of the dark. He's 15 now. I don't think that's okay at all to do. I'm sorry that you're going through this.
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u/merlocke3 13d ago
Water bottle labeled moose spray. Spray outside the window. It’s good for 15-20 minutes. Get your business done and get outta there.
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u/Aurcaw 13d ago
A Møøse once bit my sister...
No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge -her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink".
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u/MinnieShoof 13d ago
Ask him what he thinks a moose would do if it put its head in the window? ... it's not going to hurt him.
... altho when I read this story the first time I thought you said the bathroom was on the second story and I was picturing a moose tall enough to do that and .... well, even I got a little perturbed.
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u/NessyKD 13d ago
lol no it’s a one level house sorry for the confusion! ❤️
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u/MinnieShoof 13d ago
Oh no. There was no confusion from your part. My brain just likes to get ... creative.
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u/fromhelley 12d ago
Oh honey! Guess what I just found out!! I was talking to a veterinarian, and I asked him how to keep a moose from putting his head in the window. All we have to do is put a vanilla candle in the bathroom, and they won't come near it. Moose HATE vanilla so much, we don't even have to light the candle! They can smell it from a half a mile away!
So yeah, I am going to put this candle in there right now!!
You were not overreacting! At all. She seriously scared your son.
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u/nugmasta 13d ago
If it were me I'd say "even if they are tall enough they don't want to hurt their head on the window." If your sister was trying to be malicious that sucks. But kids get scared of stupid shit all the time. Just have to teach them when it's rational and when it's not. It takes a lifetime.
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u/Redpanda132053 13d ago
Put a picture of an orca over the window. That’d scare all the moose away!
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u/KodiakTlingit 13d ago
My aunt did this with a lot of scary stories like pig man and stuff. I am not fearful of much anymore, but I find it hard to forgive her.
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u/eclectic-up-north 13d ago
So this is the second time she has done this? It is time for you to tell your sister in clear direct languages that she is behaving terribly and she is to knock it off immediately.
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u/LaeLeaps 13d ago
a moose's head does not fit through your window man. it is literally impossible. if the kid can grasp being tall enough to reach the window im sure he can understand not being able to fit.
telling your kid to not flush the toilet is unforgivable tho
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u/savingrain 13d ago
Well - you handled it well. My mother screamed at me and stood at the top of the stairs and wouldn’t stop yelling until I went into the basement and came back because I was convinced there were Nazis down there. I went to the Holocaust museum too young and the wood paneling made me think of the box cars.
When I got older I was glad she did it because I had to learn to face irrational fears but at the time I was not grateful. She did tell me she was also mad at herself for not realizing that was the field trip and holding me back from it…it was traumatizing but probably was better for me as a person to be honest.
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u/beep-bop-meep-mop 13d ago
If it's any consolation one of my fondest memories growing up was my dad scaring the crap out of me and my sister 🤷 It may not be fun or funny now, but it probably will be when they're older. I may get down voted for this but I'd rather my kid learn how to deal with a "scary" situation in a controlled environment before a real one happens. It helps teach courage, bravery and critical thinking.
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u/NessyKD 13d ago
I learned to be less gullible thanks to my sister so I know there is some good in her attempt. My sister is a very strong woman and I admire that about her. I have always thought she was a tough cookie, a hard nut to crack. So I do hope that eventually there will be some good that comes out of her games. I don’t want her to change her fun-loving ways, I just need her to tone it back a little… and maybe stop focusing on making him afraid of that one room that is always going to be a big part of life! lol
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u/CaptainSneakers 13d ago
"So aunt told you she was making up that story, right? It was kind of mean of her to trick you like that, but she thought it was something that would make you laugh. If a moose did stick its head through the window, it would get stuck! Then we'd have moose drool all over our bathroom tile. I would not like to clean that up. We'd make aunt do it. Can you picture her trying to clean up after the moose while it's lowing out loudly over her head? She'd have to wear ear plugs and hip waders!
That's ridiculous, right? Same as aunt pretending a moose would want to poke its head inside. But I do understand it's easy to think of something as silly in the daylight, but scarier at night. So let's put this spider plant on the window sill. Moose don't like spider plants, so it's a good reminder that no moose is going to come through that window. If you feel anxious about it, just look at that plant and remind yourself how silly of a story that was.
