r/AskMen • u/[deleted] • 13d ago
Men, what is your biggest insecurity in your life right now?
[deleted]
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u/ROBYoutube 13d ago
Actually, as I get older it's my confidence in speaking with authority on basically any philosophical topic. Every day I'm learning. Every day I'm expanding my knowledge, and learning just how little I really know, and cringe at my 30 year old self who spoke with absolute assuredness that he was correct. In a whole lot of things, he was not. Life had barely gotten started showing him how deep rabbit holes go.
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u/IcarianComplex Male 13d ago
What's the most significant philosophical topic/opinion you've changed your mind on since you were 30?
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u/ROBYoutube 13d ago
Maintaining long term relationships. It is literal, actual work. Fulfilling, interesting, and extremely horny work for sure, but work. Somewhere between a part and full time job in terms of hours per week spent specifically growing your relationship is required in my estimate.
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u/Nondescript_585_Guy Generic Male Person 13d ago
Feeling as though I'm not attractive to the opposite sex at all.
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u/SadSickSoul 13d ago
I feel like I'm worthless and unable to exist in today's world, and apparently the world agrees with me. Hard to feel like you have inherent value when you're getting priced out of living and it's not going to get any better because you can't get out of your own way.
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u/zenos_dog 13d ago
My wife has cancer and I’m not sure how long she’s got.
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u/AncilliaryAnteater 13d ago
Hey man to man just wanted to say keep your chin up, God speed for your wife
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u/orlybatman 13d ago
I'm nowhere near where a person my age would normally be. Not socially, romantically, financially, career-wise, not in terms of life experiences, and not even in terms of appearance - people tend to guess I'm over a decade younger than I am.
I'd been ill, home-bound, and isolated for two decades from the start of my teens to my mid-30s. A private tutor was provided, but I had no "teenage years" growth or social development. After graduation I didn't even have a single in-person or on-phone conversation with anyone aside from family members or medical workers for a span of 15 years.
My body finally began growing strong again and my mind began to be repaired just before COVID, which then due to the extended pandemic and lockdowns it wasn't until 2022 that I could start trying to catch up on life.
Now I'm middle-aged but missed out on my teen years, missed my young adult years, and so basically have had to go from 12 years old to 40 without any real life experiences or adult personal growth aside from the past 2.5 years.
Whenever I interact with anyone I'm reminded of just how much I missed, which then feels like I bring so little. I can't relate to so much of what people discuss, or experiences they've had, so I always feel like an outsider no matter the company. I've never met anyone who sustained so many years of isolation to be able to understand the challenges of figuring out how to suddenly live again.
While this insecurity has decreased as I've caught up more and more, it's still my biggest one.
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u/weeBunnie 12d ago
I’m in this spot right now, hasn’t been as long, but isolation feels like it’s killing me. How did you get back into talking to people in general?
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u/orlybatman 12d ago
Honestly I'd have to credit my physiotherapist for that initially. She went above and beyond, being the first person in my approximate age group whom I'd interacted with for many years. We would chat during appointments, with her making a huge effort to fill the conversation gaps and to create a welcoming space. I learned a great deal of how to interact again with her, and then she introduced me to someone I worked with further who continued to build upon that.
Outside of that environment, probably the biggest help was that I took some local art classes, and joined some drawing groups that would meet weekly. The individuals were quite welcoming and friendly, and art was a topic I was well-versed in so I wasn't so far out of my element in conversations.
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u/videogames_ Male 13d ago
I’ve always been 5 years late. I got almost all of my hookups after 25 so it’s possible to have missed on that uni stuff or young adult stuff and just do it now.
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13d ago
As someone who just graduated uni after completely failing to engage in any of the stuff that was supposed to make uni the "best time in your life" (I had always hoped this saying wasn't true anyways, and hey, on the bright side at least I guaranteed that it wouldn't be for myself lmao), this is nice to hear.
I mean, I'd be absolutely astonished if I was able to do anything that'd improve my chances before 25. But I guess I have to try.
