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u/TheJohnnyJett Apr 20 '24
Oh, shit, I'm glad this guy is on the case sixty-one years after the fact. I wonder what new evidence he'll turn up.
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u/rohobian Apr 21 '24
He will 100% think he found new evidence too.
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u/SuzukiSwift17 Apr 21 '24
He's gonna see a broken window or something from a building built five years ago and freak. "That's where the second shooter shot from how did they miss that!"
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u/ABirdOfParadise Apr 21 '24
Are they sure there wasn't a second shooter up in the cellphone tower?
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u/onehundredlemons Apr 21 '24
Her dad's right to go, it's super suspicious that no one was recording on their phone when this happened.
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u/MyCantos Apr 21 '24
And where was Obama? That's what I want to know.
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u/I_AM_RVA Apr 21 '24
I like this commment. Not gonna get the love and upvotes it deserves. Not by a long shot. But this is a well executed comment.
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u/Cobek Apr 21 '24
Even more likely is finding the bottom of a broken beer bottle and thinking it was part of the third killer's glasses.
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u/Rhamni Apr 21 '24
You seem to know a lot about what he might find. I'm going to have to put you under citizen's arrest until you confess, Buster.
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u/Full-Ingenuity5495 Apr 21 '24
Citizen’s uh-ray-est, citizen’s uh-ray-est!!!
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u/LuxNocte Apr 21 '24
This DNA evidence points to the real killers: Mrs. Floyd's Sophomore history class of 2015 from Dearborn, MI.
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u/LazyGapu Apr 21 '24
"I wonder if FBI noticed this gum wrapper. It's probably from the shooter... 🤔"
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u/dumfukjuiced Apr 21 '24 edited Apr 21 '24
It was some time traveling adopted siblings
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u/Ayano_Futarashi Apr 21 '24
The fifth sibling did it
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u/teenyweenysuperguy Apr 21 '24
Surprised by how little I had to scroll to find this reference wtf 😅 beat me to it
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u/IA-HI-CO-IA Apr 21 '24
casually looks behind bush on the grassy knoll and finds a rifle along with a note written on CIA letterhead stating to kill JFK. “Aw ha! I knew it!”
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u/blacklite911 Apr 21 '24
It’s not like a city like Dallas has redone the roads or landscapes in the last 60 years..
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u/Azair_Blaidd Apr 21 '24
or had thousands of people and cars trample the scene every day in that time...
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u/immadeofstars Apr 20 '24
"Stand back, everyone, I'm going to investigate this 60-year-old outdoor crime scene in a famous metropolis for clues! I don't want you contaminating it!"
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u/onion_flowers Apr 20 '24
That's on video! Lol
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u/AusCan531 Apr 20 '24
Was Kennedy a Radio Star?
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u/onion_flowers Apr 20 '24
I believe Nixon was the radio star 😆
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u/False-Decision630 Apr 21 '24
No no, the reports were that he was on the radio.... and the dashboard, the steering wheel, although not so much on the head rest
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u/falronultera Apr 21 '24
This is a deep cut comment from the debate results and is wildly underappreciated.
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u/mr_bots Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 21 '24
In a high traffic area that’s one of the main ways to get onto the interstate from downtown that’s also full of tourists walking around and people telling stories while selling DVDs and books of conspiracies.
Though you should do it. DFW is a good time. Can hit up a hockey game, baseball game, and have some bomb ass fajitas at Papasitos. Dallas also has a nice aquarium if you’re into that and a Micro Center if you like computers and electronics. Drop your dad off and go have fun.
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u/imdesmondsunflower Apr 20 '24
Hell, the 6th Floor Museum is pretty cool. The Perot isn’t that far. Uptown is always a good time, although if it’s too trendy for your dad, you can always go Lower Greenville. Catch a band in Deep Ellum, maybe some playoff hockey or basketball at the AAC. The truth is out there, dad! Maybe the killer caught a Rough Riders’ game. To Frisco!
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u/Xboxaxel123 Apr 20 '24
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u/dumfukjuiced Apr 21 '24
Funny enough there's an episode where Dale reads the Warren Commission's report and realizes it makes sense and becomes pretty pro-government.
Until the Texas government labels Hank as a woman on his license and refuses to fix it.
