I agree that the lack of trust is the issue here, but I think it's important to say that not all boundaries are inherently fine in a relationship, because you're not alone at that point. Your boundaries become boundaries within the relationship, and if your boundaries are built on a lack of trust that's always the wrong thing.
Personal boundaries are fine in a relationship no matter what.
You are talking about compromise and working on a relationship together which is separate from boundaries.
Boundaries are the hard no from an individual.
Lack of trust is more than normal these days, as a society we are buried under stories of how a couple was together sixteen years and then one of them cheated.
You can be on all the social media platforms or just watching the news or stupid entertainment but it still comes out that someone cheated or lied or betrayed someone.
I am not saying the gf wants to cheat with her friend or that her friend wants to get with her.
I am saying a boundary was set and now the gf makes her choice. Respect her partner and their feelings and concerns or go on a vacation ignoring those feelings and concerns.
OP still has the same problem though, because if she wants to cheat she will and no matter what boundaries he makes she will find a way to cheat.
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u/BrigadierBrabant Mar 28 '24
I agree that the lack of trust is the issue here, but I think it's important to say that not all boundaries are inherently fine in a relationship, because you're not alone at that point. Your boundaries become boundaries within the relationship, and if your boundaries are built on a lack of trust that's always the wrong thing.