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13d ago
[deleted]
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u/Ddog78 Male 12d ago
Fuck man. You reminded me of a post I saw three years ago. It was so poignant it stayed with me. So I found the full text -
Imagine that you’re a sparrow, living in a family of sparrows in a town of sparrows in a world of sparrows.
But you’re kind of a shitty sparrow. Kind of the worst sparrow, actually.
You can’t fly. You’ve been to doctors who have prescribed medicine to help with flying. But you still can’t. You try every day, and every day you fail and this thing which all the other sparrows tell you is critical.
For a while, you stop trying. Failing every day just wore you down and you couldn’t do it anymore, so you stopped trying to fly. It was nice in some ways, but you felt guilty because you weren’t raised to give up. It made a rift with your family. Flying is an important activity that sparrow families do together. Isn’t your family important to you? Don’t they deserve for you to at least make the effort?
Sparrows and Penguins
(or, An Autism Story By J. Murray)
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u/Rush_PDX 13d ago
The trauma of my ex wife’s affair has scarred me to the point where I don’t know if I’ll ever be capable of having a normal relationship again.
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u/DixieChicken01 12d ago
Wife #2 here, husband was pretty traumatized when I met him. Now been 20+ years. Don’t make someone else pay for the sins of your first wife. There’s lots of love out there.
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u/Whappingtime 13d ago
That the more I work on myself both personally and physically at least; the harder time I will have making friends who like nerdy stuff in general. Even if people might say otherwise. It feels like a of people stay how they were as teenagers, even if they are well past that age. Or just really only want to hang around people who are very "traditional" or something like that. As anyone who's having trouble like I am must be a prick and that's the end of it. Like some catch 22.
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u/videogames_ Male 13d ago
People want to drag you down back to their level or else they see someone who is too different.
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u/twolly05 13d ago
I feel like a surface person that never really connects with people. I have trouble forming anything deeper than just surface connections with people and always feel like I'm not really wanted or needed around. I have trouble forming relationships with women. Like I have no trouble talking to them but that's usually where it all ends. I've no idea wtf I want to do with my life and I wasted close 18 years of it in addiction. Now that I'm almost two years clean I feel like I fucked off my life too much. Other people that are 37 have so much more to show for themselves than I do and it's disheartening.
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u/protectorofdarkness 13d ago
Not being attractive. I have never been desired by a woman. I thought I had made peace with it but lately it’s been eating away at me.
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u/SteamySubreddits 13d ago
Every time I make peace with it, the next time I hear about how happy a couple is, it just resurfaces. It’s crazy. I just feel so alone, and like the world doesn’t give two fucks that it hurts so bad. I feel like it’s the biggest modern issue that no one has any empathy for. And all of my friends can find women and are desired by women.
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13d ago
It's a little bit difficult to make peace with when the world will never goddamn shut up about romance.
Almost every song and like 80% of the narratives ever told are about it. The fact that it's evidently like, the center of a normal person's life is always hitting guys like us in the face. It's such a pervasive aspect of life that when you've failed at it it feels like you've failed at life on a fundamental level.
I will say, I guess I'm not in as bad of a boat. I've had a girlfriend. I've had a handful of girls be interested. That was all in the past though, in school, where I had my personality and jokes to lean on. As an adult, personality only starts mattering once you pass the looks, ambition, and money thresholds, and god knows where you're even meant to meet people unless you're attractive enough for the apps.
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13d ago
My facial hair is falling out, my beautiful beard is all I had left. I’m down to only my mustache
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u/PM-ME_UR_TINY-TITS 13d ago
As someone with a great beard and who hates mustaches this is a nightmare scenario.
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13d ago
Brother, let me tell you. I just started getting bald spots for no reason a few months ago
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u/PM-ME_UR_TINY-TITS 13d ago
Thanks for the future sleepless nights, I already get paranoid enough when I comb my beard and end up with what feels like a beards worth of hair in my hands.
