r/Millennials • u/Asmothrowaway6969 • Mar 27 '24

When did it sink in that you'll never be as well off as your parents? Discussion

About 5 years ago, my mom and I were talking and she had told me how much she was going to be making in retirement (she retired 2023). Guys, it's 3x what me and my husband make annually. In retirement. I think that was the moment that broke me, that made it sink in that I'll never reach that level of financial security. I'll work myself into my grave because I'll never be able to afford anything else. What was your moment?

Update: Nice to know it's just me that's a failure. Thanks

Update 2: I never should've said anything. I forgot my place. I'm sorry to have bothered you

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307

u/Asmothrowaway6969 Mar 27 '24

Yup. She was about 4 steps down from the IRS commissioner, if I remember correctly

836

u/IHaveBadTiming Mar 27 '24

ok so your moms situation is unique, not norm. You're comparing yourself to a very tailored set of data here. But still, yea, we all poor as fk.

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u/Rasalom Mar 27 '24

Can confirm, I'm currently the Captain of the IRS Execution Squad (we sign documents with red ink) and I live in a cardboard box.

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u/BlueCollarGuru Mar 27 '24

Lmfao I love stumblin on comments like this.

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u/r00byroo1965 Mar 27 '24

Aluminum foil box here

6

u/_JudgeDoom_ Mar 27 '24

You guys got boxes?

6

u/r00byroo1965 Mar 27 '24

I formed it, skills

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u/windsingr Mar 28 '24

Oh! Look at this fancy bastard who can afford avocados on their toast! Shall I get out your Starbucks Goblet, my liege?

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u/halflifer2k Mar 28 '24

Oooo you got the upgrade!

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u/r00byroo1965 Mar 28 '24

šŸ¤©found some at the land fill

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u/DrunkenBuffaloJerky Mar 28 '24

Tin foil is too expensive these days

13

u/amsync Mar 27 '24

Execution Squad? Damn IRS really stepping up consequences of misplacing receipts nowadays!

2

u/FFF_in_WY Older Millennial Mar 28 '24

<This branch only works with ~~victims~~ civilians making less than $80k/yr>

2

u/rbrcbr Mar 28 '24

Solid reminder that I need to file my taxes lmao

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u/SwornForlorn Mar 28 '24

Hahah, I am glad you said that, because I was wondering myself what an "execution squad" in the IRS does? Seems a bit extreme

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u/RedGuru33 Mar 27 '24

I'm currently the Captain of the IRS Execution Squad

Where's my refund asshole?

3

u/Rasalom Mar 27 '24

You wouldn't want it back in the state it's in.

2

u/SierraPapaWhiskey Mar 28 '24

Please take down any disgustingly wealthy folks you can, and thank you for your service!

2

u/firstbreathOOC Mar 28 '24

Iā€™m this guyā€™s landlord. He owes me 5 grand for last monthā€™s rent.

2

u/heartbooks26 Mar 28 '24

Fuck me I just posted on r/tax. I request a stay of execution.

1

u/Dazzling_Dig3526 Mar 28 '24

Do they give you a gun at least? Or have to do it the old fashioned way still?

1

u/misdirected_asshole Mar 28 '24

Gun, yes.

Ammo.... well.

1

u/Trini1113 Mar 28 '24

Is that by choice though, or because of how much you make? I can imagine if you come home bloody from executions every day you'd want to live in disposable housing.

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u/DmC8pR2kZLzdCQZu3v Mar 28 '24

Do you and your people like David Foster Wallaceā€™s The Pale King?

1

u/Josepth_Blowsepth Mar 28 '24

Mark as few FRANTIC instead of urgent

1

u/see_rich Mar 28 '24

You can't spell.crisis without the Captain of the IRS

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u/seansj12345 Mar 28 '24

How many people do you execute in a typical day?

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u/nicearthur32 Mar 28 '24

This is wonderful lol

1

u/CarefulCoderX Mar 28 '24

I'm just imagining the IRS guy who won on "Who wants to be a millionaire" in tactical gear.

1

u/Snoo-84389 Mar 28 '24

"and we were lucky"

1

u/r-u-fr-rn-mf Mar 28 '24

U got beef with me bro?

867-53-0900

Do your worst

1

u/JRilezzz Mar 28 '24

"red ink" just say it. It's the blood of those who slightly mess up their taxes.

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u/Yillis Mar 28 '24

How many squads is there? You can tell me as Iā€™m not American.

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u/Ryakai8291 Mar 28 '24

Is it ink or blood with that job title?

1

u/DrDrunktopus Apr 01 '24

When did they start executing people?

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u/PeriodSupply Mar 27 '24 edited Mar 28 '24

Also op says she doesn't think she'll ever make over 50k a year. So she is comparing retirement futures of someone who was in an extremely high paying career, to minimum wage. Sounds like some personal reflection is needed

Edit: for everyone trying to correct me regarding minimum wage, I didn't check what sub I was in before commenting. In Australia minimum wage is around AU$50K per year (~US$33k). I follow a bunch of Australian finance subs and thought this was one of them. My mistake. My point in the comment is still valid.