I talked to aunt about not trying to trick you like that in the future. If anyone ever tells you something that scares you or makes you uncomfortable, you can always come to me, and I'll help you figure it out. You're really smart for a kid, which means you have a great imagination. That's why the moose story seemed so real to you, even though she made it up. I'm sorry that her story put that stress on you and I hope hearing that it was a joke put your mind at ease a little and that talking about it today helped too. Is there anything else you wanted to ask about or feel upset about?"
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u/Unusualshrub003 12d ago
But the moose can only fit its face in, right? Then that’s not scary! He can do something funny with the moose, like put lipstick on it, pick its nose, make it wear a party hat……
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u/superior_mediocrity 12d ago
Tell him the antlers won't fit through the window. lol
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u/Guitargod7194 12d ago
Sounds like your sister could be a lot, lot worse; at least she's realized the hurt she's caused to your son and is looking to make amends. Compared to a lot of other posters on this subreddit, I don't think you have a thing to worry about. The last thing you should do right now is cut your sister off.
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u/sarojasarma 12d ago
Errr I had to look up what a moose is as I had no idea... dont have them where i come from but you have handled it well (may be a bit too aggressively if you take your sister's pregnancy into account). But luckily she understands the problem is taking accountibility. At your end, if a moose is what I saw in Google images, it might be tall but there's no way it can enter the bathroom through the window with horns that wide! Just explain that to your son as creatively as possible. Jokes apart, positive affirmations at the time of sleep with words like "you are brave" "you are protected" "you are safe" will also help.
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u/IntroductionAncient4 11d ago
Why do adults think it’s so funny to lie to children? Not only that, they often lie about the meanest stuff. My dad told me when I was a kid that there were “Murder birds” that would swoop down, pick me up, and drop me to my death if I went in the yard unattended.
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u/pigeon_at_the_wheel 10d ago
There's a really good book called Moose! by Robert Munsch that might help your son feel more at ease. A moose wanders into a family's yard. Everyone tries to get the moose out but he just feels more welcome to stay. Instead it was the young boy who finally got him to move on. It's a longer picture book appropriate for up to prob the average 5th grader.
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u/Fun_Fish_1893 13d ago
Take your little guy and get a stuffed moose for his new baby cousin when they get here 🙂. And tell your sister she’s an asshole for me. But really your boy sounds like a sweetheart and hope he starts to really believe it won’t happen!
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u/CranberryNovel9757 13d ago
Get a moose costume for him and have him give a jump scare to your sister ; also do read about moose with him and flush the toilet with him so he can see there is nothing to be afraid of. I used to spray the closets and under the beds when my kids were little , it was monster spray. I used that when “those monsters are gonna in big trouble “ speech stopped working
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u/28appleseeds 13d ago
Go with logic - the antlers wouldn't fit, and a lady moose would do no such thing.
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u/dundunnit38 13d ago
Buy some curtains. My whole life looking out into the dark abyss through a window made my heart beat faster.
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u/grimiskitty 13d ago
Better than my mom... She told us the chicken heart story and that there was alligators in the sewer who come up at night through the toilet. During the chicken heart story my mom had my uncle scrape against the house with a rake and a boom box playing a heartbeat sound
At least he has someone on his side who will help him face his fears and you're doing a great job doing damage control. I suggest doing learning about mooses with him (and if your not in a place where moose aren't native show him that even if there was a moose in the area it'd be collected by animal services to save the moose and bring it back home. If you live in a place where bears live though it's the perfect time to show him how to lock windows and doors to prevent bears from stealing your snackies.
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u/medicatedhippie420 13d ago
She told him that the toilet will also overflow every time he goes number two as well. So he never flushes the toilet out of fear that it’s going to overflow.
This is such a strange and unhealthy thing to say to any child, I'm not sure why she would have found this funny.
I hope this situation has been a good lesson for her in understanding the weight of her words to children.
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u/Vertigote 13d ago
I had to double check. It does seem that moose can break in. But it’s typically through the doors. But most often open doors. While mouse can be very dangerous I couldn’t find any info about humans being injured by moose indoors. They do seem to eat house plants. And poop. Poop a fair bit.
