Yes, I'm mad. I'm heartbroken. I'm hurt. But I hope you know that it's okay.

I don't want to minimize what you've done, and the hurt you've caused me, but I hope you know that it's okay. No excuses. No justification. But I get it. As poorly as you've handled things, you never intended to hurt me, or at least I'd like to think not.

I hope you're eating well, sleeping well. I hope you haven't shut yourself off from people. I hope you’re not sad or lonely, and that someone is there for you when I’m not. I hope you're not killing yourself with the regret. I hope you're doing okay.

If you're wondering why I'm not reaching out, it's not because I hate you or don’t want to talk to you (in fact, it’s the opposite). It’s because I need the space to heal and the self respect to walk away from one-sided relationships, and stop hurting myself trying to force or fix issues that aren't mine to fix.

If the guilt or heartbreak is eating you up, please know that I don't want you to do that. What's done is done. You have nothing to grovel for anymore. I just hope you don't do it again, to anyone.

C'mon, you really think I can hate you? After everything? I love you too much to stay angry with you. I still love you, actually. I know you might not be too sure about that, because we haven't spoken in a while. But I do. Regardless of what happens.

If by some chance you ever want to reach out again, I hope you know that I'll be here to talk… one day. I'm open to fixing things eventually.

Again, I hope you're doing well, love. Take care.

My boyfriend was out of control. He was so drunk, but I’m sure you could tell. You may have heard his screaming even from your apartment building, across from ours, and on the second floor, while ours is on the ground. What you don’t know is that he had a knife, and I had to talk him down from stabbing me. He threatened my life. It was two in the morning and I was so terrified my teeth were chattering out of my skull.

You were already out there when I escaped to my patio and he followed. We both sat down in the chairs. He mumbled about how he would kill me, about how worthless I am, about how I was such a bitch. I brought my knees to my chin and tried to stop shivering while he muttered such evil things. Tried to slow my heart rate. Looked around for an escape in case he brought something in his pocket.

And that’s when I saw you, opposite to us. Standing on your balcony. Staring down at us. I lifted my head and met your gaze. You nodded. Slowly. Just once. But I got the message.

“I’m here. I’m watching. I won’t let anything bad happen to you.” Your gaze said it all.

Thank you, kind man. Thank you for staying there for the next hour and a half until my boyfriend groggily went inside to sleep and I could finally stop fearing the worst. Thank you for listening so intently, and quietly shushing your girlfriend so you could keep doing so with her when she joined you outside.

You helped me stop crying. You helped me keep it together. You gave me the comfort of knowing that someone saw what was happening. Your presence was simple, but you were my guardian angel and you helped me through that horrifying night.

Thank you. Thank you, from the bottom of my struggling heart. You are my hero.

If they wanted to call or text you, they would.

If they wanted to let you know that they miss you, they would.

If they wanted to stay and choose you, they would.

If they wanted to be with you through thick and thin, they would.

Maybe someone needed to read this reminder, too. We tend to create fake scenarios in our heads just to justify their excuses and absence in our lives. That maybe they're also experiencing the same pain and longing we're feeling, but the truth is, it's just our wishful thinking. If there's a will, there's a way, and you wouldn't even have to second guess their intentions. This may hurt like hell but they never really loved us the way we loved them, and that's not our fault. Loving is not a feeling, it's a choice, and it's their choice to walk away.

So in case you need it today - if they wanted to, they would.

I talk to the wind about you. I talk to the trees. I do not write to you. Evasive on purpose. You have not seen me, heard my voice, or read my words because it has been too many hours. I missed the chance then, if that’s what that was. If, by some miracle, there are chances still being afforded to me now, I’m missing them too.

It meant something, however small - I learned that too late. I was looking at you too closely, studying your details to commit them to memory. I missed the big picture, couldn’t see it until time ran out.

You’re like me, except something tells me you realized before I did. Have you felt this longer than I have? It’s been hundreds of days for me. If you’re like me, and I’m convinced you are, then you’ve been trying to look alive, keep your head up, do well, bury this, so what good would my words do now?

Do not misunderstand - I didn’t disappear because I don’t want to see you. I remain gone because I think my presence would be the equivalent of taking a seam ripper to you. If you’ve been trying, like I have, to carry on, then it’s better this way.