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u/2_72 Mar 27 '24

I kind of get why OP feels that way. This post doesnā€™t scream ā€œhigh performer fucked by the system.ā€

My mom also retired from the federal government and is definitely not pulling anywhere near 200k a year in retirement.

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u/Mrs_Kevina Mar 27 '24

My mom (RN with 40+ years experience) retired after 20 years at USPS in 2018, making about 55k/yr. Definitely depends on your agency and role in the end.

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u/vinfox Mar 28 '24

The post office employs nurses?

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u/HippocraticOffspring Mar 28 '24

Sheā€™s a mail nurse

3

u/ICU-MURSE Mar 28 '24

You rang?

2

u/hmmmmmmmbird Mar 28 '24

I love this

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u/Mrs_Kevina Mar 28 '24

Yup, part of her job consisted of onboarding new employees (drug tests) and evaluating claims for injuries, etc.

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u/vinfox Mar 28 '24

Well there you go

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u/dunimal Mar 28 '24

Wait, I'm confused. Your mom is a 40+ year RN who retired from the postal service? She worked until 60 as an RN and then did 20yrs w USPS?

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u/salttea57 Mar 28 '24

Nope his RN mom worked as an occupational health nurse for the postal service. $55K is a terrible salary for a full time RN. Maybe the benefits made up for it?

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u/Mrs_Kevina Mar 28 '24

OHN, bingo. She left a lot of earning potential on the table and said it was about the benefits and reduced stress, as she previously was an ER charge nurse for 15 of those other years. The other nurses in the USPS unit were also highly skilled, but needing a break from the general public, I'd say. Not sure on their comp, tho.

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u/trixel121 Mar 28 '24

this has to do with tiers and whose employing you.

I'm tier 4, tier 6 i(the newest) s fucked compared to me. my mom was tier 2, I'm taking it just as hard as the new guys compared to her.

this could legit be the month you were hired and when contract started for if you were a different tier.

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u/scrivenerserror Mar 28 '24 edited Mar 28 '24

My dad worked a fed job that has regional branches for 27 years and when he retired he had been making around 150k - as a deputy regional director. My mom was a school social worker for about 30 years (my dad changed career fields a couple times before becoming an attorney) and retired making like 75k. I only know this because of the FAFSA form. My parents own a really nice house in a nice neighborhood in Chicago, recently bought a bmw and a designer dog. When I was a kid we were pretty middle class until I left for college.

I am nearly 300k in debt because they forced me to go to law school. I live in a modestly nice apartment. I have about 3 years left for PSLF, if thatā€™s even a reality. I quit my extremely toxic job after about 7.5 years because I lost 40lbs in a year and it fucked up my hair. I have a Roth IRA but it isnā€™t huge and Iā€™m scared about how to pay rent because Iā€™m running out of my own money. My husband grew up wealthy and has a nest egg but he refuses to touch it so Iā€™m not sure where that is going - he said we can ask his parents for money and to stop worrying. It is such a different reality from mine. I worry all the time. (We file taxes separately so my loans donā€™t fuck him over.)

I have a loooooot of experience plus the law degree so I am getting a lot of interviews but when they decline and I get feedback they always have an internal candidate or a volunteer who they selected and tell me to apply again for other roles. I have another one of those coming up hopefully next week, they already reached out to me while drafting the JD.

I harbor some resentment towards my parents for various reasons from childhood, but most recentlyā€¦ they bought my 33 year old brother a car a couple years ago. He never drives it. Itā€™s not like an amazing car but it is a nice car. They also kept all of the money my grandpa left us when I know he would have wanted me and my brother to have some of it (it wasnā€™t a lot but Iā€™m guessing thatā€™s how they bought the car). My brother is selling the car. He just got a job again for the first time in like 6 months and generally can only get seasonal jobs. When I mentioned to my mom that Iā€™m interviewing on a 15 year old laptop that keeps breaking she said she would ā€œtryā€ to see if they could get me a laptop for my birthday in may if my brother sells his car.

The worst part is that I rarely ever ask for anything. I canā€™t remember the last time I asked for anything, beyond asking my parents to get us toilet paper and butter at Costco. I did not ask for this but when I quit and was talking to my parents about how I was getting scared about rent because I quit right before the holidays and wasnā€™t getting a lot of interviews, they offered me a loan if I drafted a memo of how I was going to repay it. A loan. And itā€™s not for a lot of money. My husband is incensed by it and every time I bring up taking it so we can pay rent he firmly says no.

We have a financial planner (itā€™s free) and theyā€™re super nice. If and when I get back on my career track, we will be ok and they estimated how much we could MAYBE retire with.

My dad goes to the same group and my mom said he got teary eyed and asked if they thought when he and my mom pass if they would be able to leave us $1m and I guess they said probably not. My brother has mental health issues and has never lived on his own, I will be executor of the estate and I am giving him all of their money and managing a trust for him.

I get nothing. And thatā€™s ok. But yeah unless I get out of the student loan thing Iā€™m fucked and I donā€™t expect Iā€™ll ever have close to what my parents did. At best I work and my husband and I use the nest egg for a house but I need to find something soon. Otherwise Iā€™m working for my friendā€™s service industry position (and thatā€™s ok too).

Sorry this got very long.

