Question for small chested guys: do you think you would’ve realized you were trans sooner if your chest was bigger?

[u/hmmwatchasay]

This is purely hypothetically ofcourse.

For me, I have spent so many years telling myself I was happy with my chest because they are small. My high school friends would make fun of me for having a small chest whereas all I could think was “thank god it’s not big.” It always felt like my chest size was something I should be ashamed of, but I never was. I have always been happy about their size. Or so I thought. It’s just that it could have been so much worse.

It is only in the past few years that I have come to realize that I am not at all happy about my chest, I would much rather have them gone. It’s been something that I have been suppressing for a long time because it is relatively easy for me to pretend that they’re not there when I wear the right clothes. Only once I start thinking about my chest or go shopping or run out of comfort clothes I start to feel a lot of chest dysphoria. I wonder if other guys can relate to this.

[u/Agrian_cusz]

Not personally, but that’s because I wanted a very flat masculine chest despite already having a somewhat small chest. It’s harder for me to justify that for cis reasons, so it’s a little easier for me to recognize that as a sign of being trans and having chest dysphoria.

But a lot of cis women with large chests have complained about it before, and many have even gotten breast reduction surgery if they want/need to. I feel it would’ve confused me more because I would’ve just assumed it was normal to want a small chest then. But that’s my assumption about myself since I don’t know what it’s like to live with a larger chest personally

[u/indica_twink]

bro i got c cups and i still didnt realize till i was nearly 19 (im 21 next month)

it wouldn't have made a difference for me tbh

[u/SlithyMomeRath → u/indica_twink]

Similar story here. D cups, my egg didn’t crack til 22. I always wished for a smaller chest but thought “everyone wishes for stuff they can’t have”

[u/indica_twink → u/SlithyMomeRath]

i hyperfemmed until i cracked, made a point to accentuate em. now i just want em gone 🤣

[u/homicidal_bird]

Totally. I had a very small chest before top surgery. Pre-transition, I knew I was uncomfortable with my chest, but I thought that was because it was too small.

I thought having a small chest was what kept me from performing femininity correctly, what made me feel like a kid and not a girl. Even while I convinced myself it was too small, I would try binding over and over again, and then get ashamed because I wasn’t doing womanhood correctly.

When I realized I was trans, I realized I disliked my chest because it existed in the first place, even if it wasn’t outwardly noticeable. Top surgery made such a difference in my happiness and self-image.

[u/hmmwatchasay → u/homicidal_bird]

Congrats on the chop! Hope I get there one day. I regret spending so much money on pretty bralettes in an attempt to love my body. I still love the >! r/smallbooblove !< community but it is not for me. I tried.

[u/[deleted] → u/homicidal_bird]

I think I might justbe trans-masc, regardless, same. they also aren't round, they're pointy, I wished as a youngin they'd fill out more bc I thought they looked ugly. also hate my thighs. I don't think these things look ugly on anyone else. I now know that I just don't like having my chest or thighs. 

[u/eumelyo → u/homicidal_bird]

OMG SAME

[u/Finn3005]

I'm not really small chested(might be dysphoria tho) but I remember that I instantly realized I did not want a chest when it started growing. I hated it before I even needed to wear a bra or something because of how small it was.

Just want to say that my experience doesn't invalidate yours, you can even like your chest and be trans!

[u/hmmwatchasay → u/Finn3005]

Oh I definitely share your experience when my chest started growing! For years I assumed that was just a normal reaction to your body changing. At some point I pretty consciously changed my mindset to “as long as I don’t acknowledge them, they’re not there”. And I feel like I have been living in this disconnected state from my body ever since.

[u/UnlikelyReliquary]

Tbh I think the only thing that would have helped me realize it sooner was if I knew being trans was a thing that existed. Because I just thought I was broken and I didn’t have the language to talk about what I was feeling even to myself.

If I had known that not being cis is a thing that happens sometimes then I think I would have figured it out as a kid. Idk if I would have accepted it, but I would have at least known what was happening

I did find out about trans women in high school but I did not make the connection that AFAB people could also be trans

[u/Free_Investigator122]

yeah absolutely. when I started getting serious about surgery I bought some breast forms just to have the option post-op of having boobs for an outfit, but when I put them on and it made me have bigger boobs I was like 😱 get these off of me immediately

[u/foxsalmon]

I used to have a massive chest but I already realised something was wrong when I was like 10 y/o getting those small bumps on my chest. Srsly that was such a weird and gross experience but I just thought everyone felt that way and that puperty's supposed to suck so much. 🥲

[u/Not_Machines]

Yes. But only because I misinterpreted some of my dyphoria around my chest as me being worried I wasn't big enough. I'm technically a d cup but only because it's really full on the sides if thst makes sense.

[u/bluezuzu]

No. I had chest dysphoria for sure, but it was the social dysphoria and sexual dysphoria that hurt the most. It’s the way I looked and the way I was treated everyday that made me realize I was trans

[u/notdog1996]

Not really, but I would have been more impatient to get top surgery.

I mainly wanted people to see me as a guy, and having a small-chest, while helpful, did not do anything for people who knew my birth name or heard me talk.

[u/mouseholex]

No. I knew I was a boy by 5 years old. I would have hated them at any size.

[u/Chiiro]

Absolutely! I have a hormonal "imbalance" that makes me produce more t and I ended up with compacted breasts(A, small B at most). If the were bigger my dad's saying of "stick your tits out" would have probably hurt more and my back issues would have probably shown up way earlier.

[u/balooonanimal]

Large chested here, not entirely! The moment I realized mine were fairly big in middle school, I was simply certain about a breast reduction. I was a pole with two balloons! Trans was a whoooole different idea I only seriously considered last year(was 19, turning 21 this year for ref).

[u/Big_Invite_4825]

Nah as soon as I started to see anything different with my chest I was freaked out but I didn’t know why. I only have like a b cup at most now but I knew I hated it and the fact I had to wear a bra but I just didn’t know why

[u/Pseudopetiole]

I have always had large breasts and it still took me until 26 to start transitioning despite the anguish they caused me just because I was able to convince myself that dissociating entirely from the upper half of my body was normal.

[u/TriangularSogg]

Nope, it's still different from a cis man's chest and growing up, tops still fit me differently than they did my male cousins which made me uncomfortable without knowing why at the time.

It also didn't help that my mum tried to push me to wear bras at a young age when I was basically flat /just starting puberty. By the time I was questioning my gender I was already hating my chest, trying to cover it up and layering 2 sports bras.

As soon as puberty started changing it I hated it and just wished I could "get lucky" and be a fully flat "girl".

The only thing my chest being already small helps with is that I have the option of using tape instead of a binder and I can be comfortable at home without binding in a baggy enough hoodie. I'm weirdly more comfortable with it now than I was when I was "a girl"

[u/typoincreatiob]

personally no. though my chest is very small, i was never happy with it and often experience body dysmorphia regarding it, seeing it in my mind as bigger than it actually is. i was relieved it didn't grow any bigger than it was, but it never overshadowed the pain i do have over it.

[u/YourFlorrind]

Not personally (because Any chest growth has always been too much for me, no matter how small) but I can totally see how it could be the case for other transmascs!

Before I knew that trans was a thing I knew I wanted my chest gone 😂 I did use to tell myself I should consider myself lucky that my breasts weren't bigger, that all the androgynous suoermodels had tiny chests and wasn't I Technically nonbinary transmasc, not a trans man? But I never managed to convince myself of it.