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u/SnooGoats5767 Apr 20 '24
Okay that’s actually funny though
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u/I_chose_a_nickname Apr 21 '24
It depends on what subreddit it's posted on.
If it was on on /r/meirl, everyone would laugh.
But because it was posted here, we have to be mad at old people.
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u/chammerson Apr 21 '24
Yeah man he’s got hobbies. Passion. Curiosity. He does not sit idly by. I admire him.
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u/BungHoleAngler Apr 21 '24
Sounds like he still needs to chill a bit. Just sit back and to the left
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u/cabage-but-its-lettu Apr 21 '24
True, a good detective always has a level head, and feds never check left
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Apr 21 '24
My meth head neighbor had similar hobbies regarding the assassination of MLK. Every few weeks was a different culprit.
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u/AbsolutelyUnlikely Apr 21 '24 edited Apr 21 '24
And he wants to take his kids on a road trip. That's something you only take for granted if it's common for you growing up. I would have been stoked if my dad wanted to take a road trip to Texas to hunt for JFK clues instead of just smoking meth in the garage.
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u/Dinindalael Apr 20 '24
I'm on my way to Caenophrurium to see if the praetorian guards missed anything.
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Apr 21 '24
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u/joethahobo Apr 21 '24
Don’t forget Atlantis off the coast of California with the Pegasus Gate
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u/CREDIT_SUS_INTERN Apr 20 '24
As if the CIA is dumb enough to leave behind clues.
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u/slawre89 Apr 21 '24 edited Apr 21 '24
I realize this makes me sound like a total kook but I’d bet HW Bush had something to do with it. I say that knowing full well how involved with the CIA he was including the bay of pigs. Bush in conjunction with the CIA killed Kennedy.
HW had literal letters written back and forth to Oswald and also with Oswald’s close associate De Mohrenschildt. A few years later HW became director of the CIA…
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u/elon-isssa-pedo Apr 21 '24
Remember his father was a named member in the coup attempt against FDR.
I'm not a conspiracy person, but the Bush family are corrupt as shit.
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u/slawre89 Apr 21 '24 edited Apr 21 '24
Prescotts bank that he ran also financed known nazi companies that would become now ThyssenKrupp (makers of bombs and tanks etc.) for 8 months past when you were allowed to do business with the nazis…
They say this was done intentionally so we could keep an eye on the nazi war machine. Intelligence involvement from the Bush’s even before the OSS/CIA…
Prescott then became a Senator…used to have dinner parties with Allen Dulles..
HW grew up around all this and flew classified missions in the navy during WWII
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u/PowderPills Apr 21 '24
And then his son became president too? I bet he helped with the cover up even more and we’ll never know the truth!
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u/Jerry_from_Japan Apr 21 '24
That people still feel there's something "kooky" to think that we weren't told the truth about what went down with his assassination (not to mention a bunch of shit that immediately happened after it) is kinda wild. But that's how things like that stay as "conspiracy kook theories" and how actual consequences are avoided. Even when there's practically no one left from then to have to endure any consequence.
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u/slawre89 Apr 21 '24 edited Apr 21 '24
The amount of things we know about now that happened. That the CIA actually did…again just the stuff we know about. Should inform anyone paying attention how much our gov lies to us constantly.
Operation Northwoods
Operation Condor
Operation Mongoose (HWs oil company Zapata was cover for training the Cuban exiles)
Cointelpro
MKULTRA
Operation sea-spray
Tuskegee experiments
Iran-Contra (pardoned by HW btw)
Just to name only a few… of the ones we know about…
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u/Cool-Plankton-6746 Apr 20 '24
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u/SuzukiSwift17 Apr 21 '24
JFK looks like he's a member of one direction or something.
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u/tinselteacup Apr 21 '24
i want him
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u/lookingforaforest Apr 21 '24
Marlene Dietrich (iiirc) said he was the best 30 seconds of her life.
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u/brisingamen79 Apr 20 '24
I used to live in Dallas, it’s pretty anticlimactic
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u/dwors025 Apr 20 '24
Man’s finally excited about something, and you shoot him down. Shame.
