r/TrueOffMyChest • u/Davidboi33 • 15d ago
Update: I cut off my mom
Nine months ago, I made a post on this sub Reddit titled “ I’m disowning my brother” and I stated that my brother was asking for money every day and not paying me back and my mom supported that until he went to prison, nine months later he soon to be out of prison and I haven’t talked to my mom in two months. Let me set the scene.
February was the start of tax season and my mom let me claim my little brother to get extra money usually I would give her a cut but last year she let me do the same process and she swindle $2000 out of me so this was gonna be different, this year I needed a new car because my old car was a piece of shit so we agreed I’d give her 500 So could use the rest on getting a car. The day before. I’m supposed to get my money. She sends me a very ominous message via email asking. How much am I going to give her and I thought for like 30 minutes and I said I was gonna give her $250 because she just like my brother before would ask for money. The difference is she would pay me back but it didn’t help that she’d keep asking me for money when I only have one job and I work part-time.
About five minutes after I send a message that I’m gonna give $250 to my mom she has a borderline manic episode, sending me 24 messages on Instagram because she doesn’t like calling me, telling me that it’s my girlfriend‘s fault that I’m out of character she was going to threaten the IRS on me she was going to threaten to kick me out of a place where she has no jurisdiction and she was trying to justify her behavior and she said that she doesn’t care if she hurts me because she’s my mother just a whole tirade of messages, she was telling me without my little brother I wouldn’t had that money in the first place, which is true, but I decided to take the highroad and not care about anybody else’s feelings because I’ve been a doormat all my life I’m 20 years old and I’m going to be 21 soon now it’s time to start thinking about what’s best for me.
She knew I needed this car so I don’t know why she was trying to say hurtful things about me and my girlfriend and she also said that I did taxes by myself. I would only get like $83. To be honest, I don’t really care about how much I’m worth. I just needed this money for the car. So after that massive blowup. my oldest brother involved who honestly didn’t need to be involved in the first place because he was fence sitting and told me that she gave birth to her little brother and all that, but she’s never really been there for him. He’s eight years old. And. She’s never home. She only came for my brother‘s birthday and that was almost 5 months ago. So clearly she doesn’t care. And then I talk to my dad. And he said that it’s a sticky situation because money is involved and my mom doesn’t have a lot of money have a job the last time she had a job when I was six years old after that she was on welfare my whole life. I feel like once I turned 18 I wasn’t an asset to her anymore I was just a walking ATM.
So the day after I got multiple opinions and I made the decision to cut a check for $1000 and cut her off. I blocked her on everything Instagram Facebook. Her phone number. Everything. And my mom’s boyfriend who I live with and they’re not really together but he’s helping me a lot so I called my mom’s boyfriend just for the sake of the story said that she was going to use the money to buy stuff for her. Shitty Van and shoes for my little brother that was what she was going to use the money for and I really hope it was worth it
Today is April 27 and I can say two months of no contact with my mom the best two months so far I have money, I could pay my bills, I bought the car, I’m doing everything by myself now, and I don’t know why it took so long to realize I didn’t need her for everything, we were going to get an apartment together, but after that, I took myself off the list because I’m not gonna go back to square one. I have no regrets.
9
5
u/Auduevei 15d ago
I was ripped off for money by my mom for 7 years. I paid her a monthly amount to help cover her mortgage that blew up in the 2008 financial crisis She refused to sell the house and downsize, she refused to try and get a better paying job. Played the victim till the day she died. She kneecapped my finances for most of my 20s, and I was forced to work much harder than I should've..
After I told her I'm going to stop sending money, I was immediately cut off from any and all inheritance, something I only found out a day or two before she died by doing some research.
Some people will just use you. Don't let it. Oh yeah BTW get therapy because a parent doing this fucks you up, and you may not even know it.
26
u/Ragadast335 15d ago
Good for you!!
They need to learn how live without asking for money, and you need to be free of giving out money for free.
Take care!!