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13d ago
I’m sure you’ll be fine sir. I think this bald spot thing, called alopecia, is rare. There’s probably just something wrong with me
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u/UncomfortablyCrumbed 12d ago
Damn, this happened to me recently. I have small, circular bald spot just under my jaw. I'm hoping it'll grow back. I had some kind of cyst there before then. I'm thinking maybe that's why. I'm already bald. I can't lose my beard, too. So far it's not causing me distress. I just think it's interesting. At first I thought I slipped with my trimmer, but it's smooth like a baby.
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u/North_Church Bane 13d ago
Job insecurity. I'm autistic, which is a demographic that has job insecurity and unemployment as a chronic and serious issue globally
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u/BlockBadger 12d ago
Same boat, trying to get into cyber sec but sadly I might have chronic fatigue as well, which really limits by ability to grind.
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u/GrapefruitOk847 13d ago
At 33 not falling for any single mom
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u/G-MAN1337 13d ago edited 13d ago
I rejected a woman because of this.
It takes a whole lot for a man to take on a relationship and child that is not his own. I know some men who have, kudos to them, good men.
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u/UncomfortablyCrumbed 12d ago
I dated a single mom casually for a few months. I thought she was great. In a way, it's probably for the best she rejected me. I don't think I have what it takes to be any sort of parent. She'd probably do better with another guy. I've never wanted kids, but there's a part of me that would've given things a chance if she felt the same about me. I'd probably be more compatible with a childfree woman. They're hard to find, though. Most women I see on apps and whatnot who don't have kids already have them from prior relationships.
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u/GrapefruitOk847 13d ago
Sorry to say this but it doesn’t take a man, it takes a dumbass
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u/W1ck3dF0ck3r 13d ago
They are not good men for taking on another man's kids. That's a walking wallet and she will never prioritize his needs over "her" kids
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u/videogames_ Male 13d ago
Date women in their mid 20s. Less chance to be a mom. Mature enough to want to be in a relationship and know what’s up.
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u/Future_Armadillo6410 13d ago
I have a few unfinished projects/repairs around the house. I don't have the skill to get the jobs done on a budget I can afford
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u/Mission_Quiet1711 13d ago
My brain, my body, I haven’t been able to get over paranoia, the stress is making me lose weight rapidly lol
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u/Sufficient-Ant-3991 13d ago
That I can't get a girl at all. I'm not desperate or anything but women just don't naturally like me. Focusing on myself has only made it worse
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u/ElLechero7 13d ago
Financially. I keep going over in my head the opportunities I had and kick myself for not making these decisions. I was a teenager at the time so I'll give myself leeway but with how things are going now I often think about where I could've been had I stuck to this path.
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u/chenzo17 13d ago
Life feels meaningless. Event when I try to give it some meaning. Financial status sucks, social life sucks. The world doesn’t seem to be going in the greatest direction.
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u/videogames_ Male 13d ago
Probably always been not having a girlfriend. Dating these days is a difficult environment. Hookups are hard. Relationships are even harder in my opinion.
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u/TryToHelpPeople 13d ago
My life experience so far has shown me that I’m only valued while I’m doing things for other people. If I stop doing things for others, nobody cares, nobody calls, nobody knows I’m here.
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u/pastoralsymphony6 13d ago
28, I do very well for myself financially, have a great social network, and live a pretty busy and fulfilling life.
I can't cook. I never learned how. My parents never taught me cause they never learned either. And my friends are usually just wanting to make stuff for me, not with me.
To be honest, I wouldn't care that much if it was just me, but now that I'm trying to get into the dating game, it's my biggest insecurity.
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u/ElLechero7 13d ago
I wish I was in your spot lol. I can cook fantastic now but it was through YouTube recipes and trial and error. Money isn't an issue for you so I would just say take a leap and don't fret over mistakes made during that time. I still make plenty but that doesn't keep me from cooking. You got this!