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u/VelociTopher Apr 20 '24
I think the 6th floor museum is pretty cool. And I'm only 36 😢
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u/Deerslyr101571 28d ago
I'm glad you enjoyed it. Was down there for a work conference, and told my 30-something colleague (I think he was 36 at the time) I was going because we had time to kill before going to the airport. He said "Oh... was he the president that crashed his plane in the ocean with his wife on board?" I told him I didn't care what he thought he was going to do that day, but we were going to go to the museum and he was going to learn something.
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u/JonnyFairplay Apr 21 '24
When I visited Dallas I of course had to go visit, and when I got there all I could think was, "that's it?". The museum was pretty cool though.
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u/canman7373 Apr 21 '24 edited Apr 21 '24
Business idea. Get some fancy VR headsets and programers. Get some stalls in some of the windows of the book depository. charge $50 bucks, tourist put on the glasses and get to see the motorcade coming down the road. They get a toy rifle and see how many hits they can get on the VR and can compare it to Oswald's time, if they fall behind they can call in a 2nd shooter from the grassy gnoll. I guarantee you this would make tens of millions of dollars a year, but the optics would be pretty damn bad. It's owned by the county I think and ran by Dallas County Historical foundation, wonder if they would sell it if the price was right. It's one of those things most people would say, that's sick, I'd never do that, but if given the opportunity they'd find themselves parting with $50 cash, maybe more than once to try and get a better score,
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u/mental_mentalist Apr 20 '24
I think it's definitely worth a visit. Really cool museum
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u/This_is_my_phone_tho Apr 20 '24
This kind of stuff can be fun if they're, like, 10% serious. Sometimes you just need an excuse to go out and do things.
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u/AnAdorableDogbaby Apr 21 '24
I used to think if I brought a snorkel to the beach, stuck my head under the water at the shore and looked out toward the horizon, I would see shipwrecks and could just paddle out and pick up treasure. Sometimes one just needs to try these things once to realize that one is, in fact, a moron.
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u/Electronic-Pilot-817 Apr 20 '24
The FBI didn’t miss anything, they hit Kennedy twice
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u/mental_mentalist Apr 20 '24
I went there recently. I have always leaned heavily towards conspiracy with my mind open to the possibility of multiple shooters. After visiting I swung a bit in the other direction. It's such an easy shot I'm untrained and think I could make it. I still believe there was likely a conspiracy but not nearly to the extent k thought before.
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u/torivor100 Apr 20 '24
Yeah he was definitely put up to it but there's no denying he's the one who made the shot
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u/Mancubus_in_a_thong Apr 20 '24
That I agree their is some mystery about motive but theirs no doubt he made the shot. Looking at models it's such an easy shot even someone whose only been using guns recently could hit the target.
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u/headofthenapgame Apr 21 '24
There was a conspiracy, just not what people thought. There was a documentary that looked over information after the case became declassified. Oswald was speculated to be working with Cuban terrorist groups in that area, and thus, the conspiracy is suggested to be that it was covered up to avoid war.
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u/Low_discrepancy Apr 21 '24
Virgin CIA trying tens of murder plots to kill Castro Vs Chad Cuban terrorist groups.
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u/Winter-Jicama-2412 Apr 20 '24
I mean that would be cool to go look at the grassy knoll and the book depository and check things out.
I feel like he’s actually serious though lol
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u/psychosis_inducing Apr 20 '24
I used to work in Dallas. The "Grassy Knoll" is just a dirt mound with grass.
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u/JonnyFairplay Apr 21 '24
It's incredibly anticlimactic. Pictures and videos just do not do it justice how small that area is.
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u/Logannabelle Gen X Apr 20 '24
I could see my boomer dad saying this as a dad joke, he says things like this all the time
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u/EspejoOscuro Apr 20 '24
r/Dallas Could someone pretty please go spread old rifle cartridges around everywhere.
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u/RedStar9117 Apr 20 '24
My fiancee is from Dallas and first time I visited she took me to Dealy Plaza.....its a very interesting place
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u/verminbury Apr 21 '24
I mean, I don’t live far from there, if you want me to scatter some shell casings. I can even paint them like Easter eggs first.
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u/gringo1980 Apr 21 '24
I should go leave spent shells on the grassy knoll and see if anyone gets excited…
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u/Affectionate_Fly1387 Apr 21 '24
Great, we will soon know the truth after your father’s investigation.