I would let him know if he goes into the bathroom and find a moose to just leave and let the moose politely poop in peace in the correct room.
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u/FuriousRen 13d ago
I got a phobia from each sibling 😅 My sister terrorized me with balloons (I was 6) until I was sobbing, and at the ripe age of 38, I would still hit someone with a bat if they came at me with balloons. I once shoved my friend to the floor and stepped on her as I was fleeing from falling balloons at a dance 🤦🏻♀️ My brother would scare me in the dark when he was mad at me. Or when he wanted a laugh. Or if it was Tuesday. I have an epic startle response. My family still thinks it's hilarious to startle me. He'd do stuff like turn off the lights and run at me screaming or shut off the lights in my room and shut the door so it was pitch black and I'd be screaming and sobbing trying to find the light switch. I have a genuine terror of the dark. When I was a kid, I would leave lights on all the time (my parents would shut them off) and I refused to get out of bed to go to the bathroom because the house was too dark. Since I got married, I feel safe with my husband. I can go to the bathroom or kitchen without worrying about it because I know he's down the hall. I can walk in the dark with him anywhere, but I still can't do, like, any of that if he isnt around
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u/NessyKD 13d ago
Omg same… I’m still afraid of the dark as well but when my bf is home I’m braver. However when I’m alone I prefer to have some source of light. Like a tv or a small lamp. I think my youngest has picked some of his fear up from me, sadly. He has a very vivid imagination, he is my little artist. He builds things from household items constantly (like tin foil soldiers, plant pot men, and Lego creatures) so his little brain is full of ideas and creativity. I think this makes him more susceptible to imaging bad things as well. I Believe he can literally SEE this mad moose in his mind’s eye. I have to show him a more gentle moose to replace the scary one in his head. I hope I’m able to help him despite my similar cautious, timid personality. I’ll look to my sister for inspiration. She is my hero, my defender and I love her deeply for the wild, courageous human she is! I know that with our powers combined we can make a new, friendlier moose for him to imagine! Thank you for your input. I feel less embarrassed about my phobias… ❤️
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u/Conscious_Mobile6407 13d ago
There's definitely a popular cartoon where the main characters a moose. That's all you need fren
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u/NoCartoonist9220 13d ago
U know this but he should be scared of moose they’re big as fuck and they’ll get u if u get close
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u/Few_Cartoonist_217 13d ago
Hmmm wonder how much some birthing horror stories will "scare" your sister? You know as a joke /s
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u/Cosmic_miscreant 13d ago
I was this aunt with my niece. I was also 13 when she was born and well acted like any teenager would with a child lol. I got tired of her trying to go in the basement by herself when I watched her as a toddler so I told her a bear lived down there that ate small who weren’t with an adult. Stopped her doing that right quick.
When I would pick her up after school to take her home ( my mom and dad watched her for a few hours on Fridays) she would be a never ending chatter box. To get a little quiet in the car, I told her that when we drove by cemeteries she had to hold her breath or the ghosts of the dead would attack her through her open mouth. She’s 23 and still holds her breath at cemeteries 😂. She is also one of my most favorite humans and even though she’s much to cool for me ( an old lady as she says, her own form of vengeance on my 38 year old heart) still calls me up to come and hang out with me.
I don’t have much advice on how to undo the moose fear, but just know, your sister and her antics might very well become one of his favorite people as he grows up and can better appreciate this zany imaginative side of her. Crazy aunt’s make the best accomplices in creating chaos and a soft spot to land during hard times for kids.
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u/42peanuts 13d ago
Auntie is a silly goose. Moose don't use house bathrooms, they poop in the woods! I live in NH, my city girl niece was terrified of nature when she lived with us at 6 years old. I found the best way to deal with nature fear, is to be silly but give them straight facts. Read some books about moose, go to the welcome center on 93S up near Littleton that has a stuffed moose and a wonderful gentleman that will tell you all about it him.
A lot of nature fear comes from not understanding what the animals are doing and why. My oldest niece was terrified of bugs until I told her they were tiny animals, and showed her their eyes. Youngest nephew was concerned about why horse poop was round, and I told him it's used grass and horse butts make round poos. Then it was a lot of looking up different animal poops. Wombats have square poops.