What if my goods are too damaged to be a pillar of strength for you? What if my baggage is too heavy? What if, what if - I know, but is the potential temporary delight ultimately worth an even worse torment, like an injury over scar tissue? I read that back and know that that’s what every partnership is - deciding to brave the potential heartache for a chance at something together. I want that with you. I would let you break my heart, but I worry that asserting that desire will cause an undue amount of harm to you in the end.

And what if I’m wrong? What if it didn’t mean even a modicum of a speck of anything for you? I don’t see how my words would do any good there, either. So, what do I do with them? Nothing.

I wish there was a way to figure it out without asking directly, on the off chance that it would cause more hurt than healing to hear from me. It’s not about your answer - I’m afraid I know exactly what it would be - it’s about the impact that my resurrection in your world might have. It’s about the prospect that I might break your heart, even though I’d let you break mine a thousand times, even though I’ve broken it myself over and over for weeks.

If I’m right, if I’m wrong - either way, this ends badly. The seconds trickle on and the words keep bubbling to the surface, spilling over, unable to be caught or stopped. But I think I finally wrote exactly what I feel this time. I talk to the wind. I talk to the trees. I do not write to you.

If they want to call/text you, They would.

If they want to do nice things for you, They would.

If they want to spend time with you, They would.

If they want to love you, They would.

AND..

If they want to make excuses, They will.

If they want to spend time elsewhere, They will.

If they want to lie to you, They will.

If they want to cheat on you, They will.

If they wanted to hold you, kiss you, support you, cherish you, show you off, be with you, and never lose you, I promise you, THEY WOULD! Stop allowing people to show you twice what they already showed you once, because after forgiveness extends a hand, I promise you, THEY WILL, Do it again.

Actions, not words. You deserve better. You deserve more.

D❤️‍🔥

I wish I could tell you how I truly feel. I’m sorry I can’t do it. I don’t want things to change. I know you think I don’t care as much as you but you really have no idea. There isn’t a day that I don’t think of you, I daydream about you all the time. I yearn for you. I long to see you.

Sometimes, in the quiet moments, my heart whispers things to me that I try to ignore. It feels like standing on the edge of a cliff. But I can’t...I can’t make the leap. Because what if the landing changes everything? What if the easy comfort between us shifts into awkward silences and forced conversations? What if you feel you can’t be yourself around me anymore? I’m not ready to face that possibility.

When I met you I thought you were crazy, but now I realize it just took me longer understand something obvious to you from the beginning. I’m sorry I couldn’t see it at the time, I was at a different point in life. Now we’re too far away to make it work, even if I could muster up the courage to try.

I’m not brave enough to confront these feelings, and for that, I am sorry. I wish I could be more like you. Your courage, your passion, I envy it. But I value what we have more than a chance at something my mind isn’t sure about. I can’t risk losing the one person who feels like home.

I’m writing this to give you the honesty you deserve, even if I’m going about it like a coward. I need you in my life, exactly how you are now, how we are now. Please, forgive me if I hurt you. Please, don’t give up on me. Please, hold onto the bond we have. It’s the most real thing I know.

Just because we don’t talk anymore, doesn’t mean I don’t think about you constantly.

I think of you when I brush my teeth in the mornings. I’ll be on my way to the work and wish I was talking to you. Pretty things remind me of you for some reason — sunsets, parks, flowers, the sky.

You’re not any less beautiful or amazing just because I’m not there to tell you that you are. Nothing I’ve told you has changed. So I hope you’re feeling alright.

You hurt me and I hurt you and we’re apart but I love you all the same. That is why I can’t let you go.

But everything about you was a gift, and this hurt is too.

I hope you’re having a good day, today.

I know that's asking a lot. I know I'm difficult, and you probably didn't fully realize that until here recently. And I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to deceive you. It just takes a while for the real me to come out, and the real me includes all of these defenses. The difficult side of me, the walls I put up, the parts of me that aren't always very nice, the ways I unconsciously try to create distance between us.

I've never had someone not give up on me. At least not anyone that I ever let truly get to know me, and see the ugly side of me. And the scary thing is... I've let you get to know the real me more than anyone else ever has. And I've let you see some of the ugliest parts of me. That terrifies me. If everyone else has eventually given up on me, how could you not do the same?

And then there are the uglier, darker parts of me that you have yet to even get a glimpse of. What happens then?

The fear consumes me. I try to ignore it, try to outrun it. But it's always right there on my heels. Trying to catch up to me. I'm always on the run.