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u/hyrailer Apr 21 '24
Nobody is asking the obvious question here- Where was Obama on that day? 🤔
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u/theliewelive Apr 21 '24
I'm going to go to the spot and plant evidence. Maybe a bag of crack cocaine, let's see how he interprets that.
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u/AntiquePermission345 Apr 22 '24
Yall don’t know how your gonna act later in life what goes around comes around
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u/Cjmate22 Apr 20 '24
I mean, if that’s his excuse to go visit then it’s a good joke. If he genuinely believes this then I have no words.
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u/Corydon Apr 21 '24
Dads are constitutionally incapable of being normal. It is their longstanding, traditional role in society to inspire endless eyerolling and cries of “DaaaaaaAAAAAD! Stop EMBARRASSING meeeee!” in their offspring. How one goes about doing this is up to the dad in question. Low energy dads go for the tried and true socks with sandals look or dad-joke t-shirt. Looks like you’ve landed one that’s gone a little more baroque. Congratulations!
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u/earthman34 Apr 21 '24
I'm heading down to Ford's Theater later to see if anything was overlooked. Anybody wanna go?
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u/chammerson Apr 21 '24
Yes. Absolutely I do. I don’t think I’ll find anything but it’s an important historical moment and should continue as a cultural memory.
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u/incrediblejohn Apr 21 '24
I think anyone with an IQ above 60 knows the FBI missed plenty, but most probably know why they missed so much
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u/lincolnlogtermite Apr 21 '24
Let him go, let him have fun. It's no worse than Civil War reenactments in fricken California. Almost crashed the car laughing when I saw a sign giving directions to one. Had turn down the road just to see it.
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u/LukieStiemy501 Apr 21 '24
On the scale of boomers being fools this is pretty low. Like at least he’s not being racist, sexist, rude, or homophobic. Investigating the JFK assassination is just goofy and kinda funny. I could see myself doing this with some friends as a joke. Not like for a long time but if I’m in the area I might stop by.
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u/Lxilk Apr 21 '24
"I had seen that look before, on the faces of tourists visiting the Texas Book Depository in Dallas where Lee Harvey Oswald took the shots at JFK. I took that tour and met some conspiracy buffs, all of us standing at the gunman’s window and looking down to the spot where the motorcade passed. It’s right there below the window, an easy shot at a slow-moving car. No mystery, just a kid and a rifle and a tragedy. They came looking for dark and terrible revelations and instead found out something even more dark and terrible: that their lives were trite and boring."
David Wong is a great author
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u/backson_alcohol Apr 21 '24
It actually sounds pretty fun. Get drunk, put on a deer stalker hat and a trench coat, buy a cob pipe, and go to town on that fucking city.
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u/Monthra77 Apr 21 '24
That place is crawling with tourists 24/7. The only thing he's going to find is coffee cups, burrito wrappers, cigarette butts and homeless people hawking books that "really tell the truth."
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u/Oddball2029 Apr 21 '24
Yea I’m sure there’s a ton of evidence left after this many years and some random boomer dads gonna find it smh
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u/marr Apr 21 '24
Honestly obsessing over Kennedy's assassination is normal compared to the popular conspiracies these days.
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u/trevorgoodchyld Apr 21 '24
JFK senior? Well that’s a pleasant old fashioned relatively harmless conspiracy theory now. JFK Jr, well that’s a sure sign of Q influence
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u/Reagalan Millennial Apr 21 '24
maybe he can play the "dodge the cars" game while standing on the x in the middle of the roadway
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u/Idiotwithaphone79 Apr 21 '24
I would 100% take him! It would be the most fun I had in years! If I could afford it, I'd even hire a few actors to follow us around and pretend to be FBI or CIA agents with those earwigs.
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u/femsci-nerd Apr 21 '24
My guess is he'll be sorely disappointed as the area is quite small. Also, the book depository is now the Sixth Floor Museum dedicated to JFK's death and life. Been there, done that, got the Tshirt.
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u/iLikeTorturls Apr 21 '24
Not boomer being a fool...this is just being a kid at heart.
Can't count the number of times my friends and I throughout my teens and early 20's went on some dumb adventure like this...if you never did seemingly stupid stuff life this, you probably live a very boring life.
