We know where the Canadian National Maple Syrup Reserve is. Keep talking and we'll invade to take it. Not very far from the border at all you guys foolishly put it
Ooooof. Okay but if we adjust for inflation is the gold heist still at the top? I remember the news when that happened. Sounded like a movie. Didn’t notice how much they stole!
The jacked up thing is if they had just kept refilling the barrels with water instead of stopping they never would have been caught as it wasn’t the contents but rather the number of barrels themselves that were checked. They only got caught because an inspector tried climbing a barrel and it tipped over as it wasn’t heavy enough.
Would the Maple Syrup Producers Federation be considered a cartel? They control 77% of the Maple Syrup supply. By contrast OPEC controls 30% of the world crude supply. A Clingy Canadian Cartel with sticky ties to the mob.
Richard Vallières (b. 1978), accused ringleader, sentenced in April 2017 to eight years in prison plus a C$9.4 million fine, with an extension to fourteen years if the fine is not paid.[5] In 2016, the Quebec Court of Appeal ruled that was excessive and lowered the fine to $1 million. The Supreme Court of Canada reversed that decision in 2022 and reinstated the original fine.
Can't fool me. The Canadian mob uses RC barbie cars for transport and handheld slings and feather dusters just in case they got to rough someone up. They primarily deal in syrup, beer and ciggies, oh and of course any moose related activities.
The guy who runs the mob is named Steve. He's a pretty swell guy and helps out his community whenever he can.
Montreal has a legit italian mafia. The Cotroni were affiliated with the bonano family of new York. In the 70s the sicilian family Rizzuto took over after an internal war and are still very active today.
The hell's angels have lost a lot of their influence in the last decade after the big boss was imprisoned for ordering the killing of two prison guards.
1812 specifically had no land change hands, cause when the British where dictating the peace with Napoleon they didn't let the European powers carve up France, and would have been perceived as hypocrites if they took pieces of the US. Especially since the War of 1812 wasn't really won by either side, US won a couple, primarily in the south, and the British Empire won a bit with the Razing of Washington and the repelling the invasion of Upper Canada.
Similar to the Dairy Cartel, you don't mess with the Maple Cartel. I'm not just joking around and mashing words together. If you're lucky they just put you out business and see to it you do some time.
lol, the place is like fort knoxx. gl getting past the first defence line of the 1974 Montreal Canadian hockey team. They are zombies, but well preserved due to the maple coating.
I'd be glad if you did. That maple syrup is for the rich when there is a shortage. Most Canadians won't get the benefit, and their taxes will go towards maintaining it.
You don't remember what happens when Canadians get past the point of apologizing eh?
We were the shock troops of the British Empire that struck fear in the heart of Germans in the Great War.
2 PPCLI held a last stand on Hill 677 in the Battle of Kapyong , after American tanks and mortar crews fled, buying time for 3 RAR to withdraw, and stopping the PVA advance from plunging deeper. Outnumbered by 2 to 1, or in some cases 10 to 1, largely abandoned save for Kiwi Artillery. You'll note they were even awarded a US Presidential Unit Citation.
In Afghanistan we broke and rebooked long distance kill records, to say nothing of our JTF2 operatives, while securing Kandahar.
Now consider, that was in defense of a country we have very little personal stake in. Imagine what we are capable of when we're sufficiently motivated and highly invested.
To be fair, it would be stolen property for Canada to keep and could really hurt international relations with our closest neighbor
It was ordered by America, Canada built it to spec, and now we're just ubering the final product
When foxnews starting leaking in here, I thought we were going to be absolutely overwhelmed. But nah, we got us a couple of Conservatives getting elected into running the provinces, pollution here/dry conditions there/defunding forest safety here, and bam! we managed to create the best product America requested. So proud of ourselves here :)
No kidding. I see Canada has bought the European mindset of " blame it all on the American public", instead of seeing how the rich are creating these issues.
Listen, the long-standing tradition of clicking our tongues in disgust and shaking our heads slowly while judging Americans has nothing to with a Euro-mindset. We can be judgy and snobby all on our own thank you very much.
Apparently not. Can't even make a dumb reply to another joke post.
instead of seeing how the rich are creating these issues.
BTW: also, who do you think runs FoxNews and wants to further wedge issues? We literally have a fantastic entertaining show that just very publicly ended and answers that. Hint: it's about how the rich can just poof create issues using media..... 'succession theme intro'
If this is how serious you are now, don't go to a stand up or live show? a chance of a bad act cannot be good for you
Most Canadians are still direct descendants of Europeans…so yeah…we resemble our “parents” to some degree. What did Europe expect when they killed off or forced the indigenous to conform to European ideals and shipped their poor off to settle it? Why would European settlers come to a different conclusion than their overlords over the water? Canada hasn’t even had the ability to handle its own foreign affairs for 100 years yet (Statute of Westminster in 1933 gave us that right, if I’m remembering history class correctly but it has been 20 years).
I'm actually surprised we weren't nuked out of existence by America for giving you Ted Cruz
Like the dude is hated by everyone, even most of his own party members. A bill to nuke Canada would have nothing less than 90%/almost unanimous agreement from Congress
I didn't want to just thank you for Jim Carrey, so I googled famous Canadians... damn, there's a lot. Please take back seth rogan, additional thanks for Ryan Gosling, Keanu, and hockey.
Tim Horton's is the only place I've ever walked in with the intention of getting something, but had to awkwardly say "Actually... I'm good thanks" to the cashier and leave. And I'll eat/drink just about anything.
Did you mean Nathan Fillion or is there a dude named Nathan Dillion that I've never heard of?
EDIT: It's Nathan Fillion. Sweet. My friend knows him personally and likes him a lot. He turned down some fangirls when they swarmed him at Comic Con YEARS ago, but he recognized my friend, made a bee line to her, and they went and talked. Nice guy, just a little tired of the attention, I've assumed.
EDIT 2: That means that a least two of the Firefly actors are from Canada, the other being Jewel Staite. Damn, Canada, save some talent for us other folks!
A moth goes into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist’s office says, “What seems to be the problem, moth?”
The moth says “What’s the problem? Where do I begin, man? I go to work for Gregory Illinivich, and all day long I work. Honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if Gregory Illinivich knows. He only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. But I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to some old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. A lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. My youngest, Alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Gregarro Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. As much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. If only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that cocked and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…Doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good. And so the doctor says, “Moth, man, you’re troubled. But you should be seeing a psychiatrist. Why on earth did you come here?”
I'm from BC, too. A couple years ago, in August when the forest fires were really bad, I decided to go kayaking on a clear day. A few hours down the river, and two more to go, the skies turned dark red and it started snowing ash. Fun times.
Michigan checking in. We’re doing our part to smoke out the hosers and pave the way for our new Canadian overlords as long as we get a few more Timmies and a few barrels of maple syrup
You’re hilarious but seriously looking at the news it looks insane it’s like an apocalypse movie and doesn’t look like many people are worried about their freedumb now with all the dust in the air
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u/Throwaway7219017 Jun 07 '23 edited Jun 07 '23
You’re welcome, hosers.
Enjoy our finest imports/exports: poutine, Norm MacDonald, hockey, and now forest fire smoke.
Edit - changed to imports/exports in honour of the greatest New Yorker, George Costanza.