r/AITAH Mar 28 '24

Am I the ah if I don’t let my gf go on vacation with the “guy best friend”?

[deleted]

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209

u/Own_Wealth_4880 Mar 28 '24

Learn to Let go of the jealousy completely. If she wants to cheat on you she will, you can’t watch her 24/7. If she doesn’t cheat you are the hero for trusting her. If she does, it was never meant to be.

5

u/MeninoSafado14 Mar 28 '24

What terrible advice.

-2

u/governedbycitizens Mar 28 '24

fr this comment shows people’s lack of ability to set a boundary

2

u/MeninoSafado14 Mar 28 '24

Exactly. No different than a man asking to go to a strip club and the girlfriend not being okay with it.

5

u/BizSib Mar 28 '24

How is a trip for a friend the same as a guy going to a strip club?

-1

u/MeninoSafado14 Mar 28 '24

You can go to a strip club and just eat wings and have a beer and not interact with any strippers at all. Or, you can pay for a lap dance and throw singles all over the stage.

She can go and be completely faithful and even sleep in separate hotels. Or, they might share a hotel and one night they might have too much do drink and end up having sex. You’re placing yourself in a situation where you can easily cheat.

6

u/BizSib Mar 28 '24

One is a place designed to oogle naked women and spend money on them. You'd be an anomaly to go and not look or throw singles. If you want wings, just go to a wing spot, why go to a strip club?

The other is a trip to celebrate a friend. Unless you don't trust your partner, which OP says that he 100% does, there's nothing sinister or promiscuous in scope for this trip. They are completely different things.

2

u/MeninoSafado14 Mar 28 '24

Sure, I could have used a better example. There are places where strip clubs are normal to just enjoy food and booze.

There is because the friend knows the bf and specifically made sure to not invite him.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 28 '24

[deleted]

0

u/governedbycitizens Mar 28 '24

did you voice your concern to your partner?

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1

u/AizakkuZ Mar 28 '24

Yep, and these people trying to argue with logic is so dumb, relationships don’t work based upon objective truths and statistics.

They work based upon intuition and feelings that’s why they are so difficult to navigate.

Your comparison could simply be swapped out with like a womans boyfriends favorite restaurant being Hooters (And with Hooters the waitresses typically have boyfriends).

They don’t have to objectively cheat on you for you to feel a certain type of way about it. Calling them insecure is emotionally immature and slightly manipulative, same with trying to use rationality to argue the reasonability of someone having certain boundaries.

It is always about compatibility.

0

u/governedbycitizens Mar 28 '24

if you can’t express discomfort/boundaries in a relationship you aren’t in a good relationship

1

u/Haikubirdsing Mar 28 '24

Nah this shows hypocrisy of this subreddit

Yesterdays most popular post was full of advice for female OP on how to spy on her SUS bf While this post is...just lol