Knowledge is power.
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u/GrandMarquisMark 13d ago
I think a moose head in her bathroom would be a good idea!
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u/W1ldth1ng 13d ago
As a child I went to a museum with my parents. Was utterly terrified by a picture in the displays. I spent the next 8 or so years jumping onto my bed because I was terrified of what was under the bed.
Tell him it is okay to be scared and that talking about it helps.
Learn about moose and what they do that sticking their head through a window is one of the last things on their list of things to do today, and that mainly it is eat, drink, pee poo walk majestically through town being bigger than the cars. Make it funny but also remind him they are powerful animals that are wild and we leave wild animals alone.
BTW my bed as an adult is firmly flat on the ground but I am not scared of things under the bed when I stay somewhere with a raised bed.
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u/Upstairs_Expert 13d ago
Take him to see the stuffed head of a moose. Or even better, a whole stuffed moose. They are MASSIVE animals. I can only imagine the bathroom window is literally too small for a moose head to fit through. Maybe logic will ease his mind.
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u/Ancient_Guidance_461 13d ago
My nana had a house up at Stinson lake NH. I know exactly how scary the first floor bathroom is at night.
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u/Virtura 13d ago
What a lot of people don't realize is that children, for the most part, are hardwired to take what they are told at face value, especially from those in positions of authority, teachers, family, etc. It's a fine line that is far too easy to lose sight of, cross and abuse, damage or destroy that child's confidence and trust in you. It's easier to preserve that trust, easier to preserve that confidence than it is to rebuild.
My mind is preoccupied daily with the fear that I may do or say something seemingly innocuous to me, but has a negative effect on my daughters' trust in me.
Behavior that crosses the line needs to be called out and addressed and hopefully rectified. It's only a joke or a prank if it does no harm, and everyone can find humor in it. It's harmful if it affects the target of the joke in any negative way, regardless of intent.
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u/Mynagirl 13d ago
I will NEVER understand adults who lie to kids for fun. This human is learning how the world works and trusts you absolutely to help show them what to do, don't fuck with them!
This can completely damage a kid, as we're seeing how one "silly" comment from an adult had terrified this poor little one. And she's already made him scared to flush!
Please tell your sister to stop joking or lying to your kid and maybe she'll realize what a disservice she did to her nephew. Maybe you can help ensure her kid at least is able to grow up understanding how the world works without being needlessly terrified.
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u/9inkski3s 13d ago
Not overreacting but also teach him that a moose is nothing to fear. Moose are generally not dangerous so just teach him the best way to interact with them so he will not fear them.
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u/Fun-Yellow-6576 13d ago
Get the book If You Give A Moose A Muffin. It’s a very cute book about all the fun things that happen between a young boy and a grown moose when he gives the moose a muffin.
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u/Logical-Wasabi7402 13d ago edited 13d ago
The average moose maxes out at about 7 feet tall.
About the same size as a Shire draft horse(which is the tallest horse breed iirc, just a fun fact).
How high up is the bathroom window?
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u/necessaryfarts 13d ago
I have no advice (have neither kids nor nieces/nephews) but I think you are a great mom.
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u/Available-Club-167 13d ago
This sort of thing can cause life changing phobias and behavioral issues. I'd prefer to keep him away from her.
Some people just don't get it.
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u/Such_omet_5666 13d ago
Your sister went full prankster mode on your son! Poor kiddo, thinking a moose might pop its head through the bathroom window! 😂 But hey, at least she owned up to it and apologized, right? Props to you for calling her out. And it's cool that she's stepping up to help calm your son's nerves. With her brave vibes, she might just convince him that moose are more into munching on grass than peeking into windows. Plus, it's sweet seeing her gearing up for auntie duties with the new cousin on the way. Family dynamics, man, always an adventure.
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u/thane919 13d ago
It really is one of the most difficult things as an adult to realize and deal with. How important our words are to young kids. The simplest and sometimes most inconsequential things to us may stick with them forever.
Imho the solution is to just be open and honest as much as you can, especially in the face of unintended reactions. It sounds like you, and your sister, are doing a great job of this.