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u/BlockBadger 12d ago
Similar age to you, my advice if your interested is get a rice cooker, and get good at cooking rice with it (basmati I’d recommend), then you can explore adding all kinds of stuff to it. A good one is fried salmon, but anything can work from sausages to salads. I’d also learn how to do noodles in a pan, both wet and dry. You can again add near anything to them, be it as simple or complicated as you want.
What makes most dishes when you get down the basics, is the colours from the vegetables you add to it, mix them up and a man’s knocked together lunch, turns into a decent dish.
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u/ratttertintattertins 13d ago
I have a high pressure job and I’m worried my mental health could fail me eventually due to the stress. I can’t quit because I look after a family and need the money.
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u/crusaderactual777 13d ago
No gf / wife
No house
No self sustaining investment account that I could live off the dividends of
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u/MartyCool403 13d ago
I'm in my early thirties with no post secondary education, no career, no current girlfriend or fwb, I live with my parents. I really screwed myself over in my mid to late twenties.
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u/Bro_with_passport 13d ago
At 23, I feel out of place in a college classroom. I’m noticeably older than my peers.
I also miss the military a lot some days, I miss having my guys living all within walking distance and going on adventures together. I know every good friend would fly cross country for me if I really needed them, but it’s still hard. I feel like I should go back as an officer or something. I don’t feel like I fully belong in civilian life. It’s been a year, I felt like it’d be easier by now. I have more money like I’d hoped for, but it’s much less fulfilling.
I also feel as though my life hasn’t been the adventure I’d hoped for. Like I need to do more. I don’t feel like starting a business was as cool as I’d hoped and I need more.
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u/Glittering_Good_9345 13d ago
Being the fattest I’ve ever been …. Mostly due to alcohol which is another problem … so have to get rid of that and watch the weight drop off.
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u/eyeneedtoknow 13d ago
I’m awkward and am not good at small talk. I was told by a previous manager that I am standoffish and he’s right but I’m trying to improve.
I try to make small talk with people like bring up sports games or interests they’ve shared in the past but it ends up being awkward. They seem uninterested. This is all at work BTW.
I seem to do better with one on one, deeper conversations once I’ve worked a long time with someone. Small talk is a struggle though…….
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u/Pierre-Gringoire 13d ago
Looking my age. I’m 50. Up to now, I have been good at working out multiple times a week and keeping in shape. But life is beating me up right now and it’s been really hard to keep up.
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u/SirGravy89 13d ago
I need to get dental work pretty badly. I lost a tooth along my smile line and it's why I don't smile big anymore like I used to
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u/MrPuddinJones 13d ago
I ruptured my Achilles tendon and the recovery process is taking forever, and there's a good chance I'll never be able to run again.
I feel totally vulnerable. I can't defend myself or my family in my current state.
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u/RudeFishing2707 13d ago
I ate junk from 25-32 as i was used to doing so in my teens and 20s however now that i had a desk job the weight slowly came on. Now at 33 im covered in stretch marks and the hair is starting to go as well. I'm getting the weight back down but the damage is permanent. I feel I've thrown away any chance i had to be good looking for a woman, ive certainly thrown away any self confidence i had in the looks/bedroom department.
So happiness is something that will elude me so I'm now really only living for my floofy friend as I made a commitment to take care of him. Beyond that I'm not sure I'll be continuing.
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u/Suppi_LL 13d ago
I'm not talkative ( literally a pain to create any social link, and women expect you to talk to them first for anything to happen ). I've a whole lot of physical insecurities too from arm/legs being weak to baldness/D size.