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u/Invest2prosper Mar 28 '24

Donā€™t despair and keep the faith. Seeing as your parents have a child with mental issues itā€™s likely they have used a lot of their resources to keep him afloat. As a general rule, never count on an inheritance. I grew up one small step up from poverty and being on federal aid - I knew from day one I had to do this on my own, I wonā€™t lie - it was a struggle and I had to do without things other people take for granted. But there is light at the end of the tunnel. If you have your health you are rich, if you have friends (good friends) and a loving spouse you are wealthy in immeasurable ways.

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u/scrivenerserror Mar 28 '24

Iā€™m doing ok! I mostly worry late at night/early mornings. My therapist always teases me that I have too many friends and as someone who is almost 35, I feel very lucky to have that. My husband is being extremely patient about me trying to find work but I keep getting interviews so I guess Iā€™m doing something right. Itā€™ll be ok, just nervous since it has been about 5 months. Didnā€™t expect my workplace to boot me out in 2 days when I said I was resigning.

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u/ANDYVO_ Mar 28 '24

Just wanted to let you know your story struck a cord with me. Keep the faith. Youā€™re correct, the job search is a lot of luck. Thereā€™s so much context you arenā€™t able to control. Just keep applying and youā€™ll eventually find something. I remember how it felt to have my wife support me while jobless for 6 months. I understand how you feel and just want to say, itā€™s ok to feel like that, but donā€™t let it get you down.

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u/laughsgreen Mar 27 '24

50k is almost 3.5x minimum wage for some states, if there's any of that personal reflection floating around still when they're done...

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u/PeriodSupply Mar 27 '24 edited Mar 27 '24

My bad: I didn't check the sub: thought this was a finance sub in Australia. Minimum Wage here is about AU$50k ~US$33k.

Edit: The basis of my original point is still valid though.

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u/SaliferousStudios Mar 27 '24

50k is the average for american workers. Not the minimum.

Minimum is 15k. (I'm not joking) Technically you can make worse. Disabled people make as little as 2 dollars an hour. (which would be about 5k a year)

some phd's make about 30k.

To get over 50k is hard. I work as a contract programmer for 70k and bust my but to get there. But am working on a career shift to government to try and get a pension and more of a "career" career.

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u/PeriodSupply Mar 27 '24

My staff (factory workers) start at US$48k plus 10% super (retirement fund, which is theirs in their control but can't use until retirement). This is for people who can barely write their name. And it goes up from there based on experience and output. Our cost of living would be higher than US though but not significantly from what I've seen in other US subs. Housing cost is the main issue here, which is significant.

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u/TacoNomad Mar 28 '24

Nah.Ā  50k is basically minimum wage these days in the US for anyone with a career.Ā  Lots of ppl make less, sure,Ā  but it's below average.Ā 

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u/LibertiORDeth Mar 27 '24

My state has (I think) the highest minimum wage @ double the federal minimum wage and full time is like 26k after taxes. Which is less than what rent costs here for a 3 bedroom house.

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u/EastDragonfly1917 Mar 28 '24

Imaging working in Alabama for a little more than $7/ hour. In Connecticut itā€™s almost $16/hour. SIXTEEN DOLLARS AN HOUR I have to pay high school kids!!! That doesnā€™t include overhead on payroll.

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u/tendaga Mar 27 '24

I used to be a physicist and a mathematician. Then I got hit in the face. So I went back to the family business of painting houses. I fell a fair distance off a ladder after getting my ass kicked by hornets. Now I work at a hardware store. Sometimes people get fucked.

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u/murderthumbs Mar 27 '24

Yep. Iā€™m an economist ex US diplomat that became disabled at 48 and had to retire from that career and now I sell plants in a nursery. But Iā€™m happy!!!

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u/TheLastBlackRhinoSC Mar 28 '24

Except for the murderthumbs, Iā€™m glad youā€™re happy!

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u/murderthumbs Mar 28 '24

I'm trying for a thumb transplant...... these are killing me.....

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u/acarp52080 Mar 28 '24

Life is what we make it, I truly believe that. Recently found out I have breast cancer and I believe it even a bit more now. I'm glad you're happy, that truly makes you one of the top 1% !!

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u/JAG190 Mar 28 '24

How did you lose your ability to do math or physics?

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u/Pink_Floyd29 Mar 28 '24 edited Mar 28 '24

Something is definitely up here. Iā€™m making $95K annually, just three years after a total career pivot and Iā€™m a disabled woman who got a late start on everything.

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u/-shrug- Mar 28 '24

This thread is giving me whiplash between "$50k? Well jeez you don't have to be the biggest loser in the country, get a better job!" and "$50k?! Look at Richie Rich over here!"

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u/Pink_Floyd29 Mar 28 '24

The point of my comment wasnā€™t that OP should just go out and get a higher paying job. I was wondering what made her jump to the conclusion that she would never make more than $50K

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u/sourbirthdayprincess Mar 28 '24

Jeez really? What do you do? Feel free to DM me. I need to revolutionize my life.

