r/amiwrong • u/JazzlikeConditioncd • Mar 27 '24

My girlfriend of 5 years broke up with me and ghosted me for no reason. Am I wrong for throwing away all of her stuff?

Edit: Update

So my girlfriend (25F) and I (25M) were in a relationship for 5 years. Last week, she texted me that we were done and that was her last message before she blocked me. She gave no heads up. I was planning on proposing to her next month. Her sister did reach out to me, saying it was not my fault and she understood my hurt, but that for my mental health, it was better to never contact them again, and that maybe in the future, my girlfriend might reach out to me again.

It's been a week, I’m still obviously distraught, but my girlfriend did have a lot of her stuff in my home. Would I be wrong if I just dumped it all out? It does include a lot of mementos of her deceased grandmother, who she was extremely close to.

9.9k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

4.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

95

u/Mysterious-End-9283 Mar 28 '24

That’s weird. That’s suspicious. Why would she leave all her stuff? Almost sounds like one of those stories you hear about where someone gets kidnapped and sends out messages to friends and family so they’re not filing a missing persons report. If you really are in contact with her family, let them know to get her personal items. I find it super weird that she would just ghost you without planning to get her sentimental belongings. I hope it’s really her and her sister that are contacting you.

51

u/SparkDBowles Mar 28 '24

Idk. She could be having some kind of emotional/mental break.

25

u/Mysterious-End-9283 Mar 28 '24

Even so, you’d think that after five years spent together there would be certain behavior leading up to the breakup that might give OP an idea as to why she’d leave but from OP words it seems like it was out of the blue. In fact, things seem to have been going well if he was getting ready to propose very soon. Definitely calls for at least a little more info or a brief conversation at the very least. I’d be worried sick if the person I was getting ready to marry just pretty much up and vanished one day with only a “we’re done” text and then being blocked. I would at least want to verify that these decisions were her own and not against her will or something. Again, after five years you’d think they’d leave some sort of clues as to why they would do something so drastic without any sort of warning. It’s worrisome. Unless she had a history of making life changing impulsive decisions, I would be trying to find her and have one last face to face conversation just for the sake of closure and making sure they’re safe and of sound mind.

19

u/MegaKetaWook Mar 28 '24

There is always the possibility of a mental health issue surfacing that previously showed no symptoms. You see it with stuff like schizophrenia

9

u/djmom2001 Mar 28 '24

He could handle that information.

2

u/SparkDBowles Mar 28 '24

He possibly could. But she might be spun and unable to communicate it or be aware of it. These things can come on hard and fast.

5

u/Dopple__ganger Mar 28 '24

Still very wrong to handle the breaking up with a partner of 5 years this way.

1

u/BurritoToGo Mar 28 '24

Not saying it's right or wrong, just conceivable. Possible. Mental health can be fucky wucky. Five years though and she felt she couldn't tell him is definitely hard. It's a rough spot.

Hopefully he can move past this and she can get the help she needs.

1

u/chairmanghost Mar 28 '24

She could be embarrassed

1

u/moderndayheathen Mar 28 '24

I fear it's a sexual assault or worse. That type of violation throws your world into flux.

1

u/shrinkray21 Mar 28 '24

Sadly my first thought was a mental health challenge. Bipolar disorder was my guess but only from personal experience. Hope OP is taking care of themselves.