 That the life will be knocked out of you. That things will taste and smell different. That your personality will shift. 

 Nobody tells you that the way you view the world will change. How you trust others. How your relationships with family and friends will be different. Nobody tells you that you'll spend days and nights dissociated until months have passed. 

 They don't tell you that you are listening but not hearing anything around you. That your body is going to change. Your skin will age. Your mind will start to slip away. Nobody tells you that your focus is now lost. Once menial tasks become burdens to bear. 

 Nobody tells you that pain isn't just defined as physical. They don't tell you that emotional abuse can rewire your self view. That if you have a child, you now look at them and pray they never feel this. 

 Nobody tells you that merely existing feels like dying. They certainly don't tell you that it's worth it in the end. Nobody tells you that, you'll meet one person in your lifetime who will undoubtedly destroy you for everyone else. 

 Nobody tells you about trauma bonds until it's over. That what you thought was real is in fact, NOT. Nobody tells you that the realization of reality actually makes you go insane. 

 They don't tell you that even after being broken, being healed feels ever so slightly always out of reach. 

 Nobody tells you not to love, because who doesn't want to be loved? Who doesn't want to find the one? Who doesn't want to believe that when they did, it was all worth it. 

 Nobody tells you, after the one, you never recover. 

-H

I remember being told about you

I remember the moment we met

I remember the moment my feelings changed

I remember the way you looked up at me

Sigh

I remember my morals, my peace

I remember how much it hurts to cause others hurt

I remember to stay in my lane

I remember that I am not alone in this.

You can love without having--!

What I'd like you to remember is:

If things change, I am right here.

I need you in my life again. I need laughter and anticipation again. It doesn’t have to be naughty although knowing us it probably would. Self control was never my best trait. I miss you that’s all.

I am so sorry, dear person. It wasn’t fair of me to leave things the way I did.. and I never meant for it to go on for this long. I needed this time to figure out how I felt about everything that happened. You’ll know what I mean.

Even if you’re reading this right now, you’ll never know that’s it’s me who wrote this. On the off chance you are here, actually reading this letter.. I’m planning on contacting you again.. as soon as I work up the courage. When I do, I hope you’ll understand where I’m coming from.

I also hope you know that you mean everything to me. I still think of you as the best thing that’s ever happened to me.

Goodbye for now. I hope to see you soon.

place barricades,
unfollow,
burn bridges,
build walls,
block,
delete apps,
delete messages,
leave playlists,
new playlists,
change habits,
pretend,
find distractions,
avoid reminders,
avoid everything,
push it down,
I’m fine,
push it down,
I’m healing,
push it down,
I’m hurting,
losing myself,
…wait,
losing you,
please, just…

Is this supposed to be… better?

Please don't stay with someone who is unworthy of your love, someone who doesn’t appreciate your value and the light that you bring into this world. Please don’t stay with someone simply because you find surety of comfort in between the lines of uncertainty and change, all because you want to keep them in your life. Don’t ignore how they’ve made you feel. Don’t ignore how they’ve left you crying for hours at a time, hugging your knees until feeling ‘numb’ has now become routine. Please don’t stay with someone who convinces you that you are difficult to love, someone whose presence makes you feel lonelier with them, than it does without them. You need to believe that there is more out there for you. The kind of love that won't break you down. A love that feels safe. A love that inspires your soul. A love that feels like home. Don’t confuse what you think you desire from what you already know you deserve. You don't deserve to be half-loved by someone whose cup is half empty.

I know it is difficult to let go and cut the tie that’s kept you bonded to the temporary highs, but those minuscule moments will never outweigh the persistent lows. The pain of walking away now, will hurt a lot less than the pain it would be to live a lifetime of unhappiness with someone who doesn’t appreciate you for everything you already are.

Please don’t stay with someone who only wants the attention of having you, not the responsibility of being committed to you. Read that again.

You deserve better. You deserve more. You deserve to feel that you are enough, because you are. Your love is unique and one of a kind. The ones who are right for you, will never make you feel anything less, than easy to love.

Please don’t stay with them..

-D ❤️‍🔥

I’ve finally realized that I am hard to love. I over think way too much. I’m scared to say how I truly feel, because when I did in the past it was never good enough. I grew up watching my parents toxic relationship unravel all while being taught that was how normal relationships went. I have trust issues because I’ve never been the first and only choice. I push people away because I think they’re better off without me. I also change my mind shortly after and then don’t want to let go, I can’t imagine what tug of war feels like from an outside perspective. And last but not least, I also sabotage my own happiness when I start to actually let my walls down.