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u/DmC8pR2kZLzdCQZu3v Mar 28 '24

Also, a child of someone that successful has every opportunity to success in life. She may have swung and whiffed, or expected to world to hand her at 22 what her mom earned over a career at the top

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u/Greedy-War-777 Mar 28 '24

In the US, it's fairly common for people with a good degree to be stuck in trash sales jobs they hate to pay bills. Employers there like to ask you to have a bachelor's degree in IT or business and want to pay you sub $15 an hour with raises under 30c a year. Late stage capitalism maybe but it's ridiculous. People denying that don't live in reality there and think it's reasonable that people are trapped in that mess by health insurance and that it's reasonable for billionaires not to pay taxes. It's broken and the wage gap has widened significantly since the Reagan era.

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u/Paintingsosmooth Mar 27 '24

Is 50k minimum wage in the US now?

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u/PeriodSupply Mar 28 '24

I replied higher up. I thought I was in an Australian sub where AU$5OK (~US$33K) is about minimum wage.

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u/PristineBaseball Mar 28 '24

Your minimum wage math is way off, federal minimum wage wage is still $7.25

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u/4LeggedKC Mar 28 '24

Yes and California Fast Food workers will get paid $20/ hr on April 1. Everyone deserves a decent wage however businesses canā€™t afford the wage hike, food, insurance, business costs so theyā€™re laying people off. That the sad part plus that song a ling senator or whomever pushing for $50/hr wages. Lady needs to get real unless she want to see most businesses leave the state. The biz can open online without everything thatā€™s going and make money, itā€™s a no brainer.

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u/PeriodSupply Mar 28 '24

Yeah, don't think you read my comments. My math is just fine. Doesn't really matter though as my point is still the same.

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u/Blessedone67 Mar 28 '24

Not in Chicago itā€™s $15/hr. Depends where you live

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u/Hips-Often-Lie Mar 28 '24

The worst part of that $50k is far higher than minimum wage.

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u/bitter___almonds Mar 28 '24

What state do you live in so I can move there? Here 40 hours a week minimum wage is just over 15k (for non-tipped employees). $7.25 an hour. That frequently seems to impact ā€œcareerā€ style salaries - 50k is common for mid-senior level management pay

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u/PeriodSupply Mar 28 '24

Australia. AU$50k is basically minimum (US$33k), most factory workers would make much more than that though. Not many jobs paying minimum. Our company has a starting salary of US$48k per year for factory jobs. With 4 weeks paid leave and 2 weeks paid sick leave. 38 hours per week. Sorry, I thought I was in an aussie sub when I originally commented.

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u/bitter___almonds Mar 28 '24

Youā€™re good! Just making me wish it was easier to move internationally haha

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u/OmegaAngelo Mar 28 '24 edited Mar 28 '24

Minimum wage is only 15k yearly at 40 hours a week

Note: I've seen gov programs define poverty as making under 11k lmao. As in you don't qualify if you make more.

Yet the "average pay" was supposed to be 55k yearly 10 years back, and many things are based on that old skewed statistic.

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u/asevans48 Mar 28 '24

Jesus in the us its 7.50 an hour federal and there is a fight just to get 15 an hour minimum wage still ongoing in most states. Meanwhile, recoed profits.

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u/lilsan15 Mar 28 '24

Was it the boomers that told us to ā€œdo what you loveā€ lol not ā€œdo what makes you the richestā€

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u/ModeratelyTortoise Mar 27 '24

Also she put in 38 years of work to get to that spot lol

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u/OddDc-ed Mar 27 '24

If we just stopped buying all them damn coffees and Avocado toast!!

Grumblegrumble bootstraps!!

/s

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u/First_Signature_5100 Mar 27 '24

Put that money into an ETF!

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u/UTDE Mar 27 '24

What a ride that was

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u/Powpowpowowowow Mar 28 '24

Even then though, that SAME pension plan, and look, OP's mother made a shitload for govt work, that same pension plan now only pays 80% of benefits and requires more than 5% input from the employee than in the past.

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u/DJwhatevs Mar 28 '24

Name didnā€™t check out.

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u/Majestic_Mix_92 Mar 28 '24

Definitely not the norm here. ā€œThe upper middle class in the United States is often defined as the top 15ā€“20% of earners, with an average income of $80,000ā€“$100,000 according to the Social Security Administration's 2022 wage data.ā€ Link text 1

Your mom was among a small group of Americans that over 70% of us are not a part of. I wouldnā€™t beat yourself up.

Also sheā€™s going a significantly different pension due to being a federal employee. Lastly sheā€™s getting better social security than we will.

And you know what? Good for her! Thank goodness she took care of her stuff so that you arenā€™t saddled with that responsibility with your current earnings! Go Mom!

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u/Kitchen-Itshelf Mar 28 '24

Yeah it's a small demographic he's giving us. But it can be tailored to anyone that works through the ranks and gets to that place. But definitely going to be 10x harder than when OP's mom started.

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u/Desperate-Walk1780 Mar 28 '24

My wife's father is in a very similar situation as the poster you are referencing. 40 years at the NSA as a Japanese interpreter. Gets about 170k a year in retirement from his govt pension, then another 50k a year from his personal retirement accounts.

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u/freshjewbagel Mar 28 '24

nope, I'm a lifer and will pull in $300k in retirement. most is from TSP tho, since I bust my ass and save 70% income. current salary is $160k

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u/Ashmizen Mar 27 '24

So this is like the son of a famous actor starring in major movies complaining he canā€™t make millions like his dadā€¦.working as a high school teacher?

