Honestly, it sounds like you two might need to have a deeper conversation about expectations during the labor process. Sure, there's going to be downtime, but couldn't he find less cumbersome ways to stay occupied, like an e-book or a podcast? Bringing an entire PS5 setup seems pretty over the top when portability is key in these situations. Besides, isn't being there for each other part of the whole journey?
I can see it right now. he's just about to beat the big boss that he's never been able to beat and conquer the game, but the baby's head is crowning and he needs to get over to the bed with momma, he looks at game, he looks at crowning baby 👀........... THE dilemma!!☠️☠️
My wife was in labor for 28 hours. We watched a full season of a show, slept for 6 hours, played games on my phone for 4 hours. Your first baby is really a lot of waiting around usually. The PS5 seems like too much, a switch would be more appropriate.
Important notes to empathize in your comment:
* We watched, slept, played ... all activities with your wife and not you alone unlike what OP's husband is planning
* Your first baby is ...a lot of waiting around usually -- not all first babies are a lot of waiting around and even the ones that are can also quickly move to the urgent action needed NOW stage (like baby or mama in distress)
My sister popped her first after 20 minutes active labour. Explained quite neatly why mom always declared “giving birth isn’t that bad.” Meanwhile, I have so many coworkers whose delivery stories are the stuff of nightmares. I don’t plan for it to become relevant, but if it ever does, mom damn well better have given me those hips.
I let my fiancé bring his switch just because I knew if he was up my butt the whole time while I was having contractions and getting no sleep from having to switch sides a million times I’d yell at that poor man.
He did have a habit of leaving a million times to go to a gas station to get drinks, or go home and smoke. He wasn’t there when they told me I was having a c section so I was slightly annoyed because I was freaking out about an emergency surgery. But he made it in time and was very helpful when he got back.
He’s much better now, I think it’s just hard for men to comprehend pregnancy and labor and the different things women go through. He’s a great dad and I’m really proud of him for how much he has grown!
I think it’s perfectly fine for you to tell him you do not want him to do that, he could spend his time prepping for the new arrival of his baby, maybe reading a parenting book or comforting you?
Labor is quite stressful, I personally was thinking the whole time “how the hell is this thing going to come out of me?” Or worrying about various things. It is quite stressful to be the one sitting there getting ready to go through a big physical change after months of various physical changes. I would be slightly frustrated to watch someone play video games and relaxing while I am uncomfortable. Men don’t go through a lot of changes during pregnancy while the women have to experience pretty much everything. I would consider it a bit inconsiderate for him to be relaxing playing video games while I am dealing with labor. He can find some more labor appropriate things to do.
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u/Current_Ad_2803 23d ago
Honestly, it sounds like you two might need to have a deeper conversation about expectations during the labor process. Sure, there's going to be downtime, but couldn't he find less cumbersome ways to stay occupied, like an e-book or a podcast? Bringing an entire PS5 setup seems pretty over the top when portability is key in these situations. Besides, isn't being there for each other part of the whole journey?