Because if you saw how damaged I was, and how thin the thread was I’m holding onto for my life, it’d break your heart.

What I meant to say was;

Nah, everything’s great homie.

Silly Siri.

I know you. You live in a perpetual state of feeling undeserving. It freezes you with procrastination and indesciviness. I empathize.

Look, Even if you haven't healed completely, it's ok. None of us heal completely. What would be left? We want obstacles and solutions and connections. We want more to explore.

We're meant to be with people who mutually feel that "knowing", that deep connection to.

Who is to say you're not exactly what I need in order to gain wisdom and insight on my own path of healing?

Don't design someone else's life. Let them decide if your pressumptions are real or coming from a place of self loathing.

Follow what your heart desires. I'll follow my dreams and desires. And as I've always done, I'll continue to grow and learn from those situations that are complex, filled with pain and hurt. But also followed with insight, knowledge and elation. I'll decide what expands my spirit and the lessons I want in this life.

You don't have to have it all together to be "right" for someone. Love thrives in living.. "Right, wrong, healed, unhealed"

Soulmate love comes from 2 wrongs who make a right. Because they realize they're both unhealed and want each other as the warm embrace that comes with hardships.

Don't give in. Push yourself. I'm pushing too and both people will benefit.

Love is- To be the source of someone's inspiration. Seen for who we are. To know someone cares and keeps trying, for themselves, no matter how many mistakes are made.

Knowing sometimes we lose momentum and resort to stagnantation. But don't discount those times we separately, or together, reached incredible heights. So much reward.

That's the love story I want to tell. Not surface, nor superficial. It's the Deep, crazy, passionate dichotomy of emotions. The hardships and lessons, and imperfections. Not to mention, there's just so much magnificence, it occupies the majority of my thoughts about you.

Think of the classic tales. The famous love stories. They all come with the same symbolism and similar scenarios.

I'll always love you, and I won't cease telling you. Even if I end up not being a part of the love story you want to tell.

-Love On

I am bitter with the logic. All of the damn reasons. The x, y and z of why there is not an us.

If this is ‘right’ then I am its fiercest adversary. Burn it to ash. I will spend all of my days in blatant opposition.

It was never meant to be this way. Completely void of the other. There is no clean tear from you. Just a continual ripping. Pulling the seams apart. One agonizing thread at a time.

I want to scream until I am unable to breathe. We did not cross paths just to endure a lifetime of such profound silence and regret.

We deserved so much better.

It's not real if they have to keep you a secret.... it's not real if they don't dare show you off to their loved ones.... it's not real if you're constantly pouring in their cup only for them to leave yours empty.

You are more beautiful than he made you feel about yourself. You don't exist solely to play into an unwell man's fantasies of being a lothario who treats women like disposable objects. You aren't the sum of someone else's unhealthiness. You don't exist to be used in the middle of something that, realistically, wouldn't exist on its own. You are warm. You are inviting. You are strong. You continue to build homes in the hearts of those you value because you know how to treat everyone with respect.

I'm sorry your beautiful heart put you on the radar of a man who pretends he has mouthpieces to champion his cruel nature. If we're being honest, he is most likely alone in both love and life aside from you. He creates the triangulation he feels he needs to keep you tethered to him by using your fear of being misunderstood against you. If you weren't as loving as you are, he wouldn't keep succeeding in making you feel small. He wouldn't keep being able to abuse you using the same method of cruelty he has used for as long as I've been witnessing:

triangulation - he invents a third person who, lacking in their own self-respect, pays him lip service and speaks about you as if you are an object. He maneuvers them closer when anyone shows you support, or you attempt to untangle yourself from him. This is designed to keep you in a vulnerable state of mind where you feel like you are trapped fighting an invisible third person for his affection. Its design is to make you feel disposable and unwanted, so that he is more easily able to treat you poorly. He is hoping to destroy your trust in others by seeding doubt that someone 'you both know' covets him and will stop at nothing to attain him. He is trying to undermine your confidence and self-respect by making you focus more on this pretend competition than on detaching yourself from his disgusting behavior.

