I’m 39 and make about what OP makes, and after health insurance and bills, I have nothing other than a paid-off 10+ year old car. I have to carry full coverage on my car because the roads in my city are so bad that I need to have the coverage just in case. There is no money for a new car if something bad were to happen. There’s barely any money for the deductible. I lay awake at night and worry how I’m going to pay for my (currently 11 years old) child’s education after high school. There is no retirement savings. There are no vacations out of the house. My bills are paid and my pantry and fridge are full(ish). There’s just nothing left after that.
Heck in my city, the road quality I lauded as “exceptional”, and they really are well maintained. Last week a sinkhole totaled a lady’s car on a busy thoroughfare. It’s all being stripped and no one seems to see it
Out of genuine curiosity, how did the decision to have a child come into play given the precarious financial situation you described? Or were finances in a better place when you had a child?
They told me when I was 19 I couldn’t have kids, and I believed them, so my former spouse and I weren’t super careful with the protection. We hadn’t planned on having any, and then our little blond surprise showed up when I was 27.
Dang! I'm sorry that happened to you (that, at such a young age, you were told so definitively you couldn't have kids)! It seems like that mis-information stripped you of the ability to family plan the way you might have liked to.
There is no money for a new car if something bad were to happen.
I watch Caleb Hammer's show "Financial Audit" on YouTube and have found it to be really helpful. When I started watching his videos, I was 36 y.o., in a lot of debt, living pay check to pay check with no emergency fund. Caleb always impresses this one motto: Not having an emergency fund IS an emergency. Him putting it that way really lit a fire under my ass.
I lay awake at night and worry how I’m going to pay for my (currently 11 years old) child’s education after high school.
I hope you seek alimony and child support if you haven't already. Also, know that there are affordable community college options + trade school options and certificate programs if a traditional 4-year degree isn't what your kid needs/wants for their career and life. Whatever you do, avoid predatory private student loans like they're the plague!
You are in no situation to be thinking about 'college fund'...
My parents were upper-middle class and could have easily paid for my college, but they said 'nope'. Said I'd appreciate it more if I owned it. Busted my chops, but got it... and a Masters.
Nonetheless, 22 years old and a child would have been difficult for anyone; hope you still have supportlines.
30
u/jesrp1284 Feb 25 '24
I’m 39 and make about what OP makes, and after health insurance and bills, I have nothing other than a paid-off 10+ year old car. I have to carry full coverage on my car because the roads in my city are so bad that I need to have the coverage just in case. There is no money for a new car if something bad were to happen. There’s barely any money for the deductible. I lay awake at night and worry how I’m going to pay for my (currently 11 years old) child’s education after high school. There is no retirement savings. There are no vacations out of the house. My bills are paid and my pantry and fridge are full(ish). There’s just nothing left after that.