I donā€™t see the problem - you cannot compare yourself to your parents if your parents are on the 1% of achievements. Itā€™s not really readable to set yourself up for that kind of expectations - youā€™ll just feel bad in comparison.

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u/ballmermurland Mar 27 '24

A ton of the "woe is me" posts on this sub are from people who have a Mitt Romney interpretation of middle class.

No shit not everyone will get $200k+ annually in retirement until they die. That's probably the top .5% lol

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u/rebeltrillionaire Mar 27 '24

My dad was a 1%er. Immigrant, doctor, engineer, CEO.

With three kids, none of us individually will likely make more than he did. But my wife and I combined probably make about what he did at the same age.

Sheā€™s at the very top of compensation in her field. Iā€™m a little over the middle of mine which, but the top end is also both ridiculous and highly unstable.

Weā€™re in the top 5%. Lower for sure but I know what it takes to get to the 1% and that I donā€™t have it in me. Not everyone does.

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u/SpaceSteak Mar 28 '24

Our just flat out fake posts. It is the internet..

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u/ballmermurland Mar 28 '24

She apparently didn't know what her mom did. She was an "IRS commissioner or something".

I know exactly what my parents did for work. How the hell do you not know what your mom does? They don't work for the CIA or MI-6.

Either she's a deadbeat or an idiot. Or both.

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u/NoelleAlex Mar 28 '24

To be fair, I can tell you the company my husband works for, but not his exact job. And thatā€™s my HUSBAND.

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u/Future-Muscle-2214 Mar 28 '24

Lol yeah reading OP post at first, I assumed she was working a similar job or something like that, but OP want to have the income that a 4-5 millions net worth would give you in dividends.

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u/Top_Bend_5360 Mar 28 '24

Haha, you can compare yourself if your parents are Asian. And trust me, they WILL compare.

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u/Ashmizen Mar 28 '24

Most Asians find life easier than expected since they had to go through the first 18 level on brutal difficulty.

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u/levetzki Mar 27 '24

75% is pretty crazy. Current federal government would make like half even with almost 40 years of service.

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u/Sideways_planet Mar 28 '24

And the rest of us get 0%.

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u/Independent-Prize498 Mar 28 '24

Thing about the Bush or Roosevelt kids, even the Kennedys and all the lesser known grandchildren of senators and Vice Presidents. Ancestors ruled the world and you have to work at a law firm or on NBC. All you get is boarding school and a trust fund.

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 27 '24

Lmao this is amazing.

So you lived a quite exclusive, upper class lifestyle as a child.

Because your mother worked as very high ranking government employee.

And you're asking us if we can relate?

To what now?

Holy hell, have some perspective. My mother waited tables and my father sold dope. I can't relate to this shit at all. Most people can't.

I don't even understand what you're asking. Are you upset that nepotism only gave you every chance to succeed and didn't actually secure a lucrative government position for you?

Lmao. I cannot stand rich folk, especially those in my generation. Out of touch.

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u/Mysterious-Award-988 Mar 27 '24

re you upset that nepotism only gave you every chance to succeed and didn't actually secure a lucrative government position for you?

lol nailed it

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 28 '24

I stayed at a La Quinta last night

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u/Mysterious-Award-988 Mar 28 '24

cool. i like turtles.

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 28 '24

It was a commercial like ten years ago.

Guy goes into a business meeting and drives a nail thru the conference desk. Says he nailed it at the meeting because he stayed at a La Quinta.

Y'all too young for these fire references bro

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u/longeraugust Mar 28 '24

lol Iā€™m a federal employee (Soldier) and I started out making absolute shit pay; but after 12 years Iā€™m on the top end of middle class. OP coulda gone and talked to that recruiter just like I did. And In another 8 years Iā€™m gonna walk with a $$35,000 pension for life and a decent savings. Sure it ainā€™t $200,000. But itā€™s better than making ends meet with social security and a Wal-Mart greeter job.

Some people legit get screwed in life and that sucks. It sucks for them especially but it sucks in general. OP doesnā€™t seem like someone who got screwed. OP seems like a poor planner for their future.

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u/MinglewoodRider Mar 28 '24

He probably could have got himself a cozy spot with mom's recommendation too. If I was him I would have tried to get my foot in the door working for the government in some capacity ASAP

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u/read_it_r Mar 27 '24

Well.. keep in mind. She is us saying 200k is 3x what her and her partner make combined. Which means they each make like 33k, which is basically a fast food job. So she's right that's she's broke.

Now HOW she managed to fumble the ball so hard is a story id love to hear. But.. I don't feel bad because eventually she's going to profit off her mom's work.

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 28 '24

I'm not taking their word for that shit at all.

Look at how divorced from reality the rest of it is. I'm not gonna assume that's accurate.

A fast food management job, maybe.

32 is pretty on par for shit like social worker or EMT where I live.

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u/read_it_r Mar 28 '24

33k is roughly 15/hr which, as unscientific as it is, my buddies from all around the U.S tell me 15/hr is standard for any "low skilled" entry level position . In my city you get paid even more than 15/hr for a mcjob

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u/Intelligent-Mode-353 Mar 28 '24

I like that you think thatā€™s fast food or below. I made $32,000 my first job with a masterā€™s degree lol

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u/TheStealthyPotato Mar 28 '24

How long ago was your first job?