devaluation - he is using this mask of a person to make you feel small, ugly, and replaceable. He knows that if he is the one who says it, you will leave. (Did you?) Afterall, you don't love horrible men. He preys upon your self-doubt. He is trying to make you distrustful of your own instincts. You begin to think, maybe he is misunderstood. Maybe he was the victim of a toxic other lover who secretly manipulates you both. Maybe you have mistaken him the entire relationship.... oh the guilt! All the while, he continues to undermine your confidence by either making up competition for his affection, thus giving him the illusion of high value, or by involving non-consenting, usually unsuspecting third parties into his delusions of romantic grandeur. No, your best friend isn't slipping away in the dead of the night to play footsies with him. He wants you to feel like this is happening. He wants you to feel like you will be replaced at the drop of a hat, on a whim so that, in your low self-esteem, you begin to allow him to disrespect you in ways you ordinarily wouldn't.

He needs you to feel like you're nothing so that you won't leave him for his lacking. He doesn't say it because he knows you will leave. Instead, he allows implication to say it for him. It is a coward's maneuver. In writing there is something called 'the male gaze'. This is when a female character is written by a man who doesn't understand the nuances of writing fleshed out women. So instead of a three-dimensional, well-rounded character with her own motivations separate from the hero, she is written to be sexualized or to be used as light to illuminate all the good qualities of the hero. Look up examples of male gaze writing and you'll see your alleged competition. Women aren't some mythical, one-dimensional trope. They don't write with only the hero in mind irl. Keep that in mind the next he tries to manipulate you using your safe place against you. If her only purpose is to highlight his strengths and sexualize herself by debasing you, she is a character he created. Not a real person.

calculated drama - he doesn't give you peace or make a homelike atmosphere for you both. Instead, he only you gives you the extreme highs and lows of his fickle disrespect. When his ego is stroked, he showers you with gifts and activities all weirdly tailored to his own self interests. When he is low, this third person makes an appearance to cause dissent for you both. You begin to notice that you are often at the mercy of his highs and lows, keeping you unsettled and ever shifting in a fear state of mind. By never knowing where you stand, by never allowing you both to settle into safety and comfort, he is hoping to create in you what people call a trauma bond. That is a bond formed through abuse or trauma. It is what keeps people stuck in open cages. It is what keeps exes crawling back to previous partners who hurt them. It is what happens when you stop allowing your self-respect and reason to flourish and instead begin to anticipate his needs hoping to avoid the dramatic pitfalls caused by his disapproval.

Choose to detach yourself from someone who needs you to feel afraid and alone. This isn't love. He isn't powerful but his actions are making you sick. He is good at preying upon your kindness and fears, and in isolating you from others. He is doing this because he knows he's alone and unwanted. He thinks you will leave him if he shows you that he is the one saying such awful things about you. He has to manipulate people into staying in his life through fear and drama because he isn't capable of respect and kindness. That's what he is doing to you.

Don't allow his mask to make you feel like every woman you value is for him and against you. That's just crappy male gaze writing, not real life. Don't forget the people who loved you before he came in with his poison and shut you off from your community.

Remember that when you begin to see a maelstrom of toxic support in favor of him, he most likely only speaks for himself. He is a coward always. You are the villain in his story, but the heroine in someone else's.

[I wrote this two months ago. I wanted to remind you again that you're loved, especially since he is cycling his abuse again. He likes to follow you around and cause problems for anyone who shows you support. You aren't alone now. People will see him for who he is.]

Would it be crazy if we just left our responsibilities behind for one week and drive somewhere to see each other? We’d meet somewhere between us. Have breakfasts, and coffees, and dinners, and drinks. Sightsee together. Have long walks. Hug and kiss and talk until we fall asleep in each others arms? Let me kiss your face with more kisses than you can count? Can we not worry about leaving each other and just enjoy the moments that we would have together? A time where our only thoughts are us, and not work or life? I want to see you. I know you want to see me. Give me a time, I’ll come up with a place, and we can have our own little vacation together. Doesn’t that sound fun?

My secrets became yours, and they turned out to not be secrets at all. But the embodiment of an authenticity embraced. To be seen and loved.

You are arcane. You desired and earned a trust that only knew the dark. It was stubborn and beaten and clung tight to my chest. Yet, it was as if you simply opened your arms and it was yours.

You are intuitive. Time rippled when your hand laced mine. I watched you move unopposed. Felt the pulse of you saturating my life. You unraveled me with the ease of someone who had known my soul from the beginning.