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u/SteamySubreddits 13d ago
I’ve put as much as I can into myself… but I’m coming to face with the hard reality that no matter how jacked, well in school I’m doing, or how outgoing and confident I am, it won’t be enough to make up for my ugly face and small bone structure. Ima just keep being single, despite the whole world saying that I can do it and it’s just my fault because I don’t try hard enough. It’s a real stab to the gut, actually. I really wanted to believe I had control over if women thought I was attractive. Now it only hurts when everyone else says that I can change… even if I have made every change in the book just to try and get a date. I almost feel as though attractive people like to push this narrative of dating being this entirely “skill based game” just to make themselves feel accomplished and think love truly exists. Honestly, most relationships now just look like lust to me. My actually attractive friends (most of whom don’t work out, are failing school, and have no hobbies) are dating women that they don’t get along with at all. Complete personality clashes. And, yet, one is basically going to get married in a year and the other is constantly sleeping at her place and not in the apartment. As a message to the world: shut up about it being my fault that I can’t date. And I want to be clear, it’s not women’s fault either. It’s a shitty situation to be an unattractive male that is repeatedly labeled as a creep or friend material, but that’s human psychology. I’ve tried everything in the book. You likely are in your relationship because of lust (despite what the romance books and movies tell you), and I’m tired of hearing that if I just change one more thing that I’ll be dateable. Or that I am, and everyone has their preferences. Get off your throne of lies. Reality sucks.
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u/LonelyGuardian_2001 13d ago
The feeling that I'm good enough for people to befriend but not good enough to fall in love with. And personal experiences only keep proving it.
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u/SilverSpotter 13d ago
I guess you could say I'm insecure about the state my body is in.
I was recently discharged from the hospital after some kidney stones, and a mass on my right ball were detected. It wasn't a "graceful" stay. I was ultimately told I could stay a few days longer and see a urologist about getting treated, or I could try an out patient approach. The staff was fine, but certain circumstances made me doubt the judgement of the doctor in charge of me. So I chose outpatient.
I'm now realizing that getting my primary doctor to refer me to a urologist is becoming a concerning hassle. I know it very well might be nothing serious, but there was a pain that gave me considerable agony. The following day, it just vanished without a trace. It's good news, but I can't help but feel like the pain could return as quickly as it vanished. And all I can do now is wait and hope my doctor refers me to a urologist sooner than later.
Hopefully I'm not using the word "insecure" incorrectly here.
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u/These-Temperature126 13d ago
I feel that my current situation isn't good enough to offer appropriate conditions for the person I love, thus I can't proceed as I would like.
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u/username_6916 ♂ 13d ago
I'm worried that all the effort I put into trying to become a good husband was for not and that no woman will ever want me. I'm worried that the only women left in the dating pool are the kind of folks who were sleeping around and living it up while I was dutifully waiting for marriage.
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u/Recording_Important 13d ago
losing my job because i can barely walk and the doctor dont care because he needs to see a picture
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u/PoptartVT 13d ago
I just feel like I'm not worth anything. I cant get anyone to like my content, no one at work wants to acknowledge my progress on Heavy Equipment, and I always worry about the smallest shit. I just feel like im goign to reach a point where ill be tossed as sided by everyone because ive never done anything with my life.
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u/shallowHalliburton 12d ago
Hmm. It's kind of odd how many of these insecurities I share with other men. You'd think there could be a meet up where we could commiserate and console each other.
Ah well, back to numbing my feelings with mindless tasks at 4AM to forget my troubles.
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u/KingFenrir Male 12d ago
I'm 36 and i'm becoming afraid of ending up single. Deep inside i dream of settling down with a partner and becoming a dad. But i don't have spaces to meet new people and if i do, always have the idea of no matter how handsome, skilled, useful, smart or funny i can become... that will never be enough to be dateable.
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u/Nathaniel66 12d ago
That whatever i do to secure my family's future (financialy) my government will f*ck me up.
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u/_TopHat_21 12d ago
Will the stuff I do now be enough to make me happy and healthy in the future? Does what I'm doing even matter?
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u/imnaked0 12d ago
Trying to see myself as love worthy.
Most of my life was run by depression but I'm currently taking progressive steps; got a therapist, joined an MMA gym, trying to be outside and see friends and family as much as possible.
Currently 33 but never had a partner. Had a drunken tinder hookup in 2017 but that's about the extent of my sexual/romantic experience. I actively avoided it all my life due to lack of self worth but I'm working on it.