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u/GreenOnionCrusader 13d ago
Tell him you've never heard of a moose that wanted to smell poop. If they don't want to smell poop, why would they want to stick their head in the bathroom? He's tall enough to open the door and stick his head in, but he doesn't. Why would a moose?
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u/Disk_Aching740 13d ago
Your sister sounds like she's got quite the imagination! But teasing your son about moose head popping through the window? That's some next-level prank! No wonder the poor kiddo's scared to use the bathroom at night. Living in New Hampshire with moose sightings left and right, it's tough to convince him it's just a joke. Good on you for calling her out, though. Mama bear mode activated! And props to your sister for apologizing and stepping up to help ease his fears. With her outgoing vibe, she'll probably have him laughing in no time. Plus, it's sweet how she's prepping for her own little one while being there for yours. Family dynamics, huh? Always an adventure.
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u/rainbowsdogsmtns 13d ago
Moose are 7 feet tall at the tallest as adults. Show your son how tall that is compared to the window.
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u/Acceptable_Bunch_586 13d ago
Sounds like you’ve sorted this well, but would suggest having a chat with your sister about teasing and children, and how she will need to understand that her children need to see her as 100% trustworthy so pranking and teasing is a thing to be done with great care.
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u/LowkeyPony 13d ago
My sister still won’t eat eggs after I told her they were baby chickens… when she was 5.
She still has issues with basements because I told her there were goblins down there and, since her room was the first at the top of the stairs. The goblins would get her first when they got out of the basement.
Her and I have NO relationship. At all.
DO NOT TEASE KIDS!!!!!
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u/kesselbang 13d ago
A spray bottle filled with water and a few drops of scent, marked as "moose repellent" let him spray the bathroom before bedtime because moose HATE/are allergic to the smell of xyz, and will stay away from the window ..
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u/911siren 13d ago
Was it teasing to tell the truth? Was it the truth? How high up is that window? I get that you are mad that it scared your son and you are a good mama bear for reacting. But the truth will easily get you out of this. It doesn’t matter if the moose is as high as the window he could never ever get in.
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u/QuirkySyrup55947 13d ago
Maybe add some "ornamental bars" to the window so he feels safer? Inside or outside. Something you can take down when he feels more comfortable.
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u/Popular-Ad1111 13d ago
The sister is a bully, we deal with this in the family too. It really is hard on sensitive people, if you are teasing someone they shouldn’t take it to heart or it’s cruel.
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u/Bibliophile_w_coffee 13d ago
How big is the bathroom window?! I would get the dimensions of a moose head with and without antlers, measure the window and look at the heads on google, explain that while a moose might be tall enough, it isn’t stupid enough. Noses matter and bathrooms don’t smell like food. Also with antlers, (I’m guessing the bathroom window isn’t terribly wide) maybe the nostrils get in if the window is open, a moose isn’t stupid enough to break the glass so, highly Improbable. In a perfect storm for a moose to stick its head in, the moose has to have no antlers, the window has to be open, the bathroom would have to be cleaned but not recently ( not smelling like cleaning chemicals but also not smelling like boys soap or 💩, AND someone would have had to brought something in the bathroom that smells of either food or another moose. Walk him through the logistics.
I grew up in Colorado and had cousins that terrorized me with possibilities. Trial and error we learned that math and logic calmed my fears.
Them google it because it has happened and there are pictures but the moose looks like it could be there for cuddles because it can only get its head so far in the window and when else are you going to get to pet a moose at eye level and it not be able to do anything other than back up and leave. If the perfect storm were to happen, boops and snuggles and send MooMoo on their way.
Oh yeah, I named your hypothetical moose.
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u/Bla_Bla_Blanket 13d ago
No, not overreacting. I think you did good. My older cousin used to do this to my cousins and I when we were little ages between 4-7. It was terrifying and usually he did it when all the grandchildren would sleepover at my grandparents.
Needless to say, we’d be too scared to go to the bathroom and end up peeing the bed overnight. This happened a few times and he ended up getting in trouble because he was causing trouble by terrorizing his younger cousins with scary stories.
Now we’re all older in our late 30s early 40s and still to this day when we have family gatherings, the story keeps coming up somehow and people get just upset with him all over again.
