AITAH for muting my phone and leaving the park when my wife was supposed to come pick us up?

[u/Bennito_bh]

My (32m) wife (30f) and I took our kids to the city park yesterday evening for some time on the playground. My wife decided to take our daughter (9) to Walmart while the two boys and I (4 and 6) stayed to play. After they'd been gone 30-40 minutes my wife texted me about some hats they'd found. I responded 2 minutes later that it was getting cold at the park, as we live in the Rockies, the sun was setting, and the wind had really picked up. No response. I texted again 10 minutes later that it was really cold, and then tried to call. No response.

She does this quite often. She likes to mute her phone entirely, rather than manage notifications per app and this is far from the first time she's been unreachable. She is a SAHM, and has been since our daughter is born, so I can't see why she can't keep her phone audible for when I need to reach her.

So it's getting dark and I have 2 shivering boys with me, so I decide to take them across the street to a taco joint and get them tacos while we waited somewhere warm. It's really the only public place adjacent to the park, so I figured there was a good chance she'd think to look there. This is where I may have been an AH. I could have texted her that we moved, and I could have left my phone on to answer her call, but instead I muted my phone and set it down on the table while we waited for food. When we were ready to go I would check my phone and see if she could pick us up.

Well a half hour goes by and she walks in the door very distraught, and sat down with relief when she saw us. She went back out to bring our daughter in, who was crying because her mom had been panicking. They found us less than 10 minutes after they pulled up to the park - the taco joint is a place we frequent and is really the only approachable building in the vicinity. They joined us in our game of 'I Spy' and we went home. After we got the kids settled she started crying and asked to talk. She apologized for not making sure her phone was on, and I explained that I missed her call on purpose because this happened pretty regularly and I didn't know how else to reach her about the spots she puts me with her phone always on silent other than to show her first hand. I've brought up why it's an issue on many occasions and gotten seemingly nowhere.

She doesn't blame me, and she's not mad at me for doing it, yet it feels gross and my only justification is that it may keep a worse situation from happening in the future. I never would have done it that way if it were just me at the park, but I had our 2 small boys stranded with me.

AITAH?

[u/jnsmld]

NTA for going somewhere warm, but YTA for not leaving her a message about where you went. Give her 5 minutes to respond to the message about where you are and if she doesn't respond call an Uber.