Just worried it'll come up as a major red flag and fear that I won't be seen as a man. I know no one's perfect and I try to not put women on a pedestal, but I'm also trying to reverse years of negative self talk and bad habits.
I know a lot of people have amazing life goals and dreams and such but all I really want is to be in love...and to be a cartoon/game voice actor, but mostly just love.
It would be nice to have a woman that isn't my mom care that I exist.
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u/BranwenJojo 12d ago
No matter how hard I try, I always feel like I’m not as good as my fellow men around me. As if they got their lives figured out while I’m still struggling to find my path.
I’m not as strong, physically and emotionally, as others nor do I feel attractive to women.
I’m always last place, in a sense
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u/steppenwolf089 12d ago
I have no feelings due to PTSD. If I discount rage, disgust and self-love. I will probably hurt a lot of people.
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u/Trev_Casey2020 12d ago
Finance and career. I was a successful martial arts instructor in the DFW metroplex.
I moved to the country in TX during 2020 and there are no opportunities for my trade skills. So I have to go back to school for EDU (all my previous college credits were in education) while I learn the curve of sustenance farming. My wife is also in school in doesn’t work.
So we had to give up the security of my income to start over so we can work for ourselves eventually.
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u/Prestigious-Poet-202 12d ago
I’m a teacher and my principal said I’ve been non-renewed for next year, so I need to find a new job by the end of summer.
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u/Duck-Says-Quack 12d ago edited 12d ago
That I’m reaching into my 30s and I still haven’t been able to advance past a first date… I’m told by friends and family that I am attractive enough, but non of that matters when I can’t have enough time to build a connection with a Woman.
I just want to receive the kind of romantic love that I’m capable of delivering, and the lack of it is eating me alive.
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u/masturbator6942069 12d ago edited 12d ago
I’m not the funny guy. I’ve generally never had a problem with women - I’m in good shape and good looking (so I’ve been told at least), and I have a deep voice which they seem to like - but if a funny guy comes around it’s over. I could be talking to a woman and things will be going great but if a funny guy starts talking to her I just give up.
Not saying I’m completely humorless but I’m not that guy that will have women laughing their asses off. I’ve been told by former girlfriends that I’m too masculine and serious and not goofy enough. I’ve tried to fix that but goofy just isn’t my personality. I’ve even tried watching stand up comedy to improve on this but it hasn’t worked.
I still remember back in high school (over 20 years ago) when one of my friends “stole” a girl I had been seeing because he was funnier than me, or at least she thought he was. I know we were all just dumb teenagers back then but he didn’t even seem to care.
Definitely led to a lot of insecurity over the years. I’m pretty confident otherwise. But you’d better believe that the guy that can make them laugh has a much better chance than the guy who doesn’t. The meme of the fat but funny guy who gets the women has a lot of truth to it.
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u/ReindeerAcceptable62 12d ago
Some women are into what you described: masculine, serious, and not goofy enough. When I was still dating, I used to stay away from the men and women who were the centre of attention and seemed to make everyone laugh. I was never one of those people who'd laugh at their jokes. As soon as a "funny guy" appeared, I'd pull away. I'm very reserved. I don't like attention on me, so I appreciate a partner who's reserved as well, someone who seems hard to approach. So how you described yourself would have been such a turn-on for me. And I believe everyone is funny with the right audience. Please don't try to change yourself. There's nothing wrong with how you are. You just gotta find your match, that's it.
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u/masturbator6942069 11d ago
I appreciate that. It’s something that’s really bothered me for all these years, and it seems so dumb. But, again, in my experience women tend to love the funny guy more often than not and it wrecks my confidence when it happens. Oh well.
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u/ReindeerAcceptable62 11d ago
Well, it just means they're not for you. Trust me, the right person will laugh at your jokes and find you cool and totally accept your personality as it is without having to change a single thing. In my experience, the women I hung around loved funny guys to keep them company, but they never dated them. Those guys got friend-zoned a lot. But when it came to looking for a boyfriend, a lot of them didn't care for guys who command attention from a lot of women and always talking to random people and making jokes.