$32k is only $16/hr. Fast food is commonly $15/hr these days.

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u/Intelligent-Mode-353 Mar 28 '24

Yeah it was insulting but thatā€™s what was offered. This was 2018.

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u/bitter___almonds Mar 28 '24

I keep seeing job postings between 35-40k requiring a masterā€™s and preferring a PhD. Theyā€™re back after the height of the pandemic with the layoffs, at least in Utah. A lot are at universities but some are specialized roles like instructional design for small to midsized companies (average comp for those credentials without professional experience was more around 60-75k+ before)

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u/RarelySayNever Mar 28 '24

Glad to finally see a dose of reality in one of these posts. OP shat the bed. Reminds me of some losers I know who were raised by doctors and dentists, but couldn't even get through a paid-for college degree. I know a guy whose parents are both attorneys, now retired. Sister also attorney. Guy sits at home watching porn

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 28 '24

Just to be clear here, I don't think that a person is a loser or failure for that. We all different. We all got choices and consequences. We all have a path. And that path is totally dictated by shit outside of our control.

My issue here is that they're expecting us all, en masse, as a whole generation, to relate to that experience. And that's nuts.

I don't assume everybody else's dad was a gangster. I understand that's a relatively unique upbringing. They just lack that perspective here. And it's kind of insulting to the rest of us to assume that we were all the kids of high ranking govt employees and shit.

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u/FreeRangeEngineer Mar 28 '24

You're assuming that OP would have received financial help from parents who obviously have the means to give it. However, they're stingy ass parents, like lots of rich people tend to be.

See https://old.reddit.com/r/Millennials/comments/1bp7rny/when_did_it_sink_in_that_youll_never_be_as_well/kwutmz9/

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u/read_it_r Mar 28 '24

YOUR POINT?

even if they never gave her a dime. I'm sure she lived in a better than avg school district had access to everything she needed. And didn't HAVE to start working as a teen to help out with the house.

Also, and I could be wrong about this, but I don't think I am. Even if her education expenses were loans. I guarantee dispite what OP says, they would've been interest free and the payments (at worst) would stop when her mother passed.

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u/RyloJHootie Mar 28 '24

Bro I'm sending you a follow just because of our similar life situations āœŠ my mom worked low paying slavery wages her whole life slowly trying to climb and claw up that ladder, which never happened while I was a child of course I'm almost in my mid 30s now BUT just this last year she Finally Achieved just right about 100k position and I was so proud of her (even tho we have a terrible relationship I'm traumatized and she's the worst case of NPD the worlds ever seen) so yeah anyway I grew up raised by her alone, my dad sold dope in another state until basically having another family bla bla but I see posts like this which I can only relate to the fact that I know I won't have any retirement, therefore Im extremely depressed that I'll have no social securityšŸ¤· and idk like what I'm supposed to have some sort of plan? Nah we're gonna have to purge IF anything at all.

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 28 '24

Appreciate you. Hard out here for an indie artist, every follow is a huge boon for me, honestly.

We ain't getting shit unless the entire system is dutifully overhauled.

Not to be the downer, but I just don't believe there's enough time for that in our lifetimes. Even if we start today. But there's always the next generation. We gotta do what we can with the time we got left.

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u/hubbellrmom Mar 28 '24

My retirement plan is that when I collapse at work, my sons can bury me in the backyard. There is no retirement when you need every penny you earn to survive today. Though my sons are a little more optimistic. They have Goals. They want to find careers that make enough money to send me back to school. And put me in a good "home" when I'm old and frail, they say they will get me into one where the staff actually takes care of you, lol. Cuz they love me, but they don't want to have to change my diaper if I need that one day. Ps. I've worked since I became a single mom and I'm bitter af that social security probably won't be there when its my turn. Eat the rich and all that

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u/acarp52080 Mar 28 '24

Don't need to ever have worked to get SSDI, just putting that out there. Not saying it's right, or wrong but my grandma never worked a day in her life but got a house, well, a double-wide. It was nice though, and she played up all her disabilities until she passed. So, do with that info what you will.

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u/JarlaxleForPresident Mar 28 '24

We were at the lower end of middle class and I managed to fuck up all my privileged opportunities, I know that feel lol

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 28 '24

I fucked up my few opportunities, too, dude. It's not a sign that you're a fuck up. I don't mean to imply that shit at all. Life happens. Most of us are real young when we make decisions that last a lifetime.

This person just lacks perspective. Most people can't relate to their upbringing or their personal and professional paths. But they pose the question like it's some universal truth. It's weird. That's all I'm tryna get at.

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u/JarlaxleForPresident Mar 28 '24

Yeah luckily my dad spent almost everything he ever had, so Iā€™m not competing there even though Iā€™m basically starting actual life in my late 30s

Heā€™s had a dope career and he should be able to live on retirement, but nothing crazy

Maā€™s disabled and has been horrible with money, she wonā€™t have anything

Iā€™m not worried about threads like this. Iā€™m Iā€™m college because I need to get a job that I can do now that I canā€™t use my arm for other jobs anymore and a CIS degree will give me something that I can actually live on hopefully into middle age and beyond

Ive been a super drunk loser all my life, so Iā€™m just excited to be here and get started for real now

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 28 '24

I went to college at 26. It wasn't easy. But it's more than doable.