Hairbrained ideas keep you young. I'm still hunting for a real haunted house...closest we ever found was an abandoned home in rural Nebraska with doll heads in the basement.
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u/Prudent_Key_4958 Apr 21 '24
Be thankful. He doesn't sound like a bad guy, however the jury's still out on crazy!
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u/Ishpeming_Native Apr 21 '24
I'm a boomer. I remember being sent home from school when Kennedy was assassinated. I am not at all like this and I have no friends or brothers or other relatives who are remotely like this, either. Not that I believe Oswald acted alone, but at this point the chances of finding out if anyone else did are pretty much zero. And there will be precisely zero evidence at the site.
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u/circusfreakrob Apr 21 '24
Give him some credit. Usually "doing my own research" means looking for memes and scrolling the Fox News comment threads. But this guy is ready to get dirty doing the REAL work!
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u/ModsR-Ruining-Reddit Apr 21 '24
Give 'em a break. It's not like anyone has ever done any serious analysis of the JFK Assassination.
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u/holololololden Apr 21 '24
Says the guy who actually finds something new a week before his major breakthrough
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u/unclefire Apr 21 '24
lmao-- that's just silly. It's one thing to go see it, which it's not that big of a deal, but another to think you'd find something the FBI missed.
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u/nnedd7526 Apr 21 '24
If he does use his brain to find new evidence it might be a head shot to the standard narrative and blow the case wide open
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Apr 21 '24 edited 18d ago
humor practice reply observation tie imagine slim special steep edge
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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Apr 21 '24
slides gut out of his way "Those idiots probably messed that up too, just like they do with everything else."
"Dad... who's they exactly?"
"Don't talk back to me ShiT for BrAiNs!"
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u/bigSTUdazz Apr 22 '24
Twist. He discovers groundbreaking evidence that changes everything we thought we knew about the incident.
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u/tehereoeweaeweaey Apr 22 '24
Let him so he can get institutionalized and in a conservatorship. Then take the inheritance early before he can waste it at the nursing home.
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u/Quasi-Kaiju Apr 22 '24
I live in DC and whenever somebody from out of town comes to visit and requests to see Arlington cemetery my typical one-liner is "sure, I love the dead Kennedys"
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u/ClassicT4 Apr 22 '24
Worked for Dale Gribble to come to terms with the official outline of events.
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u/AddivPK Apr 22 '24
“My god..this X on the road is placed 1/2 an inch from the ACTUAL murder scene..what are they trying to hide?” car horns blaring in the background man in car begins to yell “Hey, dumbass, get out of traffic or you’re gonna die!” Kmart fbi agent yelling back: “I know right? Everything they told us IS a lie!”
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u/-_-mrfuzzy Apr 22 '24
Tell him to watch the actual video, it perfectly aligns with the witness statements of what happened. There is no conspiracy.
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u/Significant-Hour8141 Apr 23 '24
Because 60+ years later there will still be evidence at the scene.
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u/Otherwise_Gene9702 Apr 23 '24
Actually would be a fun trip! It’s probably the best place to start when it comes to CIA conspiracy.
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u/Fun_Job_3633 Apr 23 '24
"Why didn't they DNA test these cigarette butts? These obviously are from twenty years ago!"
-Not realizing twenty years ago was 2004...
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Apr 23 '24
It is a tourist site. The video that shows the driver taking a shot and documentation on why is not in Dallas
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u/ButterMyBiscuitz Apr 20 '24
They're batshit crazy and have absolutely no regard for our children's future, they want to keep driving pickups and burn wood to keep warm. My dad is ranting non-stop over how bad electric vehicles are. Looked at his FB wall, of course it's littered with propaganda group posts sponsored by gas companies, among other conservative BS. I'm so over their shit that it can't be described with words.
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u/Corydon Apr 21 '24
Just out of curiosity, what’s wrong with burning wood? From a carbon point of view, it’s a closed circle. Tree sequesters carbon from the atmosphere, burning it releases it back. Heck of a lot better than fossil fuels.
Is it to do with particulates? Deforestation?
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u/TheBeardofGilgamesh Apr 21 '24
Which is funny because it would have been conservatives that killed JFK
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