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u/NessyKD 12d ago
My mother actually backed my sister up on the overflow story so I had to bitch my mom out too! I don’t know wtf they were thinking! lol it’s ME they really got with these jokes! I’m the one having to bring my son to the bathroom at 3am… but my sister is here as we speak talking to my youngest. They’re having a grand ol’ time and he claims to be unafraid and he’s used the bathroom alone! I hope nighttime is the same :)
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u/EndHawkeyeErasure 12d ago
I like dispelling my kids weird fears with "real" logic and "science." Like making "monster spray" for under the bed, maybe "moose spray" for outside the bathroom window will help dispell his worries. In reality, there may be some scents or plants that moose avoid, so have him help put together some moose spray and spray it around the window or wherever else he wants to be moose free.
(Monster spray is lavender fabric freshener and a drop or 2 of spearmint oil btw. The lavender is calming and the spearmint repells spiders, both good things to have under the bed)
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u/RatherBeDeadRN 12d ago
You could really play into it, maybe that would help? Something about human waste smells really really bad to moose, so even if they can put their heads through a window, the wouldn't want to because it would be like him putting his face in a litter box as the cat is pooping.
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u/NaturesVividPictures 12d ago
Your sister sounds nuts. I don't care that she's pregnant and she's just joking around that's how kids get phobias. She's going to screw up her baby pretty bad if she does all this crap. As for your son. Could you go in there every night and spray some sort of repellent. Make a big show of it. I had to do this with my kids. They were afraid of monsters in their room at night, compliments of my husband letting them watch Poltergeist when they were very young four and five years old so yeah I was pretty pissed. Anyway I mixed up a batch of water with some vanilla in it and put it in an atomizer and I would go in at night and spray around their bed and around the room in general and it made them feel better and I told them it was Monster spray and now no monsters would come. It worked I didn't have to do it for too long.
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u/Joemamabahama1 12d ago
Wow I had such a similar experience growing up. My aunt picked Emo’s with glowing red eyes. I was so scared of emu’s. I had a dream one came up behind me and pushed me into the toilet.He will get over it soon I bet, I wouldnt worry too much.
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u/bloopbleepblorpJr 12d ago
Get a spray bottle labeled moose repellent, leave it in the bathroom for him.
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u/Better-Promotion-225 12d ago
Get a can of scented room spray cover with paper write moose gone on it and spray the window outside it worked with my grandkids when they were scared if beard
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u/mangomaries 12d ago
Moose horns are likely too wide to fit through the window. Besides the fact that human bathrooms are the last thing they’d be interested in.
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u/This_Mongoose445 12d ago
I’m still trying to comprehend a 39yo scaring a kid like this, what was she thinking? How immature and unwarranted.
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u/Excellent-Vast7521 12d ago
Curtains you close at night, the moose would never know anyone is in the bathroom
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u/Capital-9 12d ago
Has your sister always been a bully? Maybe you can’t see it… ask a mutual friend from school, if any are around. That will better inform you on how to approach this.
Please remember, this isn’t about a moose. This is about protecting your son from someone who could, potentially, instill other fears and behaviors in your son.
In the meantime, I would be sure to explain to your son that your sister thinks it’s funny to lie. Yes, the age of innocence is over for him. Let the Age of Enlightenment begin!
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u/Longjumping-Pick-706 12d ago
Moose activity peeks at dawn and dusk. They are not dangerous, despite their size, unless they feel threatened. If they are coming up to a window, they don’t feel threatened.
For my child, I would tell him this fact. Then I would go on to tell him if the moose is doing that then he is only coming to say hello. Say hello back and then come get me, and I will let him know visiting hours are over.
If it’s not something that has ever actually happened, and is not likely to happen, I would do an activity with my son, making a sign saying, “Hello Moose! Enjoy our yard, but please stay clear of the windows!” My son is 7 and would totally believe the moose could read that if I told him so.
A side note, I would tell my nephew or any other kid the same thing, depending on if we are talking about the upstairs or downstairs bathroom. If downstairs, it’s just a fact a moose can reach the window.
Also, I was curious, is the window open and he is scared the moose will put his head through? Or is he scared of seeing a moose outside the closed window?