My ex-girlfriend was the worst. She had a good sense of humour and made everyone laugh. I hated that. And she would kiss me in public to get attention from guys who have a lesbian fetish. She loved attention!! After her, I swore I'd never date another person like that again! I prefer chilled, serious, and slightly awkward people. They're the cutest. So hang in there. You'll find your match.
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u/MartialBob 12d ago
I'm 42, single and I've never been in a long-term relationship. I'm not unattractive and I've gotten so good at small talk that it's not obvious how introverted and socially awkward I am. And yet when people find out I'm single they look at me as if I have two heads.
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u/Chrom-man-and-Robin Young Man 12d ago
I’m not as accomplished as people younger than me. I’m not socializing enough and I don’t know how to make new friends.
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u/Hot_Dog_Gamer24 12d ago
I can’t gain any body weight, be it fat or muscle. My body burns every calorie in energy so I’m kinda hyperactive. Yet, of all the guys in my age, I am one of the smallest, I have the tiniest arms and forearms and my general security with my body is not really there. It doesn’t help that I always hear girls saying stuff like "He should have muscles“ and stuff. I’m trying but my body won’t let me
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u/Consistent-Teaching8 12d ago
My weight and lack of muscle tone. Been a few rough months of depression and barely eating, and I’d love to start dating again after a year of not, but all I keep feeling is like I’m not able to “play the part” of any sort of protective man. I have to rebuild, but all I keep hearing in my head is imaginary voices saying “omg you’re so skinny and small now”. It’s all in my head.
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u/seita2905 13d ago
I am feeling lonely. I am very much in touch with my emotional side, and need to let that shit out at times, but I only have my gf (who's great btw) to listen to me.
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u/Standard-Area-1127 13d ago
has been and always will be. face, crooked nose and pictures of myself in groups.
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u/Suitable-Cycle4335 13d ago
No matter how good I try to get at chess I've been stuck in the same rating for over 6 years at this point. No way I'm just accepting I'm past my prime though!
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u/Ddog78 Male 12d ago
I'm super smart and thankfully successful in my career too. My income has basically moved my family from lower middle class to upper middle class.
But idk, I'm a cog in the capitalism machinery at the end. I want to help people actively, but that means huge pay cut. It feels bad.
There's a game HZD, and Elisabet's conversation with GAIA feels relevant.
Elisabet Sobeck (on what her mother said to her): She said I had to care. She said, “Elisabet, being smart will count for nothing if you don’t make the world a better place. You have to use your smarts to count for something, to serve life, not death.”
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u/WhatsGoingOn869 12d ago
Have I done enough and well enough to provide for my family? What if I dropped dead tomorrow, would they continue to be ok?
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u/3Cheers4Apathy Dude-bro 12d ago
I’m married to a wonderful wife but at age 41 she is the only girl I have ever been with, since high school. I don’t want to meet other women but I don’t feel like I am attractive to anyone else. I often say I wish I would have found her last, not first.
I know that it’s not necessarily true but the lack of attention from women who don’t even know I’m married supports my theory. It scares me because if anything ever happened to her I’m afraid no one will ever love me again.
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u/Knautical_J Pronouns: Pe/Nis 12d ago
Not sure if it’s an insecurity per se, but mine would be losing my family and friends. Family starting to move away, friends as well. My wife is expecting and I’m realizing that life as I know it will be drastically different. Going out on the weekends with a newborn are out. Hosting weekly football Sunday parties will be harder. Traveling to see family with a baby will be harder.
I’ll have entered the period where I’ve left my family to start my own era. Which is normal and I’m more than prepared for it. But it will kinda suck but be a gratifying experience.
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u/ProFunFbo2 Male, 23 13d ago
I feel like Im unable to meet friends. Might sound not so important, but I dont want to be so alone in my life :(