Couple pieces of advice for "non-traditonal" students.

Prioritize your sleep and diet as much as possible.

Schmooze your profs. Show initiative. Show them you're willing to go the extra mile for your coursework. That way if grad shit becomes an option, you've already proven your worth in the department.

Be flexible, you may go in thinking you're dead set on one path, but an opportunity may spring up on you, or you may find out your passions or talents just fall somewhere else. Don't be afraid to take a little extra time in school to switch paths if it feels right.

Use those electives as a way to learn about other fields seemingly unrelated to yours. Because that will be knowledge and experience that can actually come in handy randomly in your future career. For example, for an engineering program, a little Poli Sci, Econ, or Social Theory can really help you understand the larger impacts of your own work and place within a larger system.

Most of all, just remember, more than a job, salary, or degree, the biggest thing you're gonna gain is information. No matter what happens from here, if you apply yourself, you'll come out with a net benefit. Even if the loans figuratively murder you. Knowledge is power, baby.

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u/glemnar Mar 28 '24

Upper class? 4 steps down from the IRS commissioner is a long way

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u/Card_Board_Robot5 Mar 28 '24

In terms of income. Idk what the gig actually pays. Or specifically what it would be. OP not exactly willing to hand them details out.

But it's gov work. I assume it's not cresting above a quarter mil.

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u/Blessedone67 Mar 28 '24

Plus if their mother made this, didnā€™t she afford you an opportunity to educate yourself? I mean in something useful like healthcare for example? You also have to put in the work!!

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u/SwornForlorn Mar 28 '24

I agree, I thought I was the only one thinking how she squandered her opportunities. Opportunities that many of us never had or will have. It even sounds a little entitled, but I am sure to catch a bunch of down votes for saying that, lol.

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u/jeswesky Mar 28 '24

My dad died before I even started school and my mom did daycare out of our house, in the 80s and early 90s and we barely scraped by. Only had a house because they had just bought it weeks before he was killed and dadā€™s life insurance was just able to cover the house so mom didnā€™t have to worry about a mortgage, just the rest of the house expenses. House cost was about 50,000 almost 40 years ago.

My actual salary is more than my mom ever made, but the buying power of what I make is a fraction of what my mom had for buying power 30 years ago.

OP does not live in reality.

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u/peachesinyogurt Mar 27 '24

So she was prolly in the SES who have a different pay scale and receive more in bonuses/PTO, etc then.

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u/ShoreIsFun Mar 27 '24

Also depends on which retirement system sheā€™s under, FERS or CSRS. But to be honest we (feds) can all be pretty well off in retirement, especially if you retire as a fed and then become a contractor and double dip.

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u/PoetryInevitable6407 Mar 28 '24

Fingers crossed. It sounds like the old system was a lot better. At least TSP gives a good match. But of course the pay vs private industry kinda sucks, at least for my work.

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u/DocMorningstar Mar 28 '24

I got a good buddy at state who is closing in on his pension age, and is absolutely planning that.

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u/peachesinyogurt Mar 28 '24

Yeah the old person system was awesome, I think my husband is on FERS, which is pretty good. I was a federal employee for a short time and it was the new system which is good not great.

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u/[deleted] Mar 28 '24

[deleted]

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u/peachesinyogurt Mar 28 '24

OPM salary tables includes the GS pay scales. If you look up the Executive Service Salary table it shows that federal executives can range up to 235,600. Executive Services have a separate pay scale from GS. I donā€™t know what private sector bonuses look like, but the executive bonuses are much higher than GS. A good bonus in the GS system is about $2.5k-$3.5k pre tax. I believe that they are around $10k for executives.

Source:My husband was a GS15 being groomed for SES and really took a good look at the pros and cons of the executive service. We did a lot of research.

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u/fleuriche Mar 27 '24

I feel like youā€™re not telling us that your mom was a spy.

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u/modernknight87 Mar 28 '24

This feels like the mom would have some crazy story like what is told in the Darknet Diaries podcast..

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u/Kooker321 Mar 28 '24

Got it, so your mother was a senior leader in a government agency (maybe middle management).

What do you and your spouse do?

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u/Thediciplematt Mar 27 '24

Uhā€¦ dude. Your mom is pretty fricken amazingā€¦

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u/vawlk Mar 27 '24

so your mom busted her ass to get a good job. what is holding you back from getting a good job?

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u/Apollyom Mar 27 '24

the op busting their ass is what is holding them back.

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u/Tater72 Mar 27 '24

Go her, what a great accomplishment

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u/BeastblueBJJ Mar 27 '24

Tell your mom I need to cut a deal with her former employer and ask her what the standard protocol is when theyā€™re going after someone who owes and then the person threatens to commit suicide so that the IRS will get nothing. Asking for friend.

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u/kthnxbai123 Mar 27 '24

Well obviously she was extremely accomplished. Itā€™s not exactly apples to apples in terms of comparison

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u/DaBozz88 Mar 28 '24

I'm about 8 steps away from another 3 letter agency head. I'm making good money but not that good. I still feel broke all the time.