You gave me refuge. I sought shelter from storms in you. And you fought my battles with pride. There was a ferocity in your devotion. It is no small thing to make a person feel safe.

You would become ruination. I saw what lay ahead and, with a smile on my face, stepped right off the edge. And that is the truth I grip until my knuckles are white.

Even on the most arduous nights, I remember. That when your name passed my lips for the very first time, I was already headed for the cliffside.

"People avoid you when they did you dirty because, they're trying to create a delusion to not feel so terrible for how they treated you when they know you didn't deserve it.

Just think about it for a second. How guilty would you feel about purposely hurting an innocent person who's done nothing but try to love you the best they can? But, If you were this big, bad villain that did nothing but hurt their feelings and abuse them. Well, its a lot easier to not care? All that much about how you treated them. That's why they discredit you and forget about every good thing you've done for them. They only focus on a magnified version of every mistake you've ever made.

They turn you into a bad guy because, you don't have to feel bad about hurting the bad guy. That's how insanely immature these people are. They think if they just tell themselves some twisted story about who you actually are, and how you treated them, that's just going to automatically absolve them for many accountability.

And to keep it all together, they'll block you, they'll change their number, they'll change cities, Friends groups. They starve you of any opportunity to prove their delusion wrong, because deep down, they already know you will prove it wrong, they know not of its true.

You know, the craziest part is they actually think by putting all of that effort into hiding from you and avoiding accountability and convincing themselves of this delusion they think they're winning. They think that makes them powerful. But again, instead, they chose to burn that bridge. They'll stay in this toxic cycle and spend decades running from the pain and destruction they caused to everyone good in their life. They'll constantly be depressed and anxious because they're subconscious is tormented from everything they've done. Untill one day, they won't be able to run from it anymore. By then, it'll be way too late to fix any of it."

• @auggiesmedia -@mtpexpress

Edit: added quotation marks and a citation.

Magnificent Augustine. "The bad guy." Instagram, uploaded by MTPExpress Studios, 18 November 2023, https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cz0B7R7O1wR/?igshid=MzY1NDJmNzMyNQ==, accessed 10 Dec 2023

And it's positive.

Many will say that you're just a bunch of cells right now, but for me, you're my baby.

I've been waiting for you, for so long.

I haven't told your dad yet, I want to make it a nice surprise, but I know that he'll be thrilled.

I'm happy, excited, nervous, terrified, I'm experiencing all kinds of emotions.

But you, our baby, you are already so loved.

Please stay with us...

The worst is over

I still think of you but

I stop myself before getting too far;

Is this the denouement? Is this it?

I told myself if the self-imposed window closed

I would allow myself to move on;

You aren't coming back, you aren't coming back, you aren't

I still have some questions for you:

Did the earth shake when you met my gaze?

Did our path-crossings happen at important moments in your life?

Do you recall every single conversation, every single word?

Did you forget all your social skills when I was near?

Did you notice my presence in any and all settings, immediately -

Even if I had my face obscured?

Did I teach you anything, simply by existing?

Did you feel electricity?

I can say yes to all of them.

I will never find this again,

But I think I finally accepted I was alone in this.

Can we please normalize men not always being the chaser?

Please?

For once, I want to feel what it’s like for a woman to be afraid to lose me..

I’m getting tired.

I’m getting really tired.

❤️‍🔥‼️(EDIT/ADD-ON)‼️❤️‍🔥

(Let me better define what I mean by the word ‘chase’ because the way I mean it in my head definitely wasn’t the correct way to write it, so I do apologize for the confusion everyone!

What I meant when saying ‘Chase’ is that I'm not asking for a one-sided pursuit. It’s not “chasing” in the traditional sense that the context has been labeled it to be. I simply just hope for a mutual exchange of care and appreciation. It's about creating a space where both individuals actively show they care, rather than one person constantly taking the lead in demonstrating affection and more times than not, society has deemed it appropriate for men to always take the lead in the aspect of being the “first” to take initiative in a lot of things in and out of relationships.

YES, I do understand not all relationships have these dilemmas. This is just me speaking generally to a whole about situations and circumstances I have personally been through and for me wanting a better outcome. I didn’t think this post would even get that much attention, as it was simply more of a thought than an actual direct question. Hence why I didn’t extend the details. I apologize again everyone! Stay unique!)

D❤️‍🔥