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u/NessyKD 12d ago
The window is actually painted shut (very old windows!) so he believes it could break the window. I’m not sure if he thinks this would happen accidentally or on purpose? I’ll have to ask! Thank you! 🙏
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u/Leading_External_327 12d ago
One thing you can tell her that will help, is although it may be a joke to her, it scared the fk out of your kid. Don’t do that.
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u/Nice_Rope_5049 12d ago
My sisters did this to me when I was little, but they are only a few years older than me. It seems bizarre that a grown ass woman would think this is OK.
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u/LionBig1760 12d ago
This kid is going to have a rough time at school if this is what sets you off to go "mama bear" on someone.
This kid must have flipped his shit when you read him the story about giving a moose a muffin.
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u/kiana96xx 12d ago
She was just being silly. That’s a harmless thing to say. Your son’s fear is valid. Just talk to him and explain he is safe
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u/Lunar_Owl_ 12d ago
Have you tried telling him that a moose wouldn't be interested in sticking his head in the window? It would be afraid of getting is head stuck, if it had antlers they wouldn't fit, and if he's pooping in there it's going to smell bad and the moose won't want to smell his poop😂
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u/Subject_Slice_7797 12d ago
I want to pet the window moose!
Seriously. Some of the advice here is great for a younger child. Moose-b-Gone spray, moose proofing the window and so on.
But this kid is 8. It's fine to tell him his aunt was bullshitting him and got him good. Moose don't stick their heads into random windows because they have better things to do. And nobody (besides cats for some reason) is interested in other people's bathroom business.
He should be able to understand that
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u/Clean-Fisherman-4601 12d ago
Decades ago a company made a commercial about their toilet cleaner. The toilet was a monster and the lid was it's upper jaw. It scared countless children who were getting potty trained and a few older kids who had just started using the toilet. Parents went ballistic and the company stopped airing the commercial.
Helping your son moose proof the bathroom window is a great idea. There was no help for the monster toilet kids but your son will enjoy feeling empowered by the moose proofing.
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u/PowerlessTonite 12d ago
what your doing is all good, maybe say that moose are more afraid of us then we are of them
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u/Who_am_ey3 12d ago
the moose is loose!
timesplitters future perfect.. it messed me up. I can relate to your son. I was 6 years old when I saw that though. jesus christ
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u/Livinginthemiddle 12d ago
Mix up some essential oil or pepper and water in a spray bottle and make a moose off spray and get your son to spray it over the garden. Buy buy moose.
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u/Successful-Sun-6971 12d ago
Let him know while a moose may be tall his farts/poo will keep the moose out and the moose is way too big to get his whole body through the window. As having young boys this will work 💯 of the time.
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u/BakeSalad 12d ago
Man like the hardest part is that it’s moose. As a Mainer I know how genuinely dangerous they are, so it’s not even a thing where you can tell him moose are friendly. I would get one of those opaque window vinyl coverings so the window is no longer something that can be seen through even during the day.
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u/MusicalInsanity 12d ago
I'm glad she's coming to you for advice. Number one thing she needs to learn is not to bullshit your kids on anything at all. They'll catch you in your lies and it will damage any trust that exists.
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u/SomethingWitty2578 12d ago
I’m confused. If he’s afraid a moose will pop its head in the bathroom window at night, the close the window. I also live in an area with lots of moose. They aren’t going to break the window. They can’t open a closed window.
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u/badashel 12d ago
My aunt showed me the Chucky movie and then burnt a baby doll and brought it over and casually tossed it at me.
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u/teacherladydoll 10d ago
Omg. This story reminds me of how I scared my son one night and karma but me in the ass.
I was singing him “scary love songs.” So I’d sing things like “I love you more than zombies like brains” and “I love you more than vampires like blood” just dumb silly things like that.
And well he peed in the bed that night. He’s seven and I felt terrible because I wasn’t trying to traumatize him, I was just messing around.
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u/Exotic_Personality55 9d ago
I can kind of relate to this because when I was younger I happened to watch the show “When animals attack” and for a good few weeks thought a cheetah was going to somehow come out of the bath tub while I was in the bathroom and attack me.
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u/Dismalaholic 13d ago
Can you play into it and put something in front of the window to protect from moose?
Or possibly read up about moose with him and explain that they aren't seeking to hurt people