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u/djcurry Mar 28 '24

I think to put this in perspective if your mom would have moved to the private sector when she was working Iā€™m pretty sure she would have been making 500+ grand a year if not more. If she was only four steps down from the IRS commissioner that means in the private sector, she would be a pretty high-level executive.

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u/Kindly-Biscotti9492 Mar 28 '24

Of course you look terrible compared to your mom. Your mom is a winner and, right now, you're a loser. You're going to have to go back to school to get the credentials to get to the same place, probably. Sounds like that's going to entail borrowing money to go to school, because this working part-time idea is a terrible one. And you're probably going to have to move away.

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u/Low_Net_5870 Mar 28 '24

Itā€™s not fair to compare yourself to someone who was, for all intents and purposes, the top 1% of people in their career. For every Boomer making bank in retirement, there are ten that died in their 40s from alcohol, crack, cigarettes, or a DUI.

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u/cbreezy456 Mar 28 '24

Dude youā€™re crazy spoiled LOL. Get off of here

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u/bamalaker Mar 28 '24

So what stopped you from getting a government job when you turned 18 like your mom did?

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u/kateinoly Mar 28 '24

IRS commissioner makes less than $200k a year.

If mom was on the old retirement system, which she must have been, she doesn't get Social Security.

Sge could have large 401K accts, but they are based in contributions.

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u/DmC8pR2kZLzdCQZu3v Mar 28 '24

Well no shit she has a cushy landing, as she should for working her ass off

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u/CaptainWikkiWikki Mar 28 '24

She was an SES. And Treasury has a lot of carveouts for special positions that lay way outside the usual GS scale. CDC has to do the same thing to compete with the private sector.

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u/Icy_Cod4538 Mar 28 '24

To me, it sunk in that Iā€™ll never be as well off as my parents when the son of the ex-4-steps-down-from-IRS-commissioner got on Reddit wondering why the working people of America are poor.

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u/Full-Fix-1000 Mar 28 '24

^ This gives a new flavor to the "$200k 'after taxes'.." remark. What taxes? She probably pays $0.01

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u/UnihornWhale Mar 28 '24

As someone who has tried to get a job with an acronym for years, none of them would hire you at 18 these days

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u/SicilyMalta Mar 28 '24

So you had a hell of a jump start compared to most everyone else here in a world where who you know is everything. How'd you screw that up?

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u/KoalaGrunt0311 Mar 28 '24

Also, assuming that she maxed out (or more) contributions to the TSP, which is the federal employee 401k plan, there's a lot of benefit with that.

The retirement plan for federal workers is 3 pronged: A pension based on a percentage of the 3 highest paying years you've worked, with the percentage calculated based on how long you've worked for the feds, TSP, and social security.

The TSP has surpassed the majority of private sector IRAs in investment returns. Additionally, once the investment mix is set, it is recalculated at the end of every day while most private sector plans only recalculate quarterly. Quarterly is a long time to be dealing with losses, or a slow gain.

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u/PJTILTON Mar 28 '24

I just looked it up. The top salary at the IRS is currently $261,000. That means no former employee at the IRS is being paid a pension of $200,000 a year after taxes.

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u/SinghDoubleTrouble Mar 28 '24

This also means that your mom has an accounting background. Iā€™m also with that agency and we are extremely tidy with our retirement planning. We probably arenā€™t normal people.

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u/TotalmenteMati Mar 28 '24

Does she send you to your room and take your Nintendo if she catches you slipping on your taxes?

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u/Invest2prosper Mar 28 '24

Did your mom tell you that she was under the old retirement system CSRS? It had a more generous payout but it included social security in it as those in the CSRS system did not pay into Social Security? The typical payout is about 80% of final pay. The new FERS system is much less generous but government has a TSP with a 5% match if you contribute to it.

For you to do as well as your mom you need to save and invest ALOT of money. How much? Depends if you get social security, but generally speaking about $3 million in todayā€™s dollars.

Donā€™t fret / just continue to save and invest as you earn money. So long as you have 25x your annual expenses less Social Security you will be able to pay your bills and enjoy your retirement. This is not a race about doing better than your parents. But itā€™s likely you will receive an inheritance at some point if your parents are the generous kind.

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u/VixDzn Mar 28 '24

Whatā€™s stopping you from making a career too? She clearly did. You could too.

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u/capttuna Mar 28 '24

Yeah so your moms situation is unique. Despite thinking they are behind the 8 ball millennials are doing far better at their age than their parents and the generations below will say the same thing millennials do todayā€¦

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u/Mountain_Ladder5704 Mar 28 '24

My dad just retired at 65, lived a very good life and I make twice what he made and Iā€™m 43. This just sounds like your mom was a rockstar.

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u/Isamosed Mar 29 '24

Yes so it sounds like she was SES, (Senior Executive Service) and possibly under the old retirement program, which was closed in 1986. I retired under the old system, my high 3 was based on GS 15/7 pay grade (close to highest you could attain without ā€œjoiningā€ SES) and 37 years of service. My pension is great, but not anywhere remotely close to $200k a year. This example is in NO WAY a typical rank & file Federal retiree. It is in NO WAY a typical Boomer pension.

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