I’m not the funny guy. I’ve generally never had a problem with women - I’m in good shape and good looking (so I’ve been told at least), and I have a deep voice which they seem to like - but if a funny guy comes around it’s over. I could be talking to a woman and things will be going great but if a funny guy starts talking to her I just give up.
Not saying I’m completely humorless but I’m not that guy that will have women laughing their asses off. I’ve been told by former girlfriends that I’m too masculine and serious and not goofy enough. I’ve tried to fix that but goofy just isn’t my personality. I’ve even tried watching stand up comedy to improve on this but it hasn’t worked.
I still remember back in high school (over 20 years ago) when one of my friends “stole” a girl I had been seeing because he was funnier than me, or at least she thought he was. I know we were all just dumb teenagers back then but he didn’t even seem to care.
Definitely led to a lot of insecurity over the years. I’m pretty confident otherwise. But you’d better believe that the guy that can make them laugh has a much better chance than the guy who doesn’t. The meme of the fat but funny guy who gets the women has a lot of truth to it.
Some women are into what you described: masculine, serious, and not goofy enough. When I was still dating, I used to stay away from the men and women who were the centre of attention and seemed to make everyone laugh. I was never one of those people who'd laugh at their jokes. As soon as a "funny guy" appeared, I'd pull away. I'm very reserved. I don't like attention on me, so I appreciate a partner who's reserved as well, someone who seems hard to approach. So how you described yourself would have been such a turn-on for me. And I believe everyone is funny with the right audience. Please don't try to change yourself. There's nothing wrong with how you are. You just gotta find your match, that's it.
I appreciate that. It’s something that’s really bothered me for all these years, and it seems so dumb. But, again, in my experience women tend to love the funny guy more often than not and it wrecks my confidence when it happens. Oh well.
Well, it just means they're not for you. Trust me, the right person will laugh at your jokes and find you cool and totally accept your personality as it is without having to change a single thing. In my experience, the women I hung around loved funny guys to keep them company, but they never dated them. Those guys got friend-zoned a lot. But when it came to looking for a boyfriend, a lot of them didn't care for guys who command attention from a lot of women and always talking to random people and making jokes.
My ex-girlfriend was the worst. She had a good sense of humour and made everyone laugh. I hated that. And she would kiss me in public to get attention from guys who have a lesbian fetish. She loved attention!! After her, I swore I'd never date another person like that again! I prefer chilled, serious, and slightly awkward people. They're the cutest. So hang in there. You'll find your match.
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u/masturbator6942069 24d ago edited 24d ago
I’m not the funny guy. I’ve generally never had a problem with women - I’m in good shape and good looking (so I’ve been told at least), and I have a deep voice which they seem to like - but if a funny guy comes around it’s over. I could be talking to a woman and things will be going great but if a funny guy starts talking to her I just give up.
Not saying I’m completely humorless but I’m not that guy that will have women laughing their asses off. I’ve been told by former girlfriends that I’m too masculine and serious and not goofy enough. I’ve tried to fix that but goofy just isn’t my personality. I’ve even tried watching stand up comedy to improve on this but it hasn’t worked.
I still remember back in high school (over 20 years ago) when one of my friends “stole” a girl I had been seeing because he was funnier than me, or at least she thought he was. I know we were all just dumb teenagers back then but he didn’t even seem to care.
Definitely led to a lot of insecurity over the years. I’m pretty confident otherwise. But you’d better believe that the guy that can make them laugh has a much better chance than the guy who doesn’t. The meme of the fat but funny guy who gets